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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25334602">Challenge Accepted: College</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shtwriter_yup_datsme/pseuds/Shtwriter_yup_datsme'>Shtwriter_yup_datsme</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Challenge Accepted Series [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Bottom Cas, Bottom Gabriel/Top Sam Winchester, Bottom Sam, Dean Winchester Has a Panty Kink, Dean Winchester and Gabriel are friends, F/F, F/M, M/M, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Other, Past Kali/Gabriel, Past Leo Webb/Dean Winchester, Pregnancy Scares, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sam Winchester Loves Gabriel, Smut and Fluff, Top Dean, Top Gabriel, travelling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 05:09:18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>37,001</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25334602</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shtwriter_yup_datsme/pseuds/Shtwriter_yup_datsme</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Gabriel have finally left Souix Falls and with the help of their friends attempt to conquer college together while waiting for their boyfriends to join them for their journey</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel/Dean Winchester, Charlie Bradbury/Jo Harvelle, Gabriel/Dean Winchester, Gabriel/Sam Winchester, Meg Masters/Lisa Braeden, Really brief just an almost kiss</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Challenge Accepted Series [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1649614</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Moving In</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>The flight had been peaceful.</p><p>For Gabriel at least, Dean was hyperventilating the whole way, "I still can't believe you're afraid of flying"</p><p>Gabriel had said, "Shut up!- it's a totally normal fear!" Dean replied still scared as ever </p><p>Gabriel scoffed muttering under his breathe "Yeah, normal" </p><p>"Sweet digs" Dean said putting his bags down, Gabriel nodded "Yeah sure is" The apartment was big  furnished well enough to Gabriel liking, it was a surprise since the deal for the other apartment fell through </p><p>Dean yawned; tiredness from the flight taking over "Just don't forget I have to check into the dorms tomorrow-"</p><p>Gabriel whipped his head around "What?-you're not staying there" </p><p>"Then where am I gonna stay?" Dean asked raising a brow, "Right here you dimwit!" Gabriel exclaimed "You can't leave me alone, no for the next year this is our apartment"</p><p>Dean lazily rolled his eyes "You're not gonna let me say no aren't you?" It's not like he wanted to protest anyway, staying with Gabriel couldn't be that bad and the apartment was nice enough  </p><p>Gabriel smiled wide "Not a chance" </p><p>~</p><p>They had tried to unpack but they were too tired and jet lagged to do much so they ended up passing out in the living room on the couches till dark </p><p>"Code red!" Dean yelled; he had woken up first and when he did he realised that they had a big problem..no food</p><p>"What?- who's dead?" Gabriel groggily asked waking up, "We don't have any food" </p><p>Gabe shrugged "So? we'll just order something" Dean laughed manically "'We'll just order something'- from where?!" </p><p>Gabriel opened his lips to answer but nothing came out, proving Dean's point "Exactly" </p><p>"Hey hold up, I used to live here, I know all the best places, so we can just go out to eat- might even get some things for the apartment" </p><p>Dean sighed "Fine, but I want pizza..and burgers..and fries" Gabriel nodded "Sure thing buddy, so you want a heart attack?" </p><p>Dean rolled his eyes at Gabriel's teasing "Let's just go," </p><p>~</p><p>After lunch- (which Dean had to admit was delicious) though he still missed the roadhouse-, they went hunting for apartment supplies so they could start un- packing when they got back</p><p>Gabriel bought anything he liked with colors on them and Dean tried to do random things to make his friend laugh the whole time </p><p>"Aren't we supposed to call Sam and Cas?" Dean mentioned as they were unpacking the kitchen appliances, Gabriel shook his head "It's probably late for them right now we'll call later tonight" </p><p>"..I miss him already" Dean admitted and Gabriel smiled faintly "Of course you do, it hasn't even been a day Dean" </p><p>Dean looked at him quizzically "You don't miss them?" Gabriel shrugged "Of course I do- but I can handle myself, as long as nothing crazy and life changing happens I'll be fine"</p><p>Dean sighed, popping the cap off of a beer with his hand he jumped up onto the counter, Gabriel grabbed a beer for himself and joined Dean </p><p>He guffed "We're not gonna make it through the first year are we?" But Gabriel just grinned and they clinked beers "Challenge accepted"</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Settling In</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Gabe and Dean get drunk and have a heart to heart + a little Sabriel/Destiel</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>
  <em>4 weeks later</em>
</p><p>It'd been 4 weeks and so far school had been interesting, college was definitely different but having some of their friends with them like Lisa and Meg made it easy</p><p>They hung out a lot but except for school and new friends Gabe and Dean talked to Sam and Cas as much as they could about anything</p><p>"Sammy come on-"</p><p><em>"Gabe for the last time </em><em>I</em><em> am not having video </em><em>sex</em><em> with you!" </em>Sam exclaimed laughing, "You said anything I wanted!"</p><p>
  <em>"Okay </em>
  <em>but</em>
  <em> not that!"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel visibly deflated, "Fine..but can you at <em>least</em> take your shirt off?" Sam huffed and just when Gabriel thought his boyfriend was gearing up to say no to him he reached back to pull his shirt over his head</p><p>
  <em>"There happy?"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel raised a brow "Do you have a banana?" Sam laughed <em>"Sorry bananas </em><em>aren't</em><em> really my thing, </em><em>I'd</em><em> much rather wait to get on my knees for </em><em>the</em><em> real thing"</em></p><p>Gabriel's breath hitched and he let out a small squeak "You- I thought you said this wasn't video sex-"</p><p><em>"</em><em>It's</em><em>not</em><em>I'm</em><em> just screwing with you" </em>Sam smiled <em>"</em><em>How's</em><em> school?"</em></p><p>Gabriel waved a dismissive hand "Meh, school is school- nice hair by the way" He commented "You look pretty"</p><p>He noticed Sam's hair was getting longer, his boyfriend blushed "Shut up," He said though flustered "-Hey Gabe you done talking to Sammy?-ah!- why are you shirtless?!" He exclaimed covering his eyes at the sight of his brother</p><p>"Calm down" Gabriel said "We weren't doing anything, Sammy here is a big prude" Sam rolled his eyes but didn't comment </p><p>Dean moved his hand "Whatever, were supposed to finish fixing up the apartment, plus our stuff is here" Dean said barging into Gabriel's room; they'd only really worked on the kitchen having just started college</p><p>"Right.." Gabriel rolled his eyes "I gotta go" Sam smiled<em> "Love you,"</em> He said to Gabriel<em> "Dean, </em><em>don't</em><em> make </em><em>Gabe</em><em> do most of the work"</em></p><p>Dean scoffed "When have I ever-"</p><p>
  <em>"Bye!"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel laughed at Sam's sudden disappearance and he turned to meet Dean's eyes "I'm sure he was joking"</p><p>Dean rolled his eyes "Yeah, yeah let's just start"</p><p>Gabriel smiled and pulled himself up from the bed and followed Dean out "So how are you holding up?" Gabriel asked as they walked down the stairs</p><p>Dean shrugged "I talk to Cas everyday" He said pulling open a box "But it still sucks"</p><p>Gabriel sighed "Y'know, Meg said there's a party going on tonight, you wanna go?"</p><p>"I don't know..college parties aren't really my thing Gabe" Dean said "I kind of just want to stay in and drink until I'm numb"</p><p>Gabriel mulled it over "That actually doesn't sound that bad- stay home and unpack..drink, make a night out of it?"</p><p>Dean grinned "Deal" He ran over to the fridge to get the beers and some other snacks</p><p>They drank 5 beers each and though a little tipsy they actually managed to do a good job on the place</p><p>Everything looked..homey, and once done they fell down onto the couch, sinking into the soft pillows</p><p>"Hey" Gabriel muttered "What..what was your first time like?"</p><p>Dean stopped staring at his hand "Why..do you wanna know?" Gabriel chuckled drunkenly "Dude I'm bored and we don't have cable yet"</p><p>Dean paused before shrugging; Gabriel wasn't wrong "Only if you tell me yours" He said and Gabe nodded "That seems reasonable- now continue" </p><p> "My first time with a girl or with a guy?"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged nonchalantly "Both" Dean sighed "My first time with a girl was okay I guess, I was sixteen and drunk and we didn't even really know each other but it wasn't horrible" He said "I waited a while before going any further with a guy, I had this friend that just got out of college and we hung out almost everyday until we started dating"</p><p>"He was 22?"</p><p>"Hey don't judge me" Dean protested "..We didn't have sex right away but when we did it was..man it was fucking amazing" He smiled, "And it was different because I loved him"</p><p>"What happened?- sounds like you really cared for him" Gabriel asked curiously, "I did but..things happen, I was upset about it for a long time but then I met Cas..and Sam thought I was an emotionally constipated"  Dean looked at Gabriel "What about you?"</p><p>Gabe bit his lip for a second "Uh..my first- first, time wasn't perfect- hell it wasn't even good" He took a deep breath "I was raped, the guy I was messing around with when I was 13 got angry and handsy when I told him I didn't want to go that far- so he shoved his cock in my mouth and stuck his fingers in my ass but he didn't get much further before Luci showed up"</p><p>Dean's eyebrows raised and he suddenly felt less drunk "Woah- Gabe, you never told me-"</p><p>"-I've never told anyone but Sam, my parents don't even know" He sighed "I was so happy when we finally left Cali, to be honest I'm kind of scared to be back.."</p><p>"My <em>good</em> first time was with two friends when I was 15- a girl and guy, it was kind of a crazy night" He chuckled, "Cas doesn't know?" Dean couldn't help but ask</p><p>Gabe shook his head firmly "No, and he can't know-I'm supposed to be his big brother he doesn't need that on his mind"</p><p>Dean nodded "I won't tell him, I promise"</p><p>"Thanks" Gabriel looked at him "Hey Dean?"</p><p>"Yeah buddy?"</p><p>"I think I love you, platonically..I miss Sam so much..and I thought it would be hard but you make it easier" He nudged Dean's shoulder "You're my best bud"</p><p>"Is that the alcohol talking?"</p><p>Gabriel shook his head, Dean smiled back "Then right back at you shorty"</p><p>Gabriel scrunched up his nose "Do you hear that?" Dean nodded, pulling out his ringing cellphone, "It's Cas" He stood, walking into another room</p><p>"Hey babe"</p><p><em>"Hello Dean.." </em>Cas sounded shy <em>"I know you're probably busy but..</em><em>I</em><em> just </em><em>couldn't</em><em> fall asleep" </em>He said <em>"I missed you"</em></p><p>Dean smiled a little "I'm not gonna lie to you right now Cas, I am like..really drunk- but we can talk for as long as you need angel"</p><p><em>"Thanks Dean-..wait why are you drunk?" </em>Cas asked now sounding amused, "Me and Gabe thought it was a good idea to get drunk and set up the rest of the apartment, plus my heart hurt from being without you- I needed to numb the pain"</p><p>Cas chuckled <em>"That would be really sweet if you </em><em>weren't</em><em> shitfaced"</em></p><p>"Hey!- I'm a romantic" Dean protested, <em>"Sure"</em></p><p>"Okay..<em>sometimes</em>" He comprised making Cas laugh., they spoke for a half hour until Cas deemed himself tired enough to fall asleep before saying goodnight to Dean</p><p>Their long distance relationship scared him because most didn't work out due to cheating or the whole not being together thing and it scared Dean too but all they needed to think was-</p><p>
  <em>11 more months...</em>
</p><p>~</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Trust me it gets better!- I'm just trying to find my footing for the first few chapters</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Yay, College Parties</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Wow.</p><p>Dean really has hit an all time low, how his ex girlfriend and their messed up friends got him to go to this party still confused him, he looked around room; purple and blue lights, young college kids dancing and underage drinking </p><p>Man, he needed to find Gabriel "Meg!- yes!- where is Gabriel?" He said when he spotted his friend, She shrugged "I don't know probably playing beer pong" Meg looked him up and down "Un-wind, Dean-O loosen up- you look like you have a stick up your ass"  </p><p>Dean rolled his eyes "No I don't" She huffed and grabbed his arm and started leading him somewhere "What the hell-" She shoved a cup into his hand "Drink" </p><p>Dean looked at the solo cup "What is this?" Meg grinned "Liquid courage" </p><p>Dean didn't remember how many cups he had drank before he was going head to head with Gabriel at beer pong while other drunk teens watched "How are you so good at this?!" Gabriel exclaimed as they tied once again </p><p>Dean shrugged "A friend taught me" Thank god for Leo's beer pong skills, he was an excellent teacher, "He's not that good" Some voice from behind him said </p><p>He turned around "Excuse me?" He was looking at some rich kid and a white sweater sporting a watch that looked like it was worth 2 grand on his wrist "You wanna have a go?" Dean challenge- god he was drunk </p><p>The guy shrugged and 30 minutes later they were on their 2nd round of beer pong after Gabriel tagged out, Dean was drunk sure but he may have let the kid and his friends think that he was more drunk than he actually was, Gabriel knew this hence the cups of fruit punch he was giving Dean</p><p>He'd suckered the guy into one more round and this time he wasn't gonna fake it, a 2 thousand dollar watch was on the line, the cup was at the end of the long wooden table and Dean had to make the shot</p><p>Gabriel laughed as they left the party deeming it enough fun for one nighh "The look on their faces!" He smiled at his drunk ass friend "You're awesome- what are you gonna do with the watch?"</p><p>Dean shrugged "I don't know, give it to charity?"</p><p>"I still can't believe you drank that much" Gabe said scoffing at Dean, "Hey I'm in college okay?- I'm supposed to make dumb decisions- besides Meg started it" Dean protested though he was a literal mess, a few of the buttons on his shirt were undone and his hair was more messed up then Cas'</p><p>The way he looked made Gabriel thankful that he'd only had a few beers and some punch, "You my friend, are an idiot sometimes" Gabriel said as he was trying to get Dean into a proper standing position so that he could get to his phone</p><p>"What are you doing?" Dean asked, his words sounding slured but Gabriel could make them out "Calling an uber, neither of us are good to drive"</p><p>"Oh," Was all Dean could reply when he started to feel light headed, his body momentarily went limp and he stumbled almost face planting on the ground</p><p>"Woah-!" Gabriel spun around fast just as he was putting his phone back into his pocket he caught Dean in his arms, "I'm fine- I'm fine.." Dean insisted though his body was still being held up by Gabriel</p><p>They were so close like face to face close, Gabriel could smell the strong scent of alcohol on Dean's breath and he swallowed nervously</p><p>Dean looked into Gabriel's eyes and there noses brushed as they leaned in, but Gabriel managed to get back to his senses and stop before their lips touched pushing Dean away "Dean- no, we can't" He reminded Dean "Sam and Cas"</p><p>Dean nodded slowly "Right..yeah, sorry" Gabriel's phone buzzed in his pocket, he stepped away from Dean, it was a notification that their uber was around the corner</p><p>~</p><p>When they got home Gabriel put Dean into bed before going himself passing out cold when he hit the soft mattress </p><p>He shot Sam a quick text because he had forgotten to do so the night before and hopped in the shower, when he made it down stared Dean was in the kitchen pouring way too much cereal into his bowl "Morning Dean-O!" He said loudly on purpose "Shhh!-" Dean groaned "Too loud" </p><p>Gabriel chuckled "Sorry, my bad" Dean rolled his eyes "Y'know this is your fault, I only went to that party because you and Meg made me"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged swiping the cereal from him "Blame whoever you want, Mr hangover" He was happy that Dean wasn't talking about their almost kiss-he probably didn't even remember it, he didn't want to either</p><p> Dean's reply was cut short by the doorbell ringing "I'll get it"</p><p>Gabriel frowned- he didn't think they had invited anyone over or anything like that "Hey Gabe, some guy just shoved this leash into my hand- says it's your dog?"</p><p>Gabriel shot up "Dickie!" He exclaimed; he'd forgotten the dog was arriving "Hey Dickster!" He knelt down to pet him</p><p>Dean groaned "Oh don't tell me he's staying here?" He said, first Cas with the cat and now this? "I thought you liked Dickie?" Gabe questioned</p><p>Dean shrugged "I did..when I barley saw him- now he's gonna shed everywhere and do all the other annoying things dogs do"</p><p>"He doesn't mean that" Gabriel whispered to his dog "Look I'll take care of everything, I promise- Dickie is different, you guys just need to get to know each other"</p><p>"He's a dog!"</p><p>Gabriel stood "A dog that you will learn to love" He watched Dickie trott over to his little dog pillow that Gabriel used to keep in his old bedroom that he'd unpacked just days prior</p><p>"Fine, just keep him away from my stuff" He groaned and went back to his cereal</p><p>"Your prayers have been answered!"</p><p>Gabriel frowned looking up at the ceiling "God?"</p><p>"No you idiots" Meg said and Lisa closed the door behind her "It's us, by the way you should really lock your door more"</p><p>"Noted" Dean chimed in, and Meg grimaced at him "Who pissed in your coffee?"</p><p><em>'Hangover' </em>Gabriel mouthed and she nodded in understanding "Why are you guys here anyway?"</p><p>Lisa shrugged making herself comfortable as she put their bags down "To study- it's Saturday remember?" She smiled at Dickie "Cute dog"</p><p>Gabriel smiled proudly "<em>Thank you</em>- see Dean dogs aren't terrible"</p><p>"Bite me"</p><p>"I just might Dean-O" Gabe shot back with a wink and Dean rolled his eyes ignoring him "What dumb test is this random intrusion for again?"</p><p>"Professer Abbadon- the really mean one?- she's super strict" Meg and Dean shared a class so he knew all about their evil physics professer, her real name wasn't Abbadon but they called her that as homage to the knight of hell</p><p>
  <em>Yeah </em>
  <em>that's</em>
  <em> how bad she was</em>
</p><p>It's like she always had a stick shoved up her ass but everyone in their class had their own theories, Dean gave a long groan "Ugh- fuck, I hate her"</p><p>Meg sighed "You and me both buddy"  Dean shook his head "I never would've majored in engineering if I knew it was this hard"</p><p>Meg scoffed "It's not she just makes it" Gabriel clapped his hands together "Well-you guys have fun-"</p><p>"Where do  you think you're going?" Lisa looked at him "You're not leaving we all have to study" They were both majoring in business</p><p>Gabriel slumped his shoulders as he sighed "I know enough to just wing it Lis- I spent 3 years working with my dad"</p><p>Lisa nodded "And your parents must be proud of youyour for that" Gabriel nodded back with a grin shaking off her sarcasm <em>"Very"</em></p><p>After getting Gabriel to join in on the study session by offering candy and snacks they actually all got work done <em>and</em> manged to cure Dean's hangover before late and spent the rest of the night watching movies until 9</p><p>Dean tossed in bed, he couldn't sleep so he went downstairs to get a drink of water and found Gabriel in the darkly lit kitchen</p><p>"Gabe?" He was usually asleep at this time of night, but his hair was a mess and judging by the fact he was only wearing boxers Dean assumed he'd probably just rolled out of bed as well "You okay?"</p><p>Gabriel gave a weak nod- <em>god</em> he looked like shit warmed over "You taking your meds Gabe?" Dean questioned carefully and Gabriel scoffed "My <em>meds</em> are the reason I'm here, I can barley close my eyes"</p><p>"So you're taking them?"</p><p>Gabriel rolled his eyes "Yes I'm taking them" He sighed rubbing at his eyes with the palm of his hand "This was so much easier when Sam was around.."</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged "Because..he always knew what to do.. how to <em>handle</em> it better than I did" He sighed "I'm gonna try that sleep thing again..night"</p><p>Dean waited for Gabriel's door to close before he followed him upstairs into his own room</p><p>He grabbed his phone off the nightstand "Please pick up" He whispered</p><p>
  <em>"Dean?..I was studying what do you want?"</em>
</p><p>"At this time of night?"</p><p>
  <em>"Different time zones </em>
  <em>Dean</em>
  <em>"</em>
</p><p>"Whatever look it's Gabriel man, I think you need to talk to him <em>now</em>, he's not doing so good- and I don't think I can help him"</p><p>Suddenly Sam was less annoyed <em>"</em><em>It's</em><em>his</em><em>meds</em><em>isn't</em><em> it?"</em></p><p>"Yeah"</p><p><em>"Okay" </em>Sam hung up and called Gabriel</p><p>~</p><p>Gabriel was staring up at the ceiling when his phone started to ring, it was late so he was confused as to who it could be</p><p>He frowned when he saw caller ID <em>'Sam?' </em>"Hello?"</p><p>
  <em>"Hey Gabe"</em>
</p><p>"You sound..<em>gentle</em> why?" Gabriel said carefully <em>"Dean called me said </em><em>weren't</em><em> doing good" </em>Sam said truthfully <em>"Why </em><em>didn't</em><em> you </em><em>tell</em><em> me?"</em></p><p>"Because..you aren't here Sam- I didn't see how you could help" Gabriel said <em>"Gabriel you're hurting" </em></p><p>"No I'm dealing" Gabriel insisted "..You can't help because you can't hold me and tell me everything's gonna be okay" </p><p>
  <em>"..but Dean's there" </em>
</p><p>Gabriel grimaced slightly taken back<br/>"-I'm not gonna cuddle with your brother Sam" </p><p>
  <em>"But you could..find somebody else to help you like I can't" </em>
</p><p>"If you're talking about sex- I don't need it, or <em>want</em> it unless it's with you" Gabriel paused a thought suddenly popping into his head "Do you trust me Sam?"</p><p>
  <em>"Of course I do" </em>
</p><p>"..do trust me not to cheat on you?" </p><p><em>"Yes"</em> Sam said truthfully <em>"But..I can't help but think that someday you might want someone else"</em></p><p>"I won't" Gabriel said "I love you Sam,  you're the first person I've ever said it to and trust me you're gonna be the last"</p><p>
  <em>"Do you still have my shirt?" </em>
</p><p>"Yeah why?" </p><p>
  <em>"Put it on maybe it'll help, night Gabe, talk in the morning?" </em>
</p><p>"Yeah..night" He put his phone the nightstand and sighed before he rolled out of bed reaching into the bottom dresser, he pulled out one of Sam's shirts that Sam had let him keep and he put it on smiling faintly at the familiar smell of his boyfriend </p><p>He slept great for the rest of the night sending a silent thanks to Dean for caring </p><p>-</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4: Fucking Dreams</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Dean starts to miss an old boyfriend</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>-</p><p>
  <em>"Beer pong?" Dean said confused as he looked at the solo cups filled with beer at the end of the long wooden table "</em>
  <em>Where'd</em>
  <em> you get this idea?" </em>
</p><p><em>Leo</em> <em>shrugged</em><em> "Just now" Dean blinked "</em><em>I've</em> <em>never</em><em> played </em><em>before</em><em> and even if I</em><em> had I'd probably suck"</em></p><p><em>Leo nodded "Yup" Dean hesitated "Couldn't we have just made popcorn and watched </em><em>Brooklyn</em><em> Nine-Nine?" He huffed at the look on Lee's face "Fine- </em><em>but</em> <em>I'm</em><em> warning you this will be a disaster" </em></p><p>
  <em>"I </em>
  <em>don't</em>
  <em> even know how to play" Dean reminded him "</em>
  <em>It's</em>
  <em> simple, if the ball hits the table before going into a cup, I remove 2 cups, the cup you sank, and another cup of my choice, if there are only 2 cups left, the bounce shot will only remove the 1 cup, if a bounce shot is thrown, I can swat the ball away before the ball hits a cup" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean nodded "Okay you're on Webb" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean took a deep breath and took his first shot, the ball bounced off the table before landing in a cup "Crap" Dean swore as Leo </em>
  <em>removed</em>
  <em> 2 </em>
  <em>cups</em>
  <em> "My </em>
  <em>turn</em>
  <em>" </em>
</p><p><em>30 minutes later they were </em><em>both</em><em> drunk and surprisingly Dean was one </em><em>shot</em><em> from winning, "Prepare to be beat" Dean teased </em><em>gearing</em> <em>up</em><em> to </em><em>take</em><em> his shot </em></p><p>
  <em>"I love you" Leo spat out just as Dean threw the tiny ball, it </em>
  <em>still went</em>
  <em> in but he </em>
  <em>turned</em>
  <em> to </em>
  <em>Leo</em>
  <em> the second he heard it not even taking a moment </em>
  <em>to</em>
  <em> gloat </em>
</p><p><em>"What?" He muttered, "..Not cool, Lee"</em> <em>Dean</em><em> shook his head </em><em>and</em><em> walked past Leo "Dean.." He </em><em>followed</em> after him, <em>grabbing his arm</em> <em>"Why ar</em>e <em>you</em><em> upset?"</em></p><p>
  <em>"You only </em>
  <em>said</em>
  <em> that so you could win" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo nodded "</em>
  <em>Yes</em>
  <em>..and no" He kissed Dean abruptly, but it was soft and passionate, "I love you" Leo smiled "</em>
  <em>I've</em>
  <em> been wanting to say that for days" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"..I </em>
  <em>love</em>
  <em> you too" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>Dean's eyes shot up when he woke, <em>why was he dreaming about </em><em>Leo</em><em>? </em>"Fuck" He turned on his phone groaning at the date <em>of course </em><em>he's</em><em> dreaming about him</em></p><p>He looked down and found 3 miss calls from Castiel the most recent being 15 minutes ago,  he blinked himself awake a few times before calling Cas back</p><p>
  <em>"Good Morning Dean"</em>
</p><p>Dean smiled, listening to Cas ramble on they spoke for a few minutes but when Cas found out Dean had just woken up he insisted that his boyfriend get up and Dean reluctantly did </p><p>Gabriel was wide awake when Dean headed downstairs after his shower, his friend who he had seen looking so down just a few hours prior was dancing his heart out in the kitchen while he made pancakes</p><p>"I thought you'd never wake up!" Gabriel exclaimed when he saw Dean enter the kitchen, "You..seem happy"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged "Because I am" He paused, silently flipping another pancake "Thanks for calling Sam, I never would've done it"</p><p>"Did it help?"</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Yeah it did" Dean snagged a plate of pancakes "Good"</p><p>"..So who's Leo?" Gabriel asked as he set down his own short stack, "What?" Dean asked incredulously mid coating his pancakes in syrup</p><p>"You were saying his name in your sleep when I went to wake you up, I decided it was best to leave you" Gabe explained</p><p>"..He's my ex boyfriend" Dean admitted "Don't tell Cas, please- I only just started having these dreams"</p><p>Gabriel rose a brow "Don't tell my brother whom your dating that your having sexy dreams about another guy?" He said teasingly, "Yes?"</p><p>"..He's the one that got away isn't he?" Gabriel questioned referring to Dean's first love, Dean nodded "We broke up about a year ago..I was dreaming about the first time he said he loved me"</p><p>"And when was that?" Gabriel asked genuinely curious</p><p>"I had a week off from school so we drove up to a cabin, just us, he got me to play beer pong for the first time and just as I was about to win he said it" Dean shook his head "I remember being so pissed because I thought he only said it to make me lose.."</p><p>"You were head over heels for him" Gabriel said and Dean looked at him "I love Cas a lot I do, but I practically jumped into relationships after Lee- Lisa lasted 2 weeks but Cas was the first real anything I felt since we broke up, but I just miss him sometimes"</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Okay, my lips are sealed" He promised "It's okay to not be over someone yet, especially if you loved them"</p><p>"Thanks"</p><p>~</p><p>
  <em>Dean was in </em>
  <em>search</em>
  <em> for his jacket when he woke up in a room surrounded by drunk sleeping teens, </em>
  <em>they'd</em>
  <em> all crashed at a party and by the looks of it he was </em>
  <em>first</em>
  <em> to </em>
  <em>wake</em>
  <em> up </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He found his flannel hanging on the </em>
  <em>edge</em>
  <em> of one of the couches and snatched it as well as a pair of sunglasses; his head </em>
  <em>was</em>
  <em> already aching and the sun </em>
  <em>wasn't</em>
  <em> going to help</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Relived he </em>
  <em>didn't</em>
  <em> bring the impala and </em>
  <em>instead</em>
  <em> got a friend to </em>
  <em>drive</em>
  <em> him he started walking to the nearest coffee shop</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He pulled out his phone and called his brother "Dean?- where are you?-you </em>
  <em>were</em>
  <em> supposed to come home last night" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean walked into a coffee shop </em>
  <em>"I know but the </em>
  <em>party</em>
  <em> ran late and </em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> lost </em>
  <em>track of</em>
  <em> time, can you cover for me with mom </em>
  <em>and</em>
  <em> dad?- </em>
  <em>I'll</em>
  <em> owe you big time"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You </em>
  <em>don't</em>
  <em> have to </em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> already did it" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean smiled "Have </em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> ever told you how awesome you are?" Sam </em>
  <em>chuckled</em>
  <em> over the phone "Yeah, yeah just </em>
  <em>don't</em>
  <em> come back </em>
  <em>too</em>
  <em> hung over"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"</em>
  <em>Roger</em>
  <em> that bitch" </em>
</p><p><em>"Jerk" Sam retorted and hung up, </em><em>after</em> <em>Dean's</em><em> payed for his coffee he decided to take Sam's advice and get sobered </em><em>up</em><em>, luckily for him the pharmacy was </em><em>only</em><em> a block away and he needed </em><em>some</em><em> advil</em></p><p>
  <em>He easily found the medication </em>
  <em>and</em>
  <em> put it on the </em>
  <em>counter</em>
  <em>, "Do you have a prescription?" The girl </em>
  <em>said</em>
  <em>, she was young just his age </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean rolled his eyes under the glasses "Very funny Jean" She laughed "Have fun last night?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean</em>
  <em> shrugged "</em>
  <em>I've</em>
  <em> been to better parties" He paused "Why </em>
  <em>weren't</em>
  <em> you there" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"My </em>
  <em>parents</em>
  <em> are super strict remember?- </em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> had to watch my </em>
  <em>little</em>
  <em> brother" She said as she wrung </em>
  <em>up</em>
  <em> the </em>
  <em>advil</em>
  <em> for him  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Well the next party </em>
  <em>you're</em>
  <em> coming- no excuses" He insisted and Jean chuckled "Whatever you say Winchester" </em>
</p><p><em>He </em><em>paid</em><em> her and with a sweet goodbye he headed for the front door and found himself bumping </em><em>in</em><em> the </em><em>person</em><em> who just entered the store "Sorry!" He exclaimed fast "</em><em>It's</em> <em>fine</em><em> really-..Dean?" </em></p><p>
  <em>Dean looked up at the </em>
  <em>bumpee</em>
  <em> "Leo?" He returned, "</em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> thought you were in college- what the </em>
  <em>hell</em>
  <em> are you doing back here?' </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo shrugged "I just graduated, my dad dragged me back </em>
  <em>here</em>
  <em> for a few months" </em>
</p><p><em>"And </em><em>you</em> <em>don't</em><em> bother </em><em>to</em><em> call?- wow </em><em>I</em> <em>thought</em><em> we were friends" He said dramatically </em><em>teasing</em><em> him, "Okay, how 'bout next weekend hang sesh?" </em></p><p>
  <em>Dean nodded "</em>
  <em>Deal</em>
  <em>- </em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> want every college </em>
  <em>story</em>
  <em> you can give me- even the embarrassing ones" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I will </em>
  <em>never</em>
  <em> tell you the embarrassing ones" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean smirked "You can't say no to this face"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>"Gabriel!- hurry up!" Dean yelled from the bottom of he stairs, "You can't rush perfection Dean-O" Gabriel said as he came down the stairs</p><p>"It took you fifteen minutes to put on that?" Dean said looking at Gabriel outfit, he was only in a slightly big tie dye hoodie with a backpack slung over his shoulder and casual dark gray pants</p><p>Gabriel shrugged not saying anything more, Dean rolled his eyes "Let's just go"</p><p>"My pleasure" He muttered a goodbye to his peacefully sleeping dog before they left for the grocery store</p><p>~</p><p>
  <em>As promised they did hang out that week and a lot more times after</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean scoffed "Hey- I just broke up with a girl I was sort of dating- I deserve to have a drink" He took a swing of the beer</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo's brows raised "Sort of dating?" Dean shrugged "We hooked up a couple times" He squinted "She dumped me for some guy who I guess was a better lay or something"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You're 18 young padawon, you're probably gonna go through tons of girls before you find 'the one'"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean swallowed "Or guy," He added "And you are so not Yoda"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Guy?" Leo sounded shocked, Dean frowned "-Oh right you weren't around when I came out, I'm bi"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Really?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean nodded "My parents were not surprised when me and Sam came out..we were kind of obvious" He stood and grabbed Leo's guitar, sitting back down he started to strum "Do you even know how to play?" Leo asked; coming out of thought</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean shrugged "Kinda" Leo chuckled and put down his beer "Here" He sat behind Dean, putting his hands over his they fell into a rythum, he helped Dean strum lightly playing pretty decently</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He found himself turning his head to face Leo, getting lost in his eyes his strumming loosened, "This is so cliché" He managed to get out and Leo smiled "Yeah, straight out of a chick-flick" He let go of Dean's hand and took the guitar and moved to sit in front of Dean</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He paused for a moment before he started to </em>
  <em>strum flawlessly </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Show off" Dean muttered and Leo chuckled "I </em>
  <em>learned</em>
  <em> in college, my ex girlfriend taught me"  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean couldn't </em>
  <em>help</em>
  <em> but ask "..Why is she your ex girlfriend?" Leo shrugged "She wanted more out of the relationship" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"And you didn't?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I </em>
  <em>wasn't</em>
  <em> ready" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>There was silence for a moment before Dean was leaning over the guitar to plant a desperate kiss on Leo's lips, Leo kissed back immediately and discarded of the guitar</em>
</p><p>
  <em>His hand was on the back of Dean's neck as they have eachother short eager kisses, Dean's hands flew to unbutton Leo's shirt and he pushed it open pulling down the flannel, "Dean-wait are you sure?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean nodded "Fuck yeah- I've wanted to kiss you for weeks"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo chuckles "Ditto"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>They crawled onto the bed and Leo pinned Dean down, he pushed Deans shirt up and over his head, Dean watched Leo unbutton his jeans and pull out his cock, wasting no time Leo sucked him down and bobbed his head, Dean dug his hands in Leo's black hair and gave a long moan "</em>
  <em>Fuckkk" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He gently bucked his hips deeper into </em>
  <em>Leo's</em>
  <em> mouth, Leo </em>
  <em>continued to swallow and hum around Dean, making Dean lose control completely, his hips thrusting up, hitting the back of Leo's throat, all the while chanting Leo's</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It only took a few more swallows and swirls of Leo's tongue to have Dean cumming down Leo's throat, the second Leo pulled off of him and came back up Dean kissed him all while unzipping his jeans to get to his neglected cock, starting to stroke Leo fast it didn't take long before Leo was cumming onto his hand and stomach </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Panting hard Leo rolled off Dean, both guys struggling to catch their breath</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo turned to look at Dean"Welp that girl was an idiot for dumping you"</em>
</p><p>~</p><p>"Dean- Dean!" </p><p>Dean jumped slightly "Hmm?- what?" Gabriel gestured to the cereal boxes in his hand "You gonna pick one?"</p><p>Dean looked down "Oh, um" He quickly chose a box adding it the cart, "You alright?" Gabriel asked and Dean nodded "Yeah, just distracted" He was still staring at a different area and Gabriel turned his head to look "Panties?" Dean was staring at the underwear section </p><p>Dean didn't even realise where he'd been staring but a thought made him raise his brow</p><p>"Can I ask you a question?" Dean asked "Yeah sure"</p><p>Dean avoided Gabe's eyes "You've gotten off before right?"</p><p>"Dude almost everyone in the world has"</p><p>"I know-but have you done it differently?" Gabriel didn't really get what Dean was trying to say..until he did "Oh you mean with toys!- hell yeah, sometimes I just like being by myself" He frowned "Why do you ask?"</p><p>"..I'm just curious, thinking about it"</p><p>"Do you have any kinks?"</p><p>Dean cleared his throat awkwardly "Um..maybe panties?" He said quietly and Gabriel beamed "Ohh panty kink!" He made sure keep the excitement in his tone down</p><p>"But I like them okay?"</p><p>Gabriel dragged them into the panties section.</p><p>"Pick a color"</p><p>"I think pink?"</p><p>"Great choice, Cas loves a man in pink"</p><p>That got Dean thinking a little, "Does Cas wear panties?- I mean I know he's trans but-"</p><p>"Cas' is gender is based on how he feels, he is a guy, it's forever what he'll identify as, but sometimes yeah if he's feeling it he'll wear something society deems girly or feminine" Gabriel explained "So yeah, I think if he really wanted he'd wear 'em"</p><p>-</p><p>
  <em>1 week and 4 days later</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean woke up with a groan; he had messed around with his boyfriend the previous night and stayed over at his place, both of them falling asleep half naked in each others arms</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo was well..Leo, they'd known each other since they were kids because of their families, Leo was about 4 years older than Dean and he was fresh outta college</em>
</p><p>
  <em>When he came back to town him and Dean just..came together, it was a little recent but it didn't matter, Dean had always had a crush on the older boy for years</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He even remembered when he was 14 and Leo had a boyfriend named Elliot..yeah </em>
  <em>it's</em>
  <em> safe to say that Dean hated Elliot </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Lee?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Morning, sleeping beauty"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean rolled his eyes lazily "Shut up" He looked up at Leo who had one of his arms slung behind his 6 "When did you wake up?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Like 15 minutes ago" Leo paused "Shouldn't you be in school right now?" Dean frowned "Well what time is it?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo checked his phone "Uh..seven, forty" Dean's eyes widened "Shit- really?- I've got like half an hour" He scrambled get his shirt throwing it on as well as his pants while Leo watched trying not to laugh</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You're a dick- you know that?" Dean said trying to button up his jeans, "I can drive you if you want?" Leo offered "It's not like I have anything going on"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Then what the fuck are you still doing in bed?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo smiled though he pushed himself into a sitting position "What ever happened to my laid back boyfriend?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean blushed faintly at how Leo called him his boyfriend, "I might be 'laid back' sometimes but my parents are not-"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yeah, yeah" Leo stood up and grabbed his boxers putting them on, he kissed Dean "School, priorities, parents, I get it" Dean kissed him back "Thank you"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You know I was thinking.." Dean started on the drive to school, Leo looked at him briefly "About what?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Sex"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo laughed "Seriously?- okay what about it?" Dean chewed the inside of his cheek "..We haven't actually..done anything"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo stared out the window "Oh..well, what do you want to do?" He knew that their sex life was more blowjobs and handjobs they'd never actually gone further than that before</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean sighed "I'm going to try be as blunt as possible and you don't get to laugh- got it?" Leo nodded "Got it"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"..I want you to fuck me" Dean blurted, Leo shifted "Wow you were not kidding about the 'blunt' thing" He said "Are you sure- because I'm totally okay with bottoming"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean rolled his eyes "I know you are but I want your dick in my ass" Leo chuckled "Damn, okay we can do it whenever you want" He said as he pulled up to the school</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean nodded "Okay" Leo smiled and leaned over to kiss Dean</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Suddenly there was a knock Dean's window and he rolled it down to meet his brothers angry face "Dean you jerk you didn't tell me you were staying with Lee tonight, I had to walk to school"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I didn't?- really?" Dean teased, "Sorry Sam, that's on me" Leo said "We were busy"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I don't even want to know" Sam said, and Dean shook his head "You really don't" He grabbed his bag and he got out of the car "See you tonight"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Tonight" Leo confirmed and gave the two a wave before driving off, Sam frowned "Tonight?- what's tonight?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean put a hand on Sam's shoulder "Sammy you really shouldn't ask questions you don't want the answers to" Sam rolled his eyes "Gross"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"So when are you going to tell mom and dad?" Sam asked as they entered the school "Tell them about what?" Dean replied ignorantly</em>
  <em> trying to avoid the question </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"About you and your new boyfriend"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean shrugged "I was thinking never" Sam scoffed "They like Leo"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean sighed, opening his locker "He's 22, dad would probably flip" Sam shrugged leaning against the other locker "You're 18 Dean, I think you'll be fine"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yeah.."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sam frowned "Wait, that's not it is it?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"What?" Dean muttered not acknowledging how his head was in his locker "I don't know what you mean"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You're scared that if you that if you introduce Leo to mom and dad as your boyfriend your relationship will become real" Sam was smiling but when Dean slammed his locker shut and fell against it with a heavy sigh he sympathized</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Dean.."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yes!- okay you're right, I'm scared..I'm not good at commitment and this thing with Leo it's awesome- I just don't want to ruin it"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sam shrugged "</em>
  <em>It can still be awesome even if you tell mom and dad about him"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>When Dean and Gabriel got home Dean quickly helped Gabe unpack and ran upstairs with his new purchases</p><p>He'd chosen blue and hot pink panties as well as taking a sex toy from Gabriel- one he had yet to use thank god</p><p>He undressed himself, slipping into the pink panties, taking a moment to embrace the soft material, laying down on the bed taking a deep breath</p><p>He reached for the lube that was beside him rubbing some against his hole, sucking in a cold breath he slowly slipped one finger inside, slipping it in and out until he was ready for another- and <em>another</em></p><p>-</p><p>
  <em>"Leo!" Dean exclaimed with a loud and off key strum of the guitar "You're late" Dean sat up, Leo lifted a bag </em>
  <em>that</em>
  <em> was in his hand "I got snacks" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean's</em>
  <em> eys widened "Ohh" He smiled as Leo tossed him the bag, "Did you go through my things?" He said teasingly noticing a drawer or two had been opened</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean shrugged "Hey!- I was bored" He said with </em>
  <em>a</em>
  <em> mouth full of chips as he reached on the bed behind him, standing up "I found this by the way" He said holding a picture of Leo when he was a few years younger- Dean's age maybe </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo groaned "I should've burned that thing a long time ago" Dean chuckled "I think you look cute" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Give me that" Leo said, "Why?" Dean teased, "Because I'm going to burn it" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"No" Dean said and Leo reached for the picture to snatch it from his hands "Hey!" Dean laughed as Leo fought to grab the picture from him </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo was fast but Dean was faster blocking almost every attempt Leo made to take the picture from him, until finally Leo had got it and they ended up staring into each others eyes  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean smiled, he leaned for a kiss and Leo happily obliged, the picture forgotten as it dropped to the ground </em>
</p><p>
  <em>His hand was on the back of Dean's neck as they have each other short eager kisses, Dean's hands flew to unbutton Leo's shirt and he pushed it open pulling down the flannel </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean lifted his arms over his head and they parted momentarily when Leo pulled his shirt up, messing up his hair</em>
</p><p>
  <em>They fell back onto the bed and Dean's hands fell keeping him up as his bare chest rose and fell with the way he was breathing </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He brought his hand to cup Leo's cheek as they rolled around sharing deep kisses until Leo ended up on top</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He snaked down Dean's lean body and he popped open the button of his jeans, pulling them down and off his legs </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean felt himself twitch, Leo got back up and kissed him and Dean opened the button on Leo's jeans and rolled them over so he was on top feverishly attacking Leo's lips </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Their erections grinded together making them moan, "Oh, fuck" Dean breathed moving to suck hickeys to Leo's neck "Oh yeah Dean" Leo moaned into it </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo's hands softly cup his sides to roam his body, using one of his hands even going as far as to rub at Dean's bulge </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Dean, pants" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean nodded and went to work on removing Leo's pants and discarding them</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo sat up to kiss him before rolling them over again so that Dean was laying comfortably on the pillow, he pulled down Dean's boxers and looked at his boyfriend</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Last chance to back out" He said and Dean scoffed and shook his head "Not a chance"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo got the lube from his nightstand and applied a generous amount, he pressed a slick finger against Dean's hole and pushed his way in</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He felt Dean tense but he didn't hear protest so he didn't stop "Relax" Was all he said and continued, he fingered with one digit Dean until he deemed it okay to add another</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Soon Dean was stretched and ready and he gave Leo the go head, Leo rolled a condom over his dick and lubed it up, he began to push his way past Dean's rim</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Fuck.." Dean cursed under his breath "You want me to stop?" Leo asked and Dean's head shook so Leo kept going until he was fully seated having bottomed out in Dean's ass, but he didn't move until he saw Dean's breathing even out </em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>Dean slowly slipped the dildo inside of himself, the size was smaller than average so it was easy for it to bottom out in his ass</p><p>He thrusted it in and out until he made prostate contact,<em> "Nngg" </em>He moaned reaching to grasp his cock through the sheer lacey fabric</p><p>He pulled it down just a little so that he could wrap his hand around his dick and matched his jerks to his thrusts</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He thrusted slow, watching Dean's head fall back to be buried in the pillow and his eyes squeezed shut as he squirmed "Oh..fuck yeah" He felt Leo's cock inches away from his prostate "Harder Lee" He ground out, eyes still closed</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo deepened his thrusts at Dean's request and Dean pulled him down for a kiss, they rocked together perfectly, whimpering against each others lips </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You feel so good Dean" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean bit back a smile "Yeah..right back at you' He rolled down onto Leo "Yes"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo gripped Dean's waist tighter and thruster harder feeling his own orgasam start up, he grabbed the back of Dean's neck and wrapped an arm around his mid-section rolling them over </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean didn't know how to ride guys but when Leo started to thrust up he just worked his hips down</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean bit his lips as his moans became louder, everytime Leo hit his prostate he was even closer, "-Fuck, Leo- mmph"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Are you gonna cum?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>Dean nodded feeling his orgasam near as he sped his movements <em>"Ahh..fuck- fuck"</em></p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean nodded fast and Leo wrapped his hand around Dean's cock, when he started to stroke Dean his boyfriend was cumming all over their chests "Leo!"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He felt the condom fill up as he clenched down on Leo "Fuck" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo pulled out and let Dean roll off of him "You good?" Dean chuckled "I'm awesome"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo kissed Dean softly "..Is this forever?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"What?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Are we gonna last?- because I can't..I don't think I could handle not knowing whether we're just gonna end up being memories-"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Do you think we're gonna last?- be honest" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo rolled over onto his back, "I..I don't know" Dean shrugged, rolling onto his back as well "Doesn't mean we can't still have fun, I want you to be good memories" He paused "Are you okay with that?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo's hand reached out for Dean's, and lingered before they intertwined "Yeah, I think I am" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"..We're not gonna see other people though right?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Oh hell no"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p><em>"Cas" </em>Dean ground just as he finally came, spilling his cum all over his stomach, he gave it a few seconds before he started to feel oversensitive and pull the dildo out</p><p>He frowned, he was so confused- his feelings were everywhere- <em>Leo</em>- <em>Cas</em>- <em>Leo</em>-</p><p>He huffed sticking a hand into his hair "Fuck me"</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Leo?" Dean got out of bed, he couldn't find his shirt so he grabbed Leo's and put it on, strutting off into the kitchen in his boxers </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Oh- I was just about to wake you up" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean's eyes lit up "Ooh- bacon" he reached for the bite sized pieces but Leo held the plate from him "You little- give me the-" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Ah- ah, ah- I think you're forgetting something" Leo shook his head and stuck a short piece between his teeth, Dean scoffed and rolled his eyes, walking up to Leo he bit down on the bacon and ate his way to Leo's lips, giving his boyfriend a short kiss before snatching away the bacon </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo smiled and kissed him on the cheek "Good morning" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean jumped up onto the counter "Do you wanna meet my parents?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"What?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean shrugged staring at </em>
  <em>the</em>
  <em> ground "Sam said something to me and it made me think.." He said "I didn't </em>
  <em>want</em>
  <em> to tell my parents that we were dating because </em>
  <em>it'd</em>
  <em> make us real"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo stood between </em>
  <em>Dean's</em>
  <em> legs and picked up his head "</em>
  <em>You're</em>
  <em> sacred?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean </em>
  <em>nodded</em>
  <em>, "Me too..but </em>
  <em>we're</em>
  <em> real" He kissed </em>
  <em>Dean</em>
  <em> softly "You really wanna tell my dad we're dating?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo paused "Does he still have </em>
  <em>that</em>
  <em> gun collection?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>Dean cleaned himself up and headed down stairs for something to eat, he pulled open the fridge and sighed too tired to cook he decided on instant noodles</p><p>He grabbed his food out of the microwave and sat himself down on the couch next to Gabriel who was watching TV</p><p>"So how'd it go?"</p><p>Dean shrugged "..I don't know it was new..confusing"</p><p>Gabriel frowned "Confusing"</p><p>"My feelings are everywhere" He said "What is so wrong with me?" He set the food down on the table "He didn't cheat on me- we never fought or anything like that- hell I didn't even want to end it but I knew it was coming"</p><p>Gabriel raised a brow "You talked about your break up?"</p><p>Dean sighed picking at his food "We talked about a lot of things" He huffed and layed on the couch, his feet over Gabriel's lap "What is wrong with me Gabe?"</p><p>"Nothing Dean"</p><p>"Then why do I feel like there is?"</p><p>Gabriel sighed "Dean you need to talk to Cas, be honest"</p><p>Dean grimaced "And say what?- I'm having confusing love dreams about my ex boyfriend whom I was deeply in love with?"</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Yes"</p><p>Dean sat up "You're joking" Gabriel shook his head "I'm not- now go do it" He grabbed Dean's food "I'm gonna eat these noodles"</p><p>Dean braced himself, every ring of his cellphone made him want to back out so badly but when Cas answered it was too late<em> "Dean?"</em></p><p>
  <em>"Dean?" </em>
</p><p>"I wasn't completely honest when I told you about me and Leo- my <em>ex- boyfriend, </em>and I'm not as okay with our break up as I seemed- I loved him a lot- like so much and recently I've been having these really confusing dreams <em>about</em> him and it's so messed up because I'm with you- I'm dating <em>you-</em>"</p><p>
  <em>"Dean what are you saying?" </em>
</p><p>Dean took a deep breath "..I think I  need time to pull away from my old relationship before I can fully committ to ours.." His eyes fell closed for a moment "Cas I'm so sorry- I know this is the last thing you want to hear-"</p><p><em>"</em><em>It's</em><em> okay" </em>Cas said, his voice light and calm <em>"You </em><em>can't</em><em> control how you feel- and we </em><em>haven't</em><em> been together all that  long..take the time you need Dean, </em><em>I'll</em><em> be here when </em><em>you're</em><em> ready- </em><em>I</em><em> love you always" </em></p><p>"Cas-"</p><p>
  <em>"Don't apologise again-you shouldn't, just </em>
  <em>don't</em>
  <em> completely fall off the grid </em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> want a call at least once </em>
  <em>a</em>
  <em> week" </em>
</p><p>Dean smiled "Yeah..okay"</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. James</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>
Gabriel tsked "Shit, I lost my phone- it's probably back at the party I'm gonna go get it- you okay on your own?"</p><p>Dean nodded "Yeah, just be careful" He continued his way back to the apartment and Gabriel headed back to the dorms</p><p>The place was a mess but he managed to find his phone sitting on the beer pong table before he started to walked back when the phone started to ring</p><p>
  <em>"</em>
  <em>Find</em>
  <em> your phone yet?"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel laughed "What do you think dumbass?" Dean chuckled<em> "Just hurry back or </em><em>I'm</em><em> gonna eat all of your candy"</em></p><p>"Okay- fine I'll start running" He hung up just when a voice spoke from behind him that sent chills down his spine "Who was that your boyfriend?"</p><p>He slowly turned around "You look good- still slutting around?"</p><p>Gabriel hid how badly he wanted to throw up "Fuck off" He turned around to leave but James grabbed his arm running in front of him "Woah- Woah, where are you going?"</p><p>James yanked his hair and hit his head against the wall, Gabriel stirred for a second but then managed to deck him "You son of a bitch-" James punched him twice and shoved him in to the janitors closet</p><p>Whatever happened after that was kind of a blur to Gabriel just flashes of being pushed against a wall and having his pants pulled down and <em>James</em>..</p><p>Gabriel groaned, the room was empty James having left he manged to get his pants back on and though his head was pounding, he stood and grabbed is phone put of his pocket, he had dozens of messages from Dean</p><p>
  <em>How long had he been out?</em>
</p><p>He looked at the time and he'd only been gone for 40 minutes, he winced at the pain in his ass and willed himself not to cry as he realised what happened to him<em> "Oh god"</em></p><p>~</p><p>Gabriel knocked urgently on the door since he wasn't able to find his keys; he'd been keeping himself together since James left and he managed to get back to the apartment</p><p>Dean opened the door with a beer in his hand looking slightly suspicious "Gabr-" He cut himself off when he looked at his friend, his clothes were messed up and his hair the same- not to mention Gabriel's face said it all</p><p>Something bad had happened</p><p>Gabe ran into the apartment and sat on the couch shaking slightly probably from the cold of outside "Gabe?- what happend?" Dean asked concerningly staring at him</p><p>Gabe ignored the tears that were streaming down his face "I was raped..James he-.."</p><p>Dean was shook "James?- the guy who raped you before?- how?!" Gabriel nodded and reluctantly told Dean the whole story of what happend his bestfriend listening while rage slowly began to fill Dean- the thought of someone taking that from Gabriel- just made him angrier</p><p>But one thing Gabriel made very clear was that he didn't want to do anything about it</p><p>Gabe wanted to just change and go to sleep but Dean insisted he take a shower and Gabe had stared at him with this almost serious puzzled look "Why do you care so much?"</p><p>"'Cause you're my bestfriend Gabriel and I love you to bits"</p><p>"..Fine, I'll take a shower" Gabe muttered and headed into the bathroom, he stayed in the water for about 2 hours, washing the blood and the feeling of James' hands from his body- it didn't help much but he had to get out at some point</p><p>He wore his burgundy Stanford sweater and a pair joggers and he made a mental note to burn his other clothes; he headed back into the living room where Dean was "You okay?- that was a pretty long shower" Dean said looking up from his laptop</p><p>"Peachy" Gabriel gave a sarcastic smile "What are you doing anyway?"</p><p>Dean shrugged "Nothing" He muttered and slammed his laptop shut, "Dude..what the fuck are you hiding?"</p><p>"Nothing"</p><p>Gabriel scoffed "Then lemme see-" He grabbed for the laptop but Dean shielded it away which then started a rousing game of keep away, which Gabriel won at flipping open the device</p><p>"Army boot camp application?" Gabriel blinked "Wait what?..De?"</p><p>"..I was thinking of enlisting" Dean admitted "I haven't told anyone- especially Cas so please-"</p><p>"You were serious?- when you said you wanted to enlist you weren't joking?" Gabriel shook his head "Dude, you're my bestfriend you can't die on me!"</p><p>Dean rolled his eyes "I'm not gonna die"</p><p>"You <em>really</em> wanna get your ass shot off in some stan somewhere?!"</p><p>"Don't quote shameless at me" Dean warned, he sighed and sat with Gabriel "Look man, college isn't for me okay?- and I really wanna do this"</p><p>"Dean you've been doing really good- what about Cas?- and Sam..what about me?"</p><p>"It's just boot camp Gabe- yes if I actually enlist I'll have drop out but that's not for a while" He gave a smile "Promise"</p><p>"..Fine- I still don't think it's a good idea but fine" He scoffed "Can't wait till Cas hears this"</p><p>Gabriel stood and went upstairs; he had a pack of smokes in his room and really needed one right now</p><p>Dean didn't want him to be alone so he followed Gabe upstairs a few minutes later and found him outside</p><p>It was open and he was leaning over the balcony, just staring into the dark sky</p><p>The smoke was to calm his nerves and stop him from sobbing uncontrollably, he blamed himself more than James- if he hadn't froze- if he'd just tried harder then maybe- "Gabe?" Dean joined him on the balcony</p><p>Gabriel didn't look up "Please don't tell anyone" He said dryly blowing out the smoke and Dean shook his head "I won't- promise"</p><p>"Thanks" Gabriel stared out the window "..What am I gonna tell Sam?..how do I even..."</p><p>"He's not gonna blame you-"</p><p>"I blame me!" Gabriel exclaimed suddenly, he sighed and hung his head "I blame me Dean"</p><p>"Don't- you can't, think like that Gabe"</p><p>Gabriel shook his head "Twice, this is the second time I let the same guy take advantage of me"</p><p>"Gabriel you were 13 he was older than you- stronger than you"</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Yeah everybody seems to be" He walked to the bed and threw his smoke away, "I'm gonna go to bed"</p><p>-</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Three More Months</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Gabriel this isn't healthy" Dean said watching Gabriel pull out another cake from the oven "Baking distracts me" 

Gabriel said not looking up as he stacked the last cake on top and shed the sides before he started to crumb coating his layered</p><p>"Gabriel you have to talk to Sam, he keeps asking if you're okay and I can't tell him the truth"</p><p>Gabriel paused for a moment "..I don't know what to say to him.." He said "He's gonna ask me what's wrong and I don't want to lie to him" He sighed "Sam is so caring and <em>involved</em> and I don't want to tell him that I was raped over the phone"</p><p>"Okay but just do <em>something</em>, you can't avoid him forever"</p><p>"Actually I can-"</p><p>"You know what I mean!"</p><p>Gabriel chuckled "Fine but if it backfires then I'm blaming you" He kept crumb coating and Dean focused on his homework until he heard almost inaudible sobs "Gabe?"</p><p>Dean looked up and saw Gabriel quietly weeping and he stood up immediately to go the counter and embrace Gabriel in a hug letting his friend cry into his shoulder "It's okay, Gabe- it's gonna be okay" </p><p>He got Gabriel upstairs and into bed with a slice of his delicious cake, "Not my best work but this is good" Gabriel mumbled around a mouth full "Good?- Gabe this is awesome"</p><p>Gabes reply was cut short by his phone ringing, Dean looked at the caller ID "It's Sam isn't it?" Gabriel asked with a sigh and Dean nodded "Want me to turn it off?" </p><p>Gabriel took a deep breath, setting the cake aside "No..I'll talk to him" Dean hesitated "You don't have to if you aren't ready" </p><p>Gabriel shrugged "It's okay" Dean handed him the phone "I'll wait outside" </p><p>Gabriel answered, "Hi"</p><p>
  <em>"Gabe!- finally, what is going on I've been calling for days- are you okay?" </em>
</p><p>Sam was talking a mile a minute and Gabriel would've laughed if he didn't feel like he wanted to cry "I..had a depressive episode, I didn't want to tell you it was nothing really" </p><p>
  <em>"Are you okay now?"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel tried to answer but he just started to tear up again <em>"Gabe?"</em> </p><p>"No- no I'm not- and I want you to be here to make it better-" </p><p>
  <em>"...I know Gabe- I wish that I was"</em>
</p><p>~</p><p>Castle knocked on Sam's door "Sam?- Michael said that you've been in your room all day"</p><p>Sam tossed his phone having just gotten off a call with Gabriel "It's Gabe..he's hurting more than he's letting on and he won't talk to me"</p><p>Castiel sighed "Gabriel's always been like that, he doesn't know how to let people in, I think he just needs time"</p><p>Sam scoffed "Yeah- at least your relationship is holding up"</p><p>Cas cleared his throat "Actually..me and Dean are taking a break" Sam turned his head fast "What?- when did that happen?"</p><p>Cas picked at his nails "Last week" Sam shifted "And you didn't tell me?- why did it happen?"</p><p>"Dean started to miss and ex boyfriend of his and said he wasn't ready to be together if he wasn't over his ex" He sighed "It sucks but I understand, he seemed to really love the guy"</p><p>Sam nodded "He did" Cas finally looked at him "You knew him right?- what were they like- be honest"</p><p>Sam shrugged "I don't know much but they were kind of inseparable, Leo was the first person Dean dated that I actually liked, they were perfect for each other- so in love, I have no clue what happened but I was too busy being a jerk I didn't see how bad he was hurting"</p><p>"But- still being honest here, you were the first person Dean caught feelings for after their break-up, the fact that he said he needed time to think was good- not a lot of people would do that"</p><p>Cas smiled shortly "Yeah" He paused  "You should call him again <em>Gabriel</em> don't give him the chance to lie just tell him how you've been feeling"</p><p>Sam hesitated "Sure but <em>first</em>- I need icecream"</p><p>~</p><p>"How'd it go?" Dean asked coming back into the room, "Same as always-'I want you to be here but you're not here'"</p><p>"..Sam think's that I want sex with other people" Gabriel admitted sadly "He's not wrong for thinking it" </p><p>"Gabriel he knows you'd never he's just trying to understand" </p><p>Gabriel nodded "I know, I bet you miss it though with Cas" </p><p>Dean shook his head with a shrug "Me and Cas never had sex" </p><p>"What?"</p><p>"Yeah we never got that far" Dean said casually, "Then what the hell was all that moaning me and Sam used to hear?" </p><p>"Uh making out?..I wasn't ready and Cas didn't want to push so we never did" </p><p>"You never told me"</p><p>Dean shrugged "Didn't think it mattered" He cleared his throat "Speaking of not telling you things..I signed up for training- I start tomorrow"</p><p>Gabriel huffed "Don't remind me- I'm happy for you Dean really but-"</p><p>"You're scared too- so are my parents, but they still want me to do it" He sighed "My dad of course is proud and my mom is too but obviously worried"</p><p>"Yeah, rightfully so"</p><p>"C'mon" Dean said "Where going out" Gabriel groaned "Dean- I can't, I just want to lay in bed"</p><p>"What good will that do?- you can't let it take over your life, what he did- I know you can't change in a day but you should at least be trying"</p><p>"..Okay fine, where are we going?"</p><p>
  <em>D</em>
  <em>ean smirked</em>
</p><p>~</p><p>"No- Gabe you need more skin!"</p><p>Gabriel huffed walking back into the bathroom with more clothes "Dean I'm not trying to get laid"</p><p>"No you are trying to show people what they can't have-you're 19, you're <em>young</em>"</p><p>Gabriel chuckled "Okay, gimme a minute" He came out of the bathroom in a loose light tie dye tank top and fitted black skinny jeans and the back of his hair was tied up in a man bun the rest hanging free</p><p>Dean wolf whistled "That is what I'm talking about!"</p><p>Gabriel blushed "Yeah, yeah let's just go"</p><p>After Dean got changed they headed downstairs to find Meg and Lisa waiting for them "Wow Gabe you look-"</p><p>"Don't start Meg" Gabriel stopped her and she held her hands up defensively "Hey, I appreciate nice things"</p><p>"She said standing next to her <em>girlfriend</em>" Lisa joked and Meg kissed her on the cheek "You know I love you babe"</p><p>They all headed to a college bar and the first thing Gabe did when he got there was order a drink..and then five more</p><p>"So what are the <em>rules</em> of your break with Cas?"</p><p>Dean frowned "What rules?" He asked sipping his beer, "You know- like if I dared you to go make out with that girl who's been staring and your ass ever since we got here would you do it?"</p><p>Dean flushed, feeling so suddenly put on the spot "I don't want to do that- we're not gonna see other people" Gabriel shrugged "M'kay" He chuckled when his ass started vibrating "Gabe that's your phone"</p><p>Gabe stopped laughing "Oh" He muttered pulling it from his pocket "Hey it's Sammy" He looked around "It's loud in here- I'm gonna go outside"</p><p>Dean nodded watching Gabriel leave through the back of the bar "Hello <em>Samwise</em>"</p><p>
  <em>"Hey Gabe- are you drunk?" </em>
</p><p>"Maybe?- Dean dragged me to this- uh..<em>bar</em>" He kept walking to get away from the loud bar behind him and ended up bumping into someone</p><p>"Oh- sorry" He apologized immediately looking up "Oh you can run into me anyday" Came a girls voice</p><p>
  <em>Kali</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Gabriel?-"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel grimaced "God what do you want?" Kali smiled at him, a sweet but deadly smile one Gabriel doesn't miss "You"</p><p>"Ugh- yeah no thanks"</p><p>Kali rolled her eyes "Oh come on Gabriel..don't be like that- remember how much fun we used to have?"</p><p>Gabriel scoffed "Remember how manipulative you are?"</p><p>"Oh come on it's not like you haven't been staring at me all night" Her hand trailed down to grope his ass and he flinched jumping away from the touch</p><p>Sam heard ruffling and he assumed the worst</p><p>"Woah- no- no- no- we are not doing that" He said pushing her hand off of him "I don't know what your aim is- but I have a boyfriend- Kali"</p><p>She scoffed "A boyfriend? now I know you're joking, you couldn't be monogamous if you tried" She said "Besides even if you are telling the truth..he doesn't have to know does he?"</p><p>Sam's eyes widened and he felt a pang of hurt in his chest, but he didn't hang up</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Yeah- yeah- <em>no</em>" He stepped away from her "Even if I wasn't in a serious relationship I still wouldn't go near you with a ten foot pole"</p><p>Kali's look darkened "You're not being serious?" Gabriel sighed "16 year old me didn't have standards- but unluckily for you I grew up"</p><p>He ignored her jaw drop, "Now if you'll excuse me I have a call to make"</p><p>"You're making a mistake" She called after him, "Yeah I'll be the judge of that!"</p><p>"Sorry Sammy what we're you saying?"</p><p><em>"You could've gone with her"</em> Sam said</p><p>"You heard that?" Gabe said, <em>"..You could've gone with her"</em></p><p>Gabriel shook his head "I didn't want to, it was a no brainer"</p><p><em>"You've really never even thought about it?..being with someone else?"</em> Sam said shyly, Gabriel nodded "Yeah Sam I have"</p><p>Sam's heart broke but Gabriel wasn't done "And I realised how miserable I would be, Sam I never even so much as looked at someone because I didn't want anyone else, I am drunk out of my mind right now and <em>still</em> all I want is you"</p><p>
  <em>"Really?"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel paused "You know what Kali did to me?- she fucked me up so bad I was almost so far gone" He said trying not to gag at the memories "She'd get me drunk or high and then say all the right things to have me wrapped around her finger, I'd sooner die than go back to that"</p><p>
  <em>"</em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> didn't.." </em>
</p><p>"It's okay Sammy- now I doubt this is the reason you called"</p><p>
  <em>"Right- </em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em> just wanted to </em>
  <em>know</em>
  <em>..if you needed space" </em>
</p><p>"What?"</p><p>
  <em>"Cas told me about him and Dean- and if </em>
  <em>you</em>
  <em> need space </em>
  <em>I'll</em>
  <em> give it to you, just say the word" </em>
</p><p>"Sam, I know I haven't been telling you things but the last thing I need is space, hearing your voice everyday is the only thing that keeps me going" He smiled "Three more months"</p><p>
  <em>"Three more months" </em>
</p><p>~</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Recovery</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>"I got a job!" Gabriel sang happily as he burst through the front door</p><p>Dean frowned looking up from his cheeseburger "Why?" He knew that Gabriel didn't need one, Gabriel closed the door "Because I get to work around cake- duh"</p><p>"You got a job at a bakery?- are you sure you can handle that?"</p><p>Gabriel narrowed his eyes "I think I'll be fine" He smiled "I start next week"</p><p>Dean still didn't like the idea and Gabriel noticed this "Oh for the love of- Dean the place is only 10 minutes away, if you want you can pick me up after school" </p><p>"Fine" Dean agreed, "I'm gonna take a nap" He said standing from the couch with a yawn, Gabriel frowned "What?- it's only 12pm" He protested</p><p>Dean shrugged taking his half eaten plate of food to the kitchen "Training has been taking a lot outta me" He put it in the fridge, he looked at Gabriel "You really think this new job is a good idea?"</p><p>Gabriel nodded "It gives me a reason other than Sam to get up in the morning"</p><p>"Okay, then I'm happy for you- you gonna tell Sam about this?"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged "Probably" He smiled softly "Things have been good between us-like..<em>so</em> good"</p><p>"What about you and Cas?"</p><p>Dean winced, "We're almost there" Things with Dean and Cas had been better and they were thinking about rekindling there relationship hell they'd even accidentally dropped the L- bomb once over the phone "Night weirdo- don't wake me up unless it's life or death"</p><p>"Sweet dreams"</p><p>~</p><p>Dean was just about to slip into bed when his phone started to ring and he groaned eternally "Dammit Sammy what the hell do you want?"</p><p>
  <em>"Where is Gabe?- </em>
  <em>he's</em>
  <em> not answering my calls </em>
  <em>again</em>
  <em>"</em>
</p><p>Dean sighed "Calm down he's not ghosting you again, he's just in the shower"</p><p><em>"Oh" </em>Sam paused <em>"..You </em><em>didn't</em><em> tell me </em><em>you</em><em> broke up with Cas"</em></p><p>"Oh my- we did not 'break up' Sam, we're just taking a break for a little until I'm ready"</p><p>
  <em>"What about Cas?"</em>
</p><p>"We're fine Sam, I know he's your friend too but really" Dean's lips fell into a thin line, "I'm not trying to hurt him I just want to know that I can whole heartedly be there for him.."</p><p>He gawd on his lip "..I broke up with him, Leo- I mean, or I guess <em>we</em> broke up with each other..it was after we found out that we were moving" Dean's eyes fell closed for a second "You said that'd I'd never loved anyone before but I loved Lee and when we broke up it hurt a lot so I didn't tell you what happened"</p><p>
  <em>"Dean..I'm sorry-"</em>
</p><p>"You were 16 and hurting, I don't blame you Sammy"</p><p>
  <em>"I was a jerk wasn't </em>
  <em>I</em>
  <em>?"</em>
</p><p>Dean shrugged "Bitch is more like it"</p><p><em>"</em><em>I'm</em><em> gonna choose to ignore that" </em>Sam sighed <em>"Take care Dean"</em></p><p>"Right back at you"</p><p>~</p><p>Weeks passed and soon it wasn't gonna be that long until they got to see Sam and Cas again</p><p>Dean was preoccupied with his training- which he had been acing and Gabriel very much enjoyed his job and his new boss who he thought of as more of a friend so things were really looking up for the both of them</p><p>"Hey Dean?"</p><p>"Yeah?" Dean offered from the couch, "C'mere lazy"</p><p>Dean huffed in annoyance but complied, joining Gabriel in the kitchen "Try this" Gabriel said shoving a piece of chocolate into Dean's face</p><p>"Mmph!" Dean moaned at the intrusion into his mouth but the sound quickly turned pleased as he chewed on the chocolatey heaven in his mouth "What is this?"</p><p>Gabriel smiled "You like it?- I made it myself" He said "It took me forever to make the perfect recipe-"</p><p>Dean's eyes bugged out of his head "You made this?- by yourself?"</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Yeah I was bored and thought it'd be fun" He frowned "Why are you staring at me like that?"</p><p>"Dude this is like..<em>really good</em>- it's like the holy grail of chocolate you could sell this!"</p><p>Gabriel scoffed "Yeah I'll pass" Dean gaped "What?- why?- you can sell the recipe for like a lot"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged "Even if I wanted to I wouldn't even know where to start this whole thing was just a stupid idea I had"</p><p>"Well this stupid idea might just make you rich- more so than you already are" He stood "Think about it" He reached into the container for more chocolate "I'm gonna take these"</p><p>~</p><p>Dean panted happily taking deep breaths to still his beating heart, he turned the speaker on his phone off and brought it to his ear "That was..interesting" He said "I didn't know that you were so good at phone sex"</p><p>He could hear Cas' smile<em> "Neither did </em><em>I</em><em>- but </em><em>I</em><em> could tell you enjoyed it"</em></p><p>Dean smiled though he knew Cas couldn't see him "Yeah I did" Having finally been over his ex Dean could really enjoy his relationship with Cas and he used every free moment he had to do so and they were doing awesome</p><p>"Dean!- stop having weird phone sex with my brother I need to talk to you!"</p><p>Dean rolled his eyes "And the after glow has been ruined" He muttered into the phone making Cas chuckle</p><p>"I heard that!"</p><p>"No you didn't!"</p><p>"..Yeah I didn't.."</p><p>"Alright Cas, Gabe needs me- we'll talk later?"</p><p>
  <em>"Definitely"</em>
</p><p>Dean put his phone aside and went to the bathroom to get cleaned up, unlocking the door and telling Gabriel that he could come inside as he did so</p><p>"..So phone sex huh?"</p><p>Dean shut the bathroom door behind him "Let's not" He said "What did you want to talk about?" </p><p>Gabriel sat up further on Dean's bed and crossed his legs "Well I talked to my boss about the whole chocolate thing and apparently she has some connections to some company and if they like my recipe they'll buy it from me" He shrugged "I'll have to go over the legal bits with my dad but that's the gist of it"</p><p>Dean raised a brow "Really?- dude that's awesome" Gabriel avoids Dean's eyes "I'm glad you think that because if this actually happens I'm gonna need <em>a lot</em> of your help"</p><p>Dean deflated "Gabe as much as I'd love to I like spending my free time with Cas more"</p><p>"I'll give you five percent of whatever they buy me for"</p><p>Dean didn't even blink "Deal"</p><p>~</p><p>"8 million dollars?!"</p><p>Gabriel nodded "They <em>really</em> liked it and a lot of their friends did to- and  that's not even it- whatever sales profits they make I'll get ten percent" He reached behind him and handed Dean a check "This is your five percent"</p><p>Dean laughed "Two dollars?" Gabriel smirked "Move your finger"</p><p>"Two million- what?!" Dean looked up at him "Gabe I can't take this- I'm really okay with you just buying me dinner or some shit"</p><p>"You can and you will it's a done deal Dean-O, besides if it weren't for you I never wouldve gone through with it"</p><p>Dean was more than speechless, he surged forward and hugged Gabriel "Dude this is.."</p><p>"Don't mention it"</p><p>"I mean- 8 million dollars dude what are you gonna do?"</p><p>Gabriel tsked "I was thinking about that and since you're leaving on a few months and Sam and Cas are almost here we could spend the summer traveling- I've always wanted to take my Sammy to France"</p><p>"Do you even speak French?"</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Yes I do" He smiled "And my parents have a house there- it'd be awesome!"</p><p>Dean hesitated "If Cas is in I'm game" Gabriel wrapped an arm around Dean and Dean rolled his eyes "Just think Dean-O in three weeks our lives are gonna change for the better"</p><p>"Yeah because I get to hear somebody else's voice for the first time in twelve months"</p><p>"Ouch"</p><p>-</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Reunion</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gabriel was quietly studying on his bed, he was swamped with having to go through the paperwork of his deal as well as school work</p><p>Just as he let out a frustrated huff he heard the front door open, he frowned thinking it was Dean until he quickly remembered that his roommate was going to be out for at least a few more hours</p><p>He quickly but quietly got up from his bed and reached for the bat he kept leaning on his closet</p><p>He slowly snuck downstairs and took a peak, queitly tiptoeing into the living room he swung he bat at the assailant, who ducked just in time not to get hit "Gabe what the hell!"</p><p>Gabriel blinked he knew that voice-though it was a bit deeper- "Sam?" He frowned the boy looked near unrecognisable with his side bang almost covering his right eye and a awkward smile paired with a worn gray big bang theory shirt under his blue flannel</p><p>"Yes!- now why the hell were you trying to kill me with a bat?!"</p><p>"I wasn't trying to- how did you get in here?!"</p><p>Sam huffed "You gave me a key remember?!" Gabriel nodded sheepishly "Righhttt I did sorry" His mood then immediately sky rocketed when he got hold of the situation "Sam!" He exclaimed happily hugging the boy, Sam hugging back instantly</p><p>"I thought you weren't coming for another week?!"</p><p>Sam shrugged his snowy coat off along with his scarf "I wanted to surprise you- I'm just now realising that was a bad idea, when the hell did you get a bat anyway?"</p><p>Gabriel looked suspicious as he squinted "You don't need to know" Sam laughed and picked Gabriel's face up into a kiss which Gabriel immediately embraced "Fuck I've missed you" He breathed and Sam chuckled quietly "Me too"</p><p>Gabriel jumped into Sam's arms and Sam sat him on the kitchen counter, they kissed feverishly and tongue and all- hell they deserved it but they were so busy with each other that they didn't even hear Dean come in "Gabe I'm- what the hell?!"</p><p>They pulled apart and Dean's jaw dropped "Sammy?- I thought you were gonna be here next week?"</p><p>"Well..we wanted to surprise you" Sam said with a deep breath needing to get his back after making out non stop with Gabriel</p><p>"<em>We</em>- so Cas is-"</p><p>"Hello Dean" Cas smiled, "Gabriel, you look good- by the way thanks for the help Sam" He teased referring to the rest of the bags he had carried up by himself</p><p>Sam flushed "I was going to-" Cas waved him off "I'm just teasing"</p><p>~</p><p>Cas was nervous- like really nervous, his first date with Dean in a year he was praying that it goes well, he'd been staring in the mirror for the past ten minutes while Sam was changing in the bedroom and he was shaking like crazy</p><p>"Sam can I borrow your eyes for a sec?" Cas asked from the bathroom</p><p>"Sure"</p><p>Cas opened the door looking sheepish "Is this too much?" Sam smiled at him "You look great Cas"</p><p>Cas smiled back, calming down a little "So do you- looks like you're thinking of getting laid tonight" He grinned slightly at Sam</p><p>"What makes you say that?"</p><p>Cas picked up the bag that sat on he dresser and tossed it to Sam "I thought it was mine" Cas grinned "You're on the pill"</p><p>Sam blushed "Uh..no!- I mean..yes?" Cas chuckled and Sam sighed, his cheeks were red from the embarrassment "I just thought..in case-"</p><p>"No I get it- really, just try to keep it down" Cas teased</p><p>"Thanks"</p><p>~</p><p>Dean dragged Gabe to his bedroom to talk while their brothers were getting themselves changed for dinner in Gabriel's room</p><p>"What?"</p><p>Dean closed the door "Have you told him yet?"</p><p>Gabriel knew he was referring to Sam</p><p>"Told him what?"</p><p>"You know what"</p><p>"..-Oh that I was raped?- no it hasn't come up" Gabriel said with sarcasm dripping from his tone "Why not?"</p><p>"Dean they just got here- and the first thing you want me to say- is 'hey babe I missed you- <em>also</em> I got raped by the same guy that shoved his cock down my throat when I was thirteen, how was your year?'"</p><p>Dean sighed Gabe did have a point, Gabriel deflated sitting down on the bed "Dean..I'm not even sure I can have sex with him tonight"</p><p>"Sam's not gonna make you if you don't want to"</p><p>"But what if he starts asking questions?" Dean shrugged "Then tell him the truth- well not the whole truth, just that you don't wanna talk about it"</p><p>"..I promise I'll tell him I just need time" Gabriel said "But if I have to tell Sam you have to tell Cas about your thing"</p><p>"Oh come on!"</p><p>"Fair is fair Dean-O" Gabriel grinned smugly and stood opening the door "What were you guys talking about?" Sam asked when they finally went downstairs</p><p>Gabriel smiled "Oh nothing!- just how much we've missed you" Cas scoffed "Yeah sure"</p><p>Gabriel glared at him, the rest of the night was pretty great they caught up on some of their missing time, staying up late into the night after coming back from dinner</p><p>They cleaned up and Dean and Cas turned in to Dean's room to do..god knows what</p><p>For Sam and Gabe though, almost the second they got into Gabriel's room Sam had pounced on his boyfriend he picked Gabriel up and pushed him against the wall lips attached "Mmph!" Gabe gasped it was so sudden he didn't really see it coming</p><p>Gabe blinked rapidly and finally kissed back; so many thoughts ran through his head, but what he knew was that he had to make a decision whether he wanted to have sex with Sam or not</p><p>Somehow his brain was telling him that he wasn't ready but his mouth said "Fuck- Sam-bed"</p><p>Sam smiled and happily obliged easily picking Gabriel up again and putting him down onto the bed, he kissed Gabe's neck "I missed you so much" He whispered, being more gentle and slow</p><p>Gabriel smiled "Missed you too" They kissed long and slow, they hadn't touched in so long and just being together again felt so good</p><p>They momentarily parted to free each other of clothes, when they were almost naked -both just left in underwear- Gabriel got a cold feet and hesitated a little</p><p>He layed back while Sam kissed at his neck but then he stopped and frowned noticing how still Gabriel was "Babe?..are you okay?"</p><p>Gabriel shook it off and turned Sam over onto his back "Perfect" Sam -who was seemingly convinced - put a hand around the back of Gabe's neck and pulled him down to resume the kissing, this time it was even hotter, they were moaning louder, pawing at each other</p><p>Sam started sucking on Gabriel's neck and throat again, it just made Gabe grind his hips down harder on Sam causing great friction but Sam needed more</p><p>Gabe bit his lip with a smile "As much as I'd like to keep kissing you I think we should.." Sam smiled back "Yeah,"</p><p>Gabriel slid down Sam's body and removed his boxers, he pushed Sam's legs up and grabbed his lube, he spread some over Sam's hole and on his fingers</p><p>He slipped one inside Sam and gaped a little "I thought you'd be tighter" He said slipping in another finger, "Have you been.." He trailed off and Sam blushed "Maybe" He pushed back on Gabriel's fingers, he panted a little "Always thought about you"</p><p>"I'm flattered Sammy"</p><p>Sam moaned when Gabe's finger came in contact with his prostate "G-Gabe I'm ready c'mon"</p><p>"Okay- fine, I'll save the teasing for next time" Gabe liked it..he felt like his old self again, witty and sexual..he smiled "Condom?"</p><p>Sam shook his head "Uh..no" Gabriel raised a brow, "Really?- you're sure?" Sam nodded "Yeah, I'm on the pill..I want to feel you" Gabriel smiled faintly and spread Sam's legs, positioning himself he started to push past Sam's loose rim, "Mmph..Gabe" Sam groaned gripping at Gabriel's arm</p><p>His boyfriend nodded and bent down kissing Sam as their bodies rocked together, Gabe thrust his hips hard burying himself inside Sam's inviting heat, he pulled back and Sam let out a whine of disapproval but it was short lived because Gabriel slammed back in with all he had</p><p>They parted for Gabe to continue the earthshattering pace- it was so good Sam fisted the sheets, his hair was a mess his mouth agape and his back arched as he slowly lost it "Gabe- <em>harder</em>"</p><p>Gabe lifted Sam's long leg over onto his shoulder to deepen his thrusts "Oh that's it- Gabe..<em>yes!</em>" Sam's eyes rolled back in his head as his body went ridged, he clenched down hard on the cock buried inside him as his own untouched dick pulsed out cum over his stomach</p><p>Gabriel gently rode him through it before putting Sam's legs down and grabbing Sam's hips and giving him one last hard thrust, Sam was spasming on him when Gabriel finished filling Sam's hole with his warm cum</p><p>"Mmph" Sam moaned as Gabe slowly pulled out falling beside Sam, "Fuck I missed you" Sam pulled Gabe on top of him and kissed him hands roaming Gabriel's naked body</p><p>Gabriel smiled and kissed back enthusiasticly, happy with Sam's touch, he felt better than he had in weeks "Missed you too"</p><p>~</p><p>"Hey Cas can we talk?" Dean said finally emerging from the bathroom, Cas quirked his brow suspiciously as he sat cross legged on the bed in only his boxers and a t-shirt "Good talk or bad talk?"</p><p>Dean sighed "..Both?" He got into bed with Cas, sitting across from him "..Okay" Cas nodded, and Dean hated the look on his boyfriend's face, but he had to go through with it</p><p>"..I'm dropping out of Stanford after summer break, I'm leaving" He swallowed sadly "For army camp, I've been training this past year"</p><p>"Oh," Castiel breathed not knowing what else to say, "Oh, that's.." He chewed his lip and pushed forward to hug Dean "Sorry, I know I should be happy for you but we've already been apart for a year"</p><p>"It's okay Cas, I understand" He smiled a little into Cas' hair "We just have to make the most of the time we got"</p><p>He kissed Cas and his boyfriend flushed "Y'know we've never actually.." He started and Dean's brows raised at the realisation of what Cas was trying to say "You want to?"</p><p>Cas nodded pulling off his shirt and boxers, rolling onto his back "Make love to me" Dean's cheeks heated up at the words, he bent down to kiss Cas "Fuck-I love you"</p><p>He removed his own clothes and got a condom, rolling it over his cock and lubing himself up, he didn't just push into Cas right away as that would probably be uncomfortable for Cash and besides he wanted to favour the moment</p><p>"You-you can touch me..down there" Cas moaned guiding Dean's hand to his crotch</p><p>Dean kissed Cas and played with the slit between his legs, just lightly fingering him as they made out, everytime Cas tensed up he felt more slick on his fingers and smiled</p><p>"Ready?"</p><p>Cas nodded and Dean slowly began to push himself inside Cas, not stopping until he was fully seated, "Angel?"</p><p>Cas bit his bottom lip "Move" Dean buried his head in the crook of Cas' neck while his boyfriend clung onto him as he began to make short shallow thrusts into him</p><p>Cas moaned lowly and wrapped his legs tightly behind Dean's lower back, deepening Dean's thrusts, he snaked a hand between their bodies and reached down rub his clit</p><p>He marvelled at the fullness and warmth, he was only on the brim of pleasure for a couple more thrusts until Dean gave a particularly hard one and his eyes blew open "Dean!- there!- <em>harder</em>"</p><p>Dean complied and suddenly they were chasing their orgasms together, Cas felt his hips spasm and he was climaxing around Dean just a few seconds before his boyfriend was spilling into the condom</p><p>Dean immediately rolled off of Cas as not to smush him and smiled "That was.."</p><p>"Worth the wait" Cas finished and Dean turned to him kissing his cheek "Read my mind"</p><p>-</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Telling Sam</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gabriel lovingly stared at Sam, having woken up first he couldn't help but stare at the beautiful and relaxed face</p><p>He thought about how the boy sleeping before him was all his, but then he felt a pang of hurt in his chest at lying to Sam- he hated that he had been touched by someone else when he was Sam's, he knew his boyfriend would never ever blame him but it didn't stop the pain</p><p>Sam smiled soflty as he woke up, slowly opening his eyes to look at Gabriel "Morning"</p><p>"Hey" Gabriel whispered back, "You're crying" Sam pointed out but Gabriel just smiled "I'm just really happy you're here" He leaned forward and kissed Sam who grinned evily "Really?"</p><p>He turned Gabriel onto his back so he could snake down Gabriel's body "Mm...Sammy" Gabriel closed his eyes as he let Sam tug down his boxers and take him in his mouth, bobbing his head and swirling his tongue</p><p>Gabriel faintly registered his hips thrusting up when Sam's throat flexed around him "Oh...fuck" His hand went to Sam's hair helping him bob up and down and just two minutes later Gabe was giving Sam a quick warning that he was close and Sam happily swallowed him down</p><p>He tucked Gabriel back into his boxers and popped back up from under the sheets, smiling brightly as he kissed Gabriel's cheek "Wake me up in an hour" He snuggled up to Gabe</p><p>Gabriel chuckled "Are you serious?- why'd you wake up then?" Sam shrugged "So that I could give my boyfriend a blowjob- you're not complaining are you?" He teased and Gabriel shook his head as Sam's eyes fell closed "Never"</p><p>~</p><p>"Are you staring at me?" Dean muttered lazily as he felt eyes watching him, "I'm trying to count the freckles on your cheeks"</p><p>Dean opened an eye "So you're staring at me" He smiled turning onto his back as Cas crawled onto him with a peck to his lips "I could get used to this" Dean muttered as they traded kisses</p><p>"Mmm..ditto"</p><p>Suddenly Dean's phone buzzed repeatedly and his eyes shot open "Shit- shit-" Cas tumbled off of him and Dean reached for his phone rolling his eyes at the alarm that said in all caps 'Get up you idiot!'</p><p>He turned back to Cas "I am so sorry-I forgot that I was supposed to train today- I never forget it's just.."</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"I haven't had sex in a year either so I've actually been relaxed for once"</p><p>Cas chuckled at that "It's okay Dean- go, you can make it up to me later" Dean smiled thankfully and kissed him on the cheek before scurrying out of bed to get into the shower and Cas smiled happily as he watched Dean go</p><p>~</p><p>"Hey where's Dean?" Sam asked as they had breakfast, having finally woken up</p><p>"Oh he's-"</p><p>"He went out for a run" Gabriel said quickly cutting Cas off, "Because he does that now"</p><p>Sam shrugged "Huh" Was all he said and made his way to the living room</p><p>Cas turned his head sharply "Why did you do that?" He asked in a hushed whisper, "Dean doesn't want him to know yet" Gabriel explained also whispering, "Not until he's ready"</p><p>Cas rolled his eyes "I think that's stupid but fine I won't say anything"</p><p>"Hey Gabe?"</p><p>Gabriel gave Cas a look before heading to the couch to sit with Sam "Yeah?"</p><p>"Is there a library near?- I wanna get an early read on some law books"</p><p>Gabriel chuckled kissing Sam on the cheek "Of course you do"</p><p>~</p><p>A ring.</p><p>Dean was looking for the perfect ring, he hadn't been lying when he said that he had to go train but after he also needed to search for an engagement ring</p><p>He knew that he and Cas hasn't been together for that long but he was leaving for- well even he didn't know how long and he wanted to do something special for Cas</p><p>There was zero doubt in his mind that Castiel Novak was the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with and after a while of searching he'd found the perfect ring, one that matched the color of Cas' eyes, he'd smiled internally</p><p>Leaving the store with the ring he headed back to the apartment in the Impala since Cas and Sam had driven it all the way to California, he made only two calls on the way</p><p>"Cas?" He knocked on his- <em>their </em>bedroom door "Are you decent?"</p><p>"Yes Dean" Cas replied sounding a little annoyed but it just made Dean smile as he entered the room</p><p>Cas was sitting cross legged on the bed with his headphones pulled down and his laptop opened up in front of him "Whatcha doing?"</p><p>Cas shrugged "Watching Netflix" Dean closed the door "Well y'know how I promised to make up leaving so abruptly this morning?" Cas nodded "Yeah why?"</p><p>"I was thinking dinner this weekend- like a date just the two of us?"</p><p>Cas smiled "That sounds nice, I'd love to"</p><p>~</p><p>Sam got home from the library late, it was dark in the apartment, he flipped on a light and set down his keys, shrugging off his jacket</p><p>"Gabriel?"</p><p>"In here!"</p><p>A yell came from the kitchen, Sam frowned he flipped on the kitchen light and Gabriel walked out the kitchen coming face to face with Sam</p><p>Sam looked his boyfriend over "Gabe are you drunk?"</p><p>Gabe shook his head "No," He grimaced "Wait did you say <em>drunk?-</em> yeah I am <em>hammered</em>" He snorted</p><p>"Gabe give me the bottle" Sam tried to get it from him but Gabriel held it back with a chuckle "No!- it's mine!"</p><p>"Gabriel why are you drinking?"</p><p>"Because..I can!" He exclaimed and chugged down more of his drink- the bottle was almost empty but Sam could tell he'd probably had more</p><p>Gabe spilled lightly when he pulled it from his lips "Oops" He wiped his mouth chuckling as he walked back into the kitchen "Don't be such a buzzkill Samich"</p><p>"Gabriel," Sam started softly trying a different approach "Are you okay?" Gabriel sighed hopping up onto the kitchen counter, and finally putting down the bottle, "No..No I'm not" He put his arms out "Carry me?"</p><p>Sam nodded picking up his boyfriend Gabe wrapped his arms around Sam's neck and his legs around Sam's lower back as he took him to their room, "You wanna tell me about it?" Sam asked as he pulled off Gabe's socks</p><p>Gabriel shook his head, "Nah, not right now" Sam shrugged "Okay," He quirked a brow "Pants?" He questioned and Gabe shook his head again so Sam pulled off his sweats and threw them into the hamper</p><p>He lifted Gabriel's shirt over his head, replacing the alcohol stained shirt with one of his that he knew Gabriel liked to wear to bed</p><p>Gabriel cupped Sam's face with a drunk smile, he nuzzled into Sam's neck "I like your touch Sammy- you don't touch me like he touched me"</p><p>Sam gently pulled him away "Who- who touched you Gabriel?" Gabriel sighed scooted further up the bed</p><p>Sam pulled the covers over him, Gabe gave a small yawn "James, he hits me and he just goes so-fast it hurts.." He sobbed slightly, a tear falling from his eye to the pillow his head rested on "I didn't want him like that but he forced me..I just froze I couldn't move" He looked at his boyfriend with pleading eyes "I <em>swear</em> I didn't want him Sammy- I'd never-"</p><p>Sam's eyes were widened at Gabriel's confession "I know you'd never- Gabe he raped you"</p><p>Gabriel was slightly taken back "You're not mad?"</p><p>"No-..of course not baby" Sam stroked his hair as he knelt by the Gabe's bed side "Go to sleep..we'll talk in the morning"</p><p>Gabriel nodded off quickly and Sam pressed a soft kiss to his forehead before he stood and taking a moment to register what had just happened and decided it was best to sleep on the couch, to give Gabe some space</p><p>~</p><p>The next morning when Gabriel was sobered up, he woke alone in bed- he cleaned himself up and changed into something comfortable and made his way to the living room</p><p>On his way downstairs he saw Sam was sleeping on the couch, he sighed and Sam heard his footsteps slowly waking up, "Morning"</p><p>"You slept on the couch?" Gabriel shook his head softly "You didn't have to do that''</p><p>"I didn't want to make you uncomfortable"</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>Sam frowned "You don't remember?" He asked "..Gabe you told me you were raped"</p><p>Gabe took a deep breath "So that wasn't a dream.."</p><p>"When did it happen?"</p><p>Gabe sat down "Freshman year- a few months after me and Dean got here" Gabe explained "I didn't want to tell you over the phone"</p><p>Sam winced remembering something that looked completely different to him now "..did I make you?- the other day- did you <em>want</em> to have sex with me?-" He tried to ask, he thought back to the way Gabriel was acting, all jittery and nervous he had no idea how much that night mean't to his boyfriend, not to mention the fact that he had been very demanding at the start</p><p>Gabriel shook his head "No-I wanted that, but I am still trying to get more comfortable.."</p><p>"I won't push I promise"</p><p>"I know you won't Sam," Sam paused for a moment "..I know there are somethings you can't tell me but do you need to talk to someone?"</p><p>Gabriel shook his head gently "I don't need a shrink- I have Dean.. yeah there are just somethings I'm just not ready to tell you and he's been really helpful, last night I was freaking out about telling you" His eyes lit up a bit "I'm doing really good, I don't even have nightmares anymore"</p><p>Sam smiled "That's great Gabe" Gabriel nodded a little with a small smile "Yeah it is.." He took Sam's hand "I'm gonna be okay- I promise, you don't have to worry"</p><p>"But babe you see him everyday" Sam argued, he couldn't bare the thought of that monster near Gabe "Not really, he's a senior- and I just avoid him besides Dean makes me go everywhere with him"</p><p>Sam thought about it for a few seconds- Gabriel was his boyfriend he trusted Gabe right?- and Dean would always keep him safe...he wrapped an arm around Gabe pulling him close "I love you Gabe"</p><p>Gabriel smiled "I love you too Samosa" Sam gave a bitchface and Gabe giggled "Get it?" He said and Sam just rolled his eyes though smiling</p><p>
  <em>Yeah, everything was going to be okay</em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Brother Bonding</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A road trip</p><p>The first week of summer and Dean wanted to 'bond' with his brother, something Sam just didn't understand</p><p>So they'd gone camping much to the confusion of their boyfriends though both Cas and Gabriel agreed that it might be good for them since it'd been a year since they'd seen each other</p><p>Thankfully for Sam the last day of camping rolled around quickly and they packed their things piling them into the impala</p><p>It's not that he didn't like hanging out with his older brother but the whole trip he felt like there was a reason (other than the bullshit one Dean came up with) that he was taken on the trip</p><p>They'd reminisced about their childhoods and how every year since Sam turned eleven their dad them and Michael hunting</p><p>Just..a part of Sam was waiting for the other shoe to drop</p><p>And then it did</p><p>They were in the impala driving back home, when about an hour into the drive the impala stopped "No" Sam groaning "Oh c'mon!"</p><p>"Hey don't yell at her!" Dean exclaimed, "He didn't mean it baby" He stroked the wheel and Sam's eyes bugged "Dean!- we are stuck in the middle of the road!"</p><p>Dean rolled his eyes "We're not stuck okay?- I can fix her up in no time"</p><p>Sam rolled his eyes "Dean!" He eyed his brother, huffing loudly "Why did you have to make us go camping?- you hate camping!- you think it's for hippies!" He said frustratedly</p><p>"Because I wanted your blessing!" Dean exclaimed, "My blessing?" Sam repeated "What the hell are you talking about?" He deflated into the seat</p><p>Dean sighed..better now then never right? "...I'm dropping out of Stanford soon..I'm gonna join the army rangers boot camp"</p><p>Sam blinked slightly taken back "Oh..you were serious about that?"</p><p>Dean nodded "Yeah I was" Sam chewed his lip "I don't know what to say- I'm gonna miss you"</p><p>"I won't be gone for a while so you can miss me then"</p><p>"Do mom and dad know?" Sam asked quietly and Dean nodded "Yeah I told them last week...so does Cas...and Gabriel.."</p><p>"Gabriel knew?!" Sam exclaimed, "I didn't tell him he just kinda..<em>found out</em>"</p><p>"So basically everyone knew except for me?"</p><p>"Because Sammy I knew how hard it was gonna be to tell you" He said "You're my little brother..I might not be here for your graduation- and when you obviously pass the bar...I'm gonna miss it" He reached into his pocket pulling out the box he had the engagement ring inside and showing Sam the ring </p><p>Sam eyed it "Dean..are you about to propose to me?" </p><p>Dean rolled his eyes "It's for Cas" Sam blinked "Dean it's beautiful..you're gonna propose to him?" </p><p>Dean nodded "And when I get back I'm gonna marry him and I want you to be my bestman- y'know stop me from any dumbass doubt I might have" </p><p>"Of course I'll be your bestman" Sam said sincerely, and Dean sighed in relief sitting back in his seat "He's gonna say yes, y'know?- it's gonna suck being away from you but the whole year you and Gabe were gone Cas didn't even so much as look at another person the way he looks at you" </p><p>Dean grinned "I know" </p><p>They were both silent for a few moments when Sam spoke up "...De?" </p><p>Dean frowned Sam hadn't called him that in years- since they were just kids; when he was two Sam couldn't say Dean so he said 'De' the only person who still called him that was Gabriel as a stupid nickname "Yeah?" </p><p>"Can I..can tell you something, serious?" </p><p> Dean nodded "..what is it?"</p><p>"I..I got.." He took a moment "I was raped"</p><p>"What?" Dean's look darkened "What Sammy when-?" Sam sighed "Four years ago"</p><p>Dean did that math in his head "Four years..you were..fifteen Sam"</p><p>"Yeah..."</p><p>~</p><p>
  <em>4 years ago</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sam walked into the party, not really sure what he was even doing there, his girlfriend Jess was out of town making him lonely and bored out of his mind so his friend Brady dragged him to a stupid party senior rich girl Toni Bevel was throwing because her parents were gone</em>
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  <em>His eyes wandered around the room watching the teens dance and raise their alcohol levels- it all seemed so cliché, he fought the urge to roll his eyes</em>
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  <em>"Dude!" Brady called "Un- pucker man- have some fun!"</em>
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  <em>Sam sighed "Brady this really isn't my scene-"</em>
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  <em>"Sam..- you're doing it agian" Brady said "Stop putting on the breaks just because Jess isn't here doesn't mean you can't have fun"</em>
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  <em>Sam scoffed wanting to argue but decided against it "..Fine" He muttered and Brady led him to the drinks</em>
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  <em>"Brady" A girl said walking up to them "I don't remember inviting you here" Sam noticed her accent and though he had never formally met her assumed she was Toni Bevel</em>
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  <em>Brady shrugged "Well, you know me- I'm a dare devil and all that" She rolled her eyes before raking them over Sam, "And who is this?"</em>
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  <em>"Sam- and he's off limits Bevel, so don't even-"</em>
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  <em>"Oh hush- Brady" She silenced him "I think your friend here needs a drink"</em>
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  <em>Sam shook his head in protest "Oh, I don't drink"</em>
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  <em>"Well there's always a time for firsts" She remarked, "Don't go anywhere, I'll grab the good stuff" </em>
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  <em>Brady chewed on his solo cup as he had a staring contest with a girl that was eyeing him suggestively across the room, he turned to Sam "You good bro because-"</em>
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  <em>Sam waved him off with a scoff "Just go"</em>
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  <em>Brady beamed with a quick smooch to Sam's cheek he was lost in the crowd</em>
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  <em>Sam waited patiently for Toni, it didn't take long before she came back- two red solo cups in hand she gave one to Sam "Thanks"</em>
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  <em>She carefully watched him take a sip "..So Brady mentioned that you're taken huh?"</em>
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  <em>Sam nodded "Yeah I have a girlfriend-she's not here right now though" Sam drank down some more of the stuff Toni gave him, it tasted weird but then again it was alcohol "- Hey it's a little loud in here don't you think?"</em>
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  <em>"Yeah it is"</em>
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  <em>"Let's go somewhere..more quiet" She suggested and Sam nodded letting her lead him past the herd of teens and up the stairs</em>
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  <em>Suddenly his head began to spin and he almost fell back on the steps "Woah you okay?"</em>
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  <em>He blinked a few times trying to regain consciousness "Yeah- I'm just a little dizzy, no big deal"</em>
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  <em>Toni shrugged hiding the smirk on her face "If you insist" She muttered and they continued to her room but when they got there he'd just felt worse</em>
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  <em>"Hey T-Toni I think I need to lay down- my head is spinning" He mumbled clutching his head, the room was blurry and so was she but he didn't miss the next few moments</em>
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  <em>"It's okay just sit down" She cooed and pushed him into a sitting position on her bed, she climed on top of him kissing his mouth and jawline he shook his head- no "Toni- stop, I don't- want, I have a girlfriend" He panted breathlessly</em>
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  <em>Toni did stop, she stood up and Sam thought she was leaving but she just closed the door shut and locked it "She won't ever know will she?"</em>
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  <em>Sam spluttered "-Stop!" He yelled but soon realised he words weren't coming out, he tried again but to no avail- she rid him of his pants and pulled down his boxers climbing on top of him</em>
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  <em>He wanted to scream- tell her to stop but his body wouldn't allow it, as she continued he didn't really feel much of anything just the tears that rolled down his face as she had her way with him</em>
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  <em>T</em>
  <em>he rest came in bits and pieces mostly her moaning over his body, when she'd finally stopped he fell asleep and woke the next day fully clothed not knowing what the hell had happened</em>
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  <em>He got himself up off from the bed he had been sleeping on just as Toni pulled herself out from the bathroom she was half naked and Sam could only assume the worst "Did we-"</em>
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  <em>She chuckled softly- Sam was sure when they first met he'd never seen her laugh but it sounded so familiar "No- you crashed, we didn't do anything" She answered him as she pulled her blonde her into a bun</em>
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  <em>"Okay- sorry about that, I don't really know what happened"</em>
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  <em>"Alcohol can do that to you" She said "Your friend's probably passed out downstairs- a lot of people are"</em>
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  <em>She opened they door for him and Sam headed out- but not before she muttered "I had a great time last night, Sam Winchester for such a young kid you have impeccable stamina"</em>
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  <em>He frowned having no idea what that had mean't, he found Brady sprawled on the couch and yanked him up to get them home</em>
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  <em>-</em>
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  <em>A few days later Sam was asleep when these images flashed in his head, of him and Toni- her on top of him...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He woke abruptly sweating and panting hard- what the hell kind of dream was that?!</em>
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  <em>He shook it off and willed himself back to sleep, but they kept coming each one more vivid than the last- they didn't feel like dreams anymore but memories from the party he'd been to days earlier</em>
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  <em>When he slept it was like he was helpless again- all drugged up for that girl to use him as she pleased- soon he stopped sleeping and eventually eating, when Jess came back he couldn't- kiss or touch her, not like he used to</em>
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  <em>Eventually- his and Jess' relationship slowly started to fall apart- with her cheating on him repeatedly because he refused to have sex or tell her what was wrong</em>
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  <em>He never told anyone what happened- just kept his mouth shut and cried himself to sleep for months every night..</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>"When I was around you..mom..dad I kept it in..I didn't tell <em>anyone</em>" Sam shrugged tiredly "I know I should've told you- I should've.." Sam tried to get out "-I'm broken- she broke me..and I let her"</p><p>Dean searched for the right words to say "Sammy..it's not- you're not broken..."</p><p>"-Gabriel says it's not my fault..I want to believe that, I really do- but..I can't, not yet"</p><p>"..Gabriel knows?"</p><p>Sam nodded, "Yeah I told him when we were in highschool" He looked at his brother "Don't tell Michael- or mom and dad..please- it took me four years to tell you and I'm not even close to ready to telling them"</p><p>Dean nodded "I won't, I promise" </p><p>Sam sighed "I'm sorry I was such a jerk about this whole thing..if I'm being honest I guess I kind of needed it"</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>"Gabe told me what happened when we are apart and we're still trying to..figure everything out" </p><p>"Sam..look I wanted to tell you I did-"</p><p>"Dean it wasn't your secret to tell, really it's okay"</p><p>"I still feel like a dick though" He sighed "Well, c'mon let's go fix my baby"</p><p>"<em>Let's</em><em>?</em>- no thank you"</p><p>Dean looked at his brother "Sam get your ass out the car" He said "If you're going to inherit my baby you need to know how to fix her"</p><p>"You're giving me your car?"</p><p>"First of all she has a name and <em>second</em> yes- well shared custody with Cas, I don't trust Gabe"</p><p>Sam caved "Fine"</p><p>So they drank beer while Sam tried to understand how to work the impala, and for the first time that whole trip he was actually having fun</p><p>"Hey Dean?" Sam asked sleepily as he layed against the window, when they were finally back on the road "Yeah, Sammy?"</p><p>"Can we do this again?..before you leave?- just the two of us?"</p><p>Dean nodded "Sure thing Sammy" </p><p>-</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Impromptu Proposal</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is just pt1 but enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>Cas chuckled as he was led into his and Dean's bedroom, his legs tightly wrapped around his boyfriends lower back</p><p>"Dean!" He laughed "Gabriel and Sam-"</p><p>"-Are not here" Dean shut the door locking it behind him before capturing Cas' lips once more "Which means we can be as loud as we want"</p><p>"I am going to make you scream" He whispered nibbling on his angels ear</p><p>Dinner had been nice, rather than awkward it was fun and the happily got to catch up on the whole year while Dean managed to hide his extreme nervousness</p><p>They'd gone for a walk and since Cas had lived in California before he was an excellent guide and luckily Dean had got Sam and Gabriel to leave the apartment for an extra hour and a half so that he could have Cas all to himself</p><p>Dean layed Cas down in the middle of the bed making sure his boyfriend comfortable</p><p>Dean pulled off Castiel's shirt and kissed him, a hand slowly going to the waistband of Cas' boxers "Can I..?"</p><p>Cas nodded kissing Dean again, Dean's hand slipped into the boxers gently fingering Cas making his boyfriend moan, he used to fingers to gently fuck him grinning slightly at how wet Cas was "D-Dean stop teasing, please"</p><p>But Dean kept going "Sssh..I'm gonna make you feel so good Cas" He hooked his fingers up and- "Dean!" Cas tried desperately to shut his legs as he was practically <em>dripping</em></p><p>"Okay, okay angel" Dean pulled down Cas' pants as well as shorts and reached over for a condom and lube, rolling it over his cock and jerking himself to full hardness with the lube, "Wait- I want, to be on top"</p><p>Dean shrugged "Okay- yeah" They switched positions and Cas teased the slit of his entrance with Dean's fat cock before finally using his hand to slowly slip it in leaning his head back "Oh..<em>oh</em>" Cas was smooth all over</p><p>"You okay?" Dean asked and Cas nodded "Yeah," He placed his palms flat on Dean's chest and expertly rode his ass back on Dean's cock, Dean moaned with Cas at the warm heat around him- he hadn't topped in years, always wanting to be bottom when he dated guys but it didn't matter to him with how Cas was bouncing on his cock</p><p>Cas screamed when Dean's dick hit his g-spot "Fuck!- Dean!- oh!" He spasmed in the cock inside him and Dean decided to switch it up once again, he pulled out and turned Cas over on his stomach slipping back inside easily "Dean, <em>yes</em>" Cas encouraged moaning loudly as Dean fucked him</p><p>Dean gripped Cas' waist thrusting relentlessly chasing after both their orgasms, Cas spread his thighs trying to wrap his legs around Dean's back for more</p><p>Cas grabbed the pillow before him and yelled into it at how Dean was nailing his spot, he whined <em>"Dean"</em></p><p>
  <em>"Yeah angel?"</em>
</p><p>"'M so..close!" Cas warned him and seconds later Dean was slowing down his thrusts and they both came, he rode it out with a few more works of his hips "Cas?-you okay?"</p><p>Cas nodded "Yes, <em>fuck</em> yes" Dean slowly pulled out of Cas making both men groan</p><p>Cas rolled over onto his back and Dean tossed the condom before joining him "Did you..?"</p><p>Cas chuckled "Yes, I did" He looked at Dean "Twice"</p><p>Dean's eyes widened slightly <em>"Twice?"</em></p><p>"Yup- I guess you really know your way around my body"</p><p>"I didn't think I'd be that good-it's just I prefer being on the bottom" Dean admitted, Cas frowned "Why didn't you say so?- you do know that I own several dildos- and I'm pretty good at using them"</p><p>Dean blushed "Well maybe next time" Cas kissed him "Definitely" He grabbed his boxers and slipped them back on sliding off the bed "Where are you going?" Dean asked</p><p>"The bathroom" Cas answered simply, Dean watched him walk inside the room and then he got his shorts on quickly reaching over to the bedside drawer and pulled out a little velvet blue box, flipping it open and staring at the stunning blue diamond ring inside</p><p>His eyes flickered over to the door and he closed the box</p><p>Cas stepped out of the bathroom with a toothbrush in his mouth running a hand through his messy sex hair when he turned to close the door he stumbled back slightly at the sight in front of him</p><p>"Will you marry me?"</p><p>Cas' eyes widened "Huh?" Was all that came out his mouth and it was mostly a confused hum</p><p>He ran back into the bathroom to wash his mouth, when he came back out he was still confused as heck "I'm sorry- <em>what</em> did you say?"</p><p>Dean was now sitting on the bed, ring box still in hand "I asked you to marry me" Dean repeated, "Dean I get that the sex was good but-"</p><p>"No Cas listen, I've been wanting to ask you for a while" Dean started "I'm leaving soon and I want us to be engaged before I do- I know it's a lot to ask because it's so out of the blue but-"</p><p>"Yes"</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"Yes I will marry you"</p><p>Dean tried to stall his smile "You're sure?- 'cause you don't have to just for my sake, waiting for me isn't an easy thing to do, I mean this isn't just a year"</p><p>Cas sat with him "I know, I've been thinking about it ever since you told me and I'm okay with it" He sighed "I want to marry you, so <em>yes</em>"</p><p>Dean smiled brightly and gave Cas a short kiss before slipping the ring onto his finger "Wow it's beautiful" He gawked at the ring "This looks really expensive- you didn't have to go all out-"</p><p>"I wanted to, besides it matched the color of your eyes" He met Cas' eyes "Y'know I had this whole speech planned but I was so nervous I just forgot but- I love you, and I want you to know that even though I'm not going to be around much- I'm going to keep loving you- even when we're miles apart"</p><p>Cas blinked rapidly, "You're gonna make me cry- Dean I don't want to cry" Dean chuckled and let Cas bury his face into his shoulder "I really am gonna miss you"</p><p>Dean kissed him on the head "I gonna miss you too- but not for the next three months"</p><p>~</p><p>Gabriel cracked one of his eyes open to the sound of soft moans and Sam's ass grinding back on his crotch, he knew what it mean't, his boyfriend was horny</p><p>Sam obviously respected Gabriel's boundaries after he found out about what happened so this was more than a surprise but he didn't really blame Sam's sleeping subconscious, he was a red blooded eighteen year old male who's hormones were all over the place "Sam?" </p><p>"Mmph?" Sam groaned back until he realised that his dick was rock hard and he had been grinding on his boyfriend "Shit-Gabe I am so sorry-"</p><p>"Don't move" Gabriel ordered just before Sam could turn around, Sam froze at Gabriel's deeply authoritive voice, he pushed himself against Sam's ass making his boyfriend gasp, "Gabe..I want to.." Sam panted "I want you inside.." He rolled over onto his back and pulled Gabriel on top of him</p><p>Gabriel kissed him slow, building up to the main course, he felt up Sam's sides and rubbed his already hard cock</p><p>
  <em>"Gabriel"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel just melted at that, Sam moaned so pretty especially when his eyes fluttered shut and his lips fell open</p><p>Sam vaguely registered his boxers being pulled down, he watched Gabriel reach for the lube in the nightstand, putting it aside for a moment</p><p>He spread Sam's legs open, lubing up his fingers, he decided not to waste time by using two fingers to start instead of one</p><p>But just to be safe he did it slow until his two fingers were completely inside of Sam's greedy hole, "F-Fuck!" Sam yelped when Gabriel hooked his fingers up making prostate contact</p><p>"Gabe hurry"</p><p>"Patience Sammy"</p><p>"Gabriel I'm eighteen, if you don't get the fuck inside me right now I will jerk myself off"</p><p>Gabriel sighed "You're no fun Samich" He lubed up his dick and very slowly pushed himself past Sam's rim watching for Sam's facial expressions which were slowly screwing up</p><p>"Sam?- you with me?"</p><p>Sam nodded "Yeah I'm okay just gimme a minute" He waited a few seconds before giving and experimental roll of his hips to see if the pain was too much and when it wasn't he gave Gabriel the go ahead</p><p>His boyfriend started gently, trying to find a good rhythm within Sam, bucking his hips ever so perfectly</p><p>Sam moaned at the bit of prostate contact he got, finding Gabriel eyes he wordlessly pleaded for more and Gabriel gave it to him</p><p>Pushing Sam's legs apart even more so that he could fit through them to kiss his boyfriend all while thrusting faster and harder</p><p>He brought his hand up to Sam's chest using a finger to tease his hardened nipple before squeezing, but not too hard</p><p>But that was enough for Sam to break from there kiss with a loud unfiltered moan "Fuck!- Gabriel!" The sweet pain of having his nipple played with mixing with the pleasure of being fucked had pre cum oozing from Sam's neglected cock</p><p>"Again" Sam all but begged making Gabriel smirk, "Anything for you" He whispered before going back to playing with Sam's nipples watching them turn purple</p><p>He pulled out completely wanting to give all his attention to the one part of Sam's body, he scooted down and knelt between his legs to lazily kiss and suck at Sam's nipples</p><p>"Gabe..Gabe..you're gonna make me-"  He didn't want to come like this but the pain just felt so good and then Gabriel had to go and wrap a hand around his cock and he was done</p><p>It took at least a good forty seconds for his cock to stop squirting out come all over his stomach</p><p>Gabriel pulled away from him and smiled sheepishly "Sorry"</p><p>Sam gave him a look one might call deranged "For what?- that was the best orgasm of my life"</p><p>"Oh well then in that case I take my apology back"</p><p>"How did you know I would like that?"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged, grinning just a but "I guessed" Sam looked at his still erect cock, frowning "You didn't cum"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged again "It's fine-" He was cut short by Sam flipping him over and pining him to the bed- damn did Gabriel forget his boyfriend had the physical advantage in their relationship</p><p>Sam wasted no time in wrapping his lips around Gabriel dick, relaxing his throat enough to take him down to the base, expertly breathing through his nose</p><p>Gabriel yelped when Sam flexed his throat around him, sending waves of pleasure through him, Sam reached down to his stomach wiping the cum on his fingers and using it to circle Gabriel's hole before pushing in his finger and damn if that wasn't the hottest thing Gabriel had ever witnessed</p><p>Sam started to bob his head and soon he was adding another finger, making quick work in finding Gabriel's spot</p><p>"Sam if you don't want a mouthful I suggest you stop 'cause I'm about to come"</p><p>Sam pulled his fingers out and slipped Gabriel's cock from his mouth but Gabriel was already coming, some got into his mouth but most of it was all over his lips and cheeks </p><p>But that didn't stop his from licking Gabriel's cock clean before looking up at Gabriel, "Best morning ever" Gabriel panted staring at Sam's cum covered face</p><p>~</p><p>Dean woke up first, he turned to his sleeping boyf- <em>fiancé</em> and smiled, Cas looked so fucking peaceful when he slept- he kissed Cas on the cheek and saw him smile "..Morning" He muttered</p><p>"Morning" Dean turned Cas' head and kissed him properly on the lips, he smirked before he pulled up the covers going under them, Cas felt his legs being spread apart and his face went red "Dean.."</p><p>He jumped when his underwear was pulled down and Dean slipped his tongue inside him sucking and licking "D-Dean th-that feels good"</p><p>Dean gently slipped two fingers inside him and quickly made work of finding his g-spot "Oh!" Dean was moving his fingers and lapping at Cas' folds "De..Dean faster, <em>c'mon</em>"</p><p>At his fiancé's request he sped his finger movement, hooking them up as he moved, Cas screamed out and he was coming white onto Dean's tongue</p><p>He moaned lowly as Dean cleaned the mess between his legs "Mmm..fuck I love you" Cas pushed the covers up to see Dean's giddy smile between his legs "But I also hate you"</p><p>Dean came back up and kissed him "Is that anyway to talk to your future- <em>future</em> husband?" He dug his hand in Cas' deep brown hair as he kissed Cas' neck</p><p>Cas smiled "..I like the sound of that" He sighed<em> "Husband" </em>He giggled at the little butterfly kisses Dean was giving his collarbone</p><p>"So do I, my beautiful angel"</p><p>Cas rolled his eyes lazily "Why do you insist on calling me that?" Dean stopped the kisses "You really wanna know?"</p><p>Cas nodded "Yes"</p><p>Dean sighed shrugging "I don't really know, but it feels right" He smiled "Besides I didn't belive in heaven until I saw you" Dean ended with a cheesy pick up line making Cas gasp and the only thing he could think to do was grab the sides of Dean's face and kiss the hell out of him "Cas!" Dean laughed</p><p>"What-?"</p><p>"I'm stopping you from using another cheesy pick up line on me"</p><p>Dean laughed "You're blushing!"</p><p>"No I'm not!"</p><p>"So your face is just that red?" Dean asked raising his brow and Cas shrugged "It's a genetic thing"</p><p>"Will you lovebirds get up already!- it's like eleven am!" They heard Gabriel yell</p><p>"Welp I guess that's our cue" Dean huffed "Dibs on the shower- unless you wanna join me.?"</p><p>Cas smiled kissing him once more "I'll be there in two minutes"</p><p>"'Kay" Dean groaned as he stood and Cas watched him stretch out his muscles before advancing towards the bathroom</p><p>He looked down at the ring on his finger, staring at the beautiful rock before pulling it off and setting it down on the bedside table just as he joined Dean for a shower</p><p>~</p><p>"Uh- Cas?- what are you looking for?" Dean asked clutching his towel closed as he stepped out the shower, Cas had slipped out a few minutes before him but not before they had a chance to fool around of course</p><p>Cas was rooting through drawers "Underwear- I don't have any" He frowned pulling out panties from the bedside drawer "Um..panties?"</p><p>Dean flushed "Those are mine.." Cas chuckled dropping them back in the drawer "Yeah, I believe you"</p><p>Dean recoiled "What does <em>that</em> mean?"</p><p>"Nothing- but I wouldn't mind seeing you in them sometime- I love a man in panties"</p><p>Dean almost laughed at the irony, "Yeah Gabe said the same thing" Dean turned around and pulled some boxer shorts out of his drawer throwing them to Cas</p><p>"You don't have any briefs?- I don't have a dick Dean- walking around in these are going to be super uncomfortable"</p><p>"They're all dirty" Dean shrugged not thinking before he spoke "Well you could just wear my panties under them" His eyes widened slightly "I just- I mean-"</p><p>"That's actually not a bad idea" Cas grabbed the blue pair and slipped them on before putting on the boxer shorts with a content smile "Much better"</p><p>"Doesn't that make you..dysphoric?" Dean asked curiously, Cas shrugged grabbing Dean's faded grey -AC/DC- shirt "Not really- think of me wearing panties as a guy who likes to be feminine at times- it doesn't make me any less of a dude"</p><p>"So..say we were having sex and I-"</p><p>"Yes I would wear them for you Dean"</p><p>"..good to know"</p><p>"I'll be in the kitchen- might wanna put some clothes on" He gave Dean a quick peck before slipping out the door and running downstairs</p><p>"Morning love birds" He teased as Gabriel and Sam were sharing tender kisses in the kitchen, he walked past them to reach a mug from the top shelf of the cupboard evidently showing the panties hidden under his boxers when his shirt was raised, which Gabriel saw</p><p>"So you and Dean have nice night?" He asked, and Cas set his cup down "Awesome"</p><p>"Cas..is that an engagement ring?" Sam said eyes bugging as he caught sight of the pretty hard to miss- diamond on Cas' finger</p><p>"Oh..right, Dean proposed last night"</p><p>Sam couldn't hold in his gape "He did it?" </p><p>Just then Dean came stalking down the steps, placing a kiss on Cas' cheek "What's all the commotion about?" He asked casually</p><p>"You proposed to Cas?" Sam said and Dean simply nodded "Yeah- I did-I told you I was going to"</p><p>Gabriel turned to Sam "You knew?" Sam didn't have a chance to respond before Gabriel turned back to Dean "Did you get my brother pregnant Dean?" Gabriel questioned him only half serious and Dean scoffed "No-I didn't get him pregnant"</p><p>"Then why is there an admittedly stunning ring on his finger?"</p><p>Dean shrugged "I'm leaving in a couple months so when I get back for good -whenever that may be I wanna marry Cas" He explained and Gabriel backed down deciding that what Dean said sounded logical</p><p>"Dean that's great but are you guys sure about this?- long distance almost killed us and that was only for a year" Sam chimed in sympathetically</p><p>Cas nodded "Yes I have given this much thought Sam" Gabriel clasped Cas on the shoulder "Congrats baby bro" He paused "You know you're going to have to explain this to mom and dad right?"</p><p>The color in Cas' face drained "Um.."</p><p>"I already did it" Dean said, Cas turned to face him "What?- you asked for my parents blessing?" Cas turned to him "Yeah of course I did, they just wanted you to be sure it was what you wanted" </p><p>Cas' heart warned, he kissed Dean "It is"</p><p>-</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I would love some comments!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Impromptu Proposal (2)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Sam can we talk?- like super secret brother talk?"</p><p>Sam frowned at him "Dean are you okay?" Dean gave Sam a pleading stare and his brother caved "Okay- okay, let's go upstairs"</p><p>When they got to Dean and Cas' room Dean didn't say anything, he just..<em>paced, </em>while Sam watched in mild amusement before getting bored "Dean!- what is wrong?- you look really spooked man-"</p><p>"I did something bad.." Dean admitted finally slowing down to stand before Sam "Like really bad"</p><p>"Woah, Dean- what did you do?"</p><p>"I cheated on Cas"</p><p>~</p><p>Gabriel watched Sam be pulled upstairs by Dean and scoffed at them "That was weird" He turned back to his brother "So Cassie marriage huh?- are you sure that you're ready for that big a commitment?"</p><p>Castle nodded almost instantly "Dean is..different- we are different for each other yet somehow we're perfect..I've never <em>ever</em> felt this way for anyone" Hw shrugged lightly "I don't even think that love is a strong enough word for what we are..what we <em>have</em>"</p><p>Gabriel eyed him "How about soulmate?"</p><p>Castiel nodded after a while "Yes I think that works better" Gabriel smiled patting Cas on the shoulder "Well I'm all for this whole engaged at eighteen thing but <em>only</em> if I can be the bestman?" He wiggled his brows suggestively</p><p>Cas frowned "Actually I was going to ask Lucifer-"</p><p>"Cas!" Gabriel gasped dramatically and his brother laughed "I'm kidding- I'm kidding!- of course you're my best man Gabriel"</p><p>Gabriel smiled sweetly "Good because I did not want to have to kill Luci" </p><p>"Gabriel!"</p><p>"I'm just kidding Cassie!"</p><p>Cas sat down at the table and Gabriel frowned at him, his grin fading "Why the sad face?"</p><p>Cas sighed, tracing small circles in the marble table with the tip of his finger "Do you..do you think that my parents would be proud?..be happy for me?"</p><p>Gabriel sat next to him taking Castiel's hand as his brother began to cry a little, his parents were a sore spot for him "Castiel" Gabriel said softly, he rarely if ever called his brother by his full name "Of course, they would be so happy that you found Dean" Gabriel eyed his brother taking a breath "Y'know Luci met them once or twice"</p><p>Cas picked up his head "What?" He never knew that, "He was like six years old- they'd come over and your mother was five months along with you, they'd looked so happy, told Lucifer he'd have a little cousin soon"</p><p>"Lucifer had gotten into a fight with Mom about him tracking mud in the house and he asked your mother if she'd get mad at you for something like that"</p><p>"What'd she say?"</p><p>"That having a child was the one thing she never wanted to mess up, that she'd love you unconditionally- <em>no matter what</em>"</p><p>Cas' mouth hung open, his adoptive parents always told him how much he looked like his mother but they never talked about how his mother was before she'd given birth to him</p><p>"Cassie?"</p><p>Cas melted instinctively into his older brothers arms and Gabriel accepted the gesture hugging him back "I know buddy..I know"</p><p>~</p><p>Sam's mouth fell open "What the hell do you mean you cheated on Cas?!" He yelled in a hushed tone "You would never cheat on him!"</p><p>Dean shook his head "When we were on a break...I did something stupid"</p><p>"Wait Dean back up a second, just start from the beginning tell me what happened"</p><p>~</p><p>
  <em>A walk</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean Winchester never took those but </em>
  <em>after</em>
  
  <em>giving</em>
  <em> Cas that devastating call he </em>
  <em>hadn't</em>
  <em> been the same and </em>
  <em>it'd</em>
  
  <em>only</em>
  <em> been a few days</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Cas was amazing, Cas was his bestfriend in every </em>
  <em>sense</em>
  <em> of the word- Cas was his fucking rock, his beautiful blue eyed angel but </em>
  <em>Leo</em>
  <em> was </em>
  <em>Dean's</em>
  <em> first love</em>
</p><p>
  <em>His first time 'making love' Leo was someone Dean would easily call the best experience of his life and he thought </em>
  <em>he'd</em>
  <em> be okay when that was gone but his heart had just shattered </em>
  <em>i</em>
  <em>nto</em>
  <em> a billion pieces and he just wanted Leo </em>
  <em>to</em>
  <em> fix him </em>
  <em>back</em>
  
  <em>up</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Ever since he was fourteen, Leo was always coming round to hang with Michael and yeah that </em>
  <em>helped</em>
  <em> Dean develop his crush on the guy</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Like when he knew Leo was in </em>
  <em>Michael's</em>
  <em> room </em>
  <em>he'd</em>
  <em> walk by shirtless like the sneaky little teen he was trying to get something out of the older boy</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But then </em>
  <em>Leo</em>
  <em> left </em>
  <em>town</em>
  <em> along with Michael and </em>
  <em>Dean's</em>
  <em> crush slowly went away- hell </em>
  <em>he'd</em>
  <em> convinced </em>
  <em>himself</em>
  <em> that he was crazy for wanting Lee anyways</em>
</p><p>
  <em>So he got older and over three years, he dated, guys not so much </em>
  <em>because</em>
  <em> most were still in the closet gay dudes who he </em>
  <em>only</em>
  <em> went </em>
  <em>to</em>
  
  <em>second</em>
  <em> base </em>
  <em>with</em>
  <em> but girls he </em>
  <em>dated</em>
  <em> a lot of even found one he liked -a lot- until she cheated on him</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And then he bumped into </em>
  <em>Leo</em>
  <em> on the </em>
  <em>street</em>
  <em> and it was like the universe was gifting him with </em>
  <em>another</em>
  <em> chance</em>
</p><p>
  <em>So they hung out a lot until they kissed and feelings were out in the </em>
  <em>open</em>
  <em> and then they dated- </em>
  <em>fuck</em>
  <em> they dated and Dean was certain </em>
  <em>he'd</em>
  <em> found his other half</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo was possessive but not much, he was </em>
  <em>sweet</em>
  <em>- understanding and funny, cool and experienced (in the best ways)  and of course he was cute</em>
</p><p>
  <em>With his long almost </em>
  <em>shoulder</em>
  <em> length black hair and the black sunglasses he </em>
  <em>almost</em>
  
  <em>always</em>
  <em> wore  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He </em>
  <em>shared</em>
  
  <em>Dean's</em>
  <em> love of cars, and his love of Back To The Future as well as Indiana Jones and </em>
  <em>the</em>
  <em> Die Hard movies and he was authoritative which was just sexy but what was </em>
  <em>even</em>
  <em> better was his honesty.. he </em>
  <em>never</em>
  <em> ever lied to Dean</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean </em>
  <em>sighed</em>
  <em>, long and hard- finding himself before a bar, he contemplated </em>
  <em>going</em>
  <em> in for a few drinks but decided against it, Gabriel </em>
  <em>wouldn't</em>
  <em> like it if he </em>
  <em>came</em>
  <em> back </em>
  <em>drunk</em>
</p><p>
  <em>So he walked more- </em>
  <em>walk</em>
  <em> and walked until</em>
  <em> somehow Dean found himself standing before an apartment complex with his phone in his hand, held closely to his ear "Hello?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Dean?-" Came a tired voice, "I don't know what time it is in South Dakota but-"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I'm outside your apartment" Dean said cutting him off, eyes widening as he realised something "-I'm not stalking you or anything I just- I started college a </em>
  <em>few</em>
  <em> months ago and it happens to be in Cali so here I am.."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean only heard russling on the other end of the phone before he heard a window opening from a few floors up and Leo's head sticking out "I'll buzz you in"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And Dean smiled- he freaking smiled- that's what Leo did to him!- if he was a girl his panties would be wet at how his ex smiled back</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I can't believe you remembered where I live" Leo said letting him into the apartment, "Well I did help you pick this place out" Dean replied</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yeah well I just didn't think you'd remember" Leo looked at him, up and down- almost two years he hadn't seen the Winchester's face</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean looked up back at Leo, he had gotten older obviously though you couldn't tell, he still dressed in dark clothing Dean could see as the guy was wearing a long sleeved navy blue shirt and loose dark grey sweat pants "You cut your hair" He said finally "..You look good"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo smiled at the compliment "I try" He sighed "So what brings you to my apartment at ten pm?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean shrugged "I was taking a walk to clear my head" Leo laughed at that "Dean you don't take walks"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean rolled his eyes "I know I just needed to clear my head- and being couped up in my room wasn't helping"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo walked into the open kitchen, eyes still trained on Dean though momentarily leaving as he grabbed himself a beer "Wanna tell me about it?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I uh..I just broke up with my boyfriend" Dean said and Leo pursed his lips thoughtfully "And you came here for some post break up sex with your ex- boyfriend?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean didn't know why but his cheeks went deep red at Leo's mention of them having sex, "What no!" He squeaked before clearing his throat and trying again "No"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Well why'd you break up?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean glanced at him "Because I was dream cheating on him with you"  He stared at the carpeted floor "I didn't want to end it but I also couldn't be in a relationship like that when I wasn't even over you"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo set his beer down, walking back around the counter to face Dean "Dean-"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Fuck you Lee" He said but it didn't even come out angry just..tired "I was okay- I was fine and then you came along and I fell for your everything..I loved you and it hurt so bad but the good kind of hurt" A tear rolled down his face "Now it just hurts.."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo eyed him "Dean I get it...I miss you too" Dean would've laughed at that if he didn't here the quietness in Leo's voice, he picked up his head and saw Leo was trying to hold back tears- he'd never seen Leo cry</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Do..do you love him?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean nodded "Yeah I do" He ignored the wetness on his cheeks "Does he know about me?- why you broke up with him?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yeah he does"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo looked at him "I'm sorry Dean..you deserve to be happy-"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I was happy with you!" Dean exclaimed "I thought you were happy with me too"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Then Leo kissed him, and Dean wasted no time in kissing him back, pushing him up against the nearest wall</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Jumping into his arms, they kissed desperately and fuck- it was like Leo was the air Dean needed to breathe</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Just like Dean, Leo had fears in the back of his mind the second he got his lips on the other boy's he just wouldn't be able to stop, they made their way to the couch and Leo pined Dean down on the cushions</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean didn't even hesitate in shoving a hand down Leo's pants, already having a tight hole on his slowly hardening dick, "Fuck Dean- wait"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dean frowned for a second thinking Leo had finally come to his senses and was about to stop Dean when all his ex did was pull down Dean's pants as well as his so they were both exposed</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And with the absence of lube he gripped both cocks working them expertly, Dean chewed on the inside of his cheek, humming out his moans as Leo stroked him to full hardness</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It was fast and dirty and so fucking confusing but Dean wasn't about to stop the awesome hand job he was getting so he melted into Leo and held out until they both groaned, cum spilling into Leo's hand and some onto Dean's t-shirt</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Fuck.."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo pulled off his shirt to clean the mess, before laying down with Dean</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It had felt so fucking good but also so fucking wrong at the same time, because in the back of his mind he saw Cas..his angel</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Dean.." Leo started but Dean cut him off</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I know.." He turned his head and their lips were close, "I know.." He repeated "I love you"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I love you too Dean" Leo smiled sadly, stroking Dean's cheek with his thumb "But so does he..you should get over me and- get him back because he's your happy ending not me"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Why do you keep saying that?- Lee you were the best time of my life"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leo laughed "You give me too much credit" He kissed Dean once more, tender and passionate this time he lingered "We'll always have that"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>Sam blinked "You guys..?-you never told me he was here-"</p><p>"I never told <em>anyone</em>- I just wanted to forget"</p><p>Sam frowned, utterly confused "But you could've gotten back together with him-"</p><p>"Yeah I could've of but he wasn't Cas- Leo was right as much as I didn't want to admit it he was..that part of my life is over but it happened me and Cas weren't really broken up and I kissed him hell- I slept with him- I <em>wanted</em> him" </p><p>"Then you need to tell Cas"</p><p>Dean scoffed "And what have him throw the ring at my face?"</p><p>"Cas will understand- he loves you Dean, trust him to love you through this"</p><p>He watched Dean fold in on himself something he did when he got scared as a kid "..What if he gives up on me?- on <em>us?</em>- I can't loose him Sammy"</p><p>Sam stood hugging his brother "You can do this Dean"</p><p>Dean nodded "I can do this"</p><p>~</p><p>"Dean?- you've been quiet ever since we got back from dinner" Cas said, watching his fiance's face closely and Dean looked as if he was in deep thought "Hmm?" Was all Dean gave in reply</p><p>Cas moved closer to him, kissing his cheek "What's wrong?-talk to me"</p><p>Dean sighed "I need to tell you something..something important-  something I really should've told you before.." He took a deep breath "Remember when we were on that break?"</p><p>Cas nodded and Dean continued "I know we never said it but it was implied, no sleeping with other people" He swallowed, "..I went for a walk the night we broke up- I was so confused I had no clue what I was doing- but I ended up going over there- when I <em>knew</em> I should've-"</p><p>"Going where?-"</p><p>"To Leo's place"</p><p>Cas raised a brow "He lives here?- in California?" Dean nodded "I remembered where he lived because I helped him pick the place out"</p><p>"..what happened?"</p><p>"We talked at first- I told him about me and you and then about him and me and.. then we did things.."</p><p>"What things?"</p><p>"<em>Sex</em>..things- we didn't go all the way though- but it was more than I should've allowed"</p><p>Cas blinked "You did that with him?" He said slowly trying to process what Dean was saying</p><p>"Well he kissed first me but I didn't exactly push him away.."</p><p>"You could've stayed with him" Cas said, his voice small as he avoided Dean's eyes, "I know but he didn't want me too, our relationship was over and he wanted me to be happy with you"</p><p>Cas frowned "I thought you loved each other- why would he tell you to come back to me?"</p><p>Dean shrugged "Because he <em>knows</em> me.." He sighed "After that I took a couple days just to think about everything-" He smiled "And then we started dating again like <em>actually</em> dating there were no <em>ex's</em> being held over our heads"</p><p>"So you're certain you don't have those feelings for him anymore?" Cas asked carefully watching Dean's features</p><p>Dean nodded "I've only got eyes for you Cas" He sighed "But I understand if this is too much- I mean I've plated with your feelings enough but this?- if you want to take it all back I'll..I'll understand"</p><p>"Well I don't" Cas said after a moment "I'm not thrilled at what happened but I don't want to take it back..you didn't do it to hurt me I know that, you were confused though I guess I can't fully understand because.."</p><p>"Because what?" Dean repeated curious for the answer, "I've never been in love before you- I've never felt how you've felt for Leo before.." He shifted "You're right- we shouldn't be going into this commitment with secrets"</p><p>"You..you have secrets?"</p><p>Cas nodded "Well- 'secret'" He sighed "I..don't know how to love..before we met I was a lot like Gabriel..I slept around, I lost my virginity at fourteen.." He looked ashamed and Dean wanted so badly just to hug him and whisper sweet nothings in his ear but he let Cas continue</p><p>"I was so lost.." Cas hesitated and Dean could tell he was gearing up to say something hard, "Have I ever told you my given name?"</p><p>Dean shook his head, Cas never told him and he never asked not wanting to overstep boundaries, "Cassandra" He said "It was my grandmothers name, according to Chuck my dad said he thought it was cute" He smiled briefly "<em>His</em> name was Castiel.."</p><p>"My parents were killed in a car crash just months after I was born" Cas sighed "When I turned sixteen I found out that my parents had left everything they had to me"</p><p>"Everything that had?"</p><p>"Property- money-..like<em> a lot</em> of money" Cas blushed "It's in a trust that I got access too on my sixteenth birthday- I'm not one for spending and it was more money than I knew what to do with but it was all I  had left of them " He shook his head "When I first found out about it I cried a lot- beacause there was a letter too.."</p><p>"From my mom and dad about how much they loved me..and.." He held in tears "How they'd dreamed of having a child for so long..after that I stopped- the drinking and sleeping sound, I didn't want them to think they died leaving a kid who didn't care about their life"</p><p>"Cas I fell in love when I wasn't even looking for it- most people don't find love until they're older- sometimes they never do, you lost your parents before you ever even knew them" Dean shook his head "You're not a slut and this whole love thing is supposed to be hard <em>and</em> confusing"</p><p>Dean wrapped an arm around Cas "Are we going to be okay angel?"</p><p>"Yes, Dean..we are"</p><p>"Good"</p><p>"Hey Dean?"</p><p>"Yeah Cas?"</p><p>"I love you"</p><p>"I love you back"</p><p>-</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I would love a comment or two so I know I'm not writing for a dead audience lol</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Payback Is A Bitch</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy (almost) Christmas!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>
<em>"How are you and Gabe doing anyway?"</em>
</p><p>Sam reached for his fruit salad that sat in the back of the fridge, shoving his shoulder up to keep the phone to his ear</p><p>Sam nodded "Yeah, we're..we're good"</p><p>
  <em>"</em>
  <em>Uh</em>
  <em> oh, you paused, whats wrong?"</em>
</p><p>Sam sighed into the phone "..I just can't get the image of his hands on Gabriel out of my head- and I've never even met the guy"</p><p>
  <em>"I know I wanted to kill him too"</em>
</p><p>Sam shoved a piece of fruit in his mouth "..what do you know about him?"</p><p>
  <em>"Sam, no- don't go all Sherlock Holmes on me okay?- Gabe doesn't want to go to the cops-"</em>
</p><p>"I know- I know, just..Gabe said it happened in the janitors closet"</p><p><em>"Yeah it was near the </em><em>parties</em><em> dorm, why?" </em>Sam frowned "Are there cameras in there?"</p><p>
  <em>"I think so yeah, I don't know why I mean it's a closet"</em>
</p><p>Sam winced slightly "So there'd be a video of..." Dean sighed, realising what Sam was saying<em> "</em><em>There's</em><em> a good chance.."</em></p><p>Sam sighed "..What if we find it?- Gabe won't even have to be involved okay?-if we find it that's all the proof we need"</p><p>Sam really cared about Gabriel, and Dean knew he was going to do something about James whether he helped or not <em>"..are you sure?"</em></p><p>Sam nodded, "Yeah, I'm sure- I want him gone"</p><p>
  <em>"How do we even get the video?- it's not like campus security is just gonna give it to us"</em>
</p><p>"..We don't need them to when we know the best hacker in the world"</p><p>~</p><p>Charlie blinked again for the fifth time "..You want me to what?"</p><p>Sam sighed "Hack into the dorms security camera footage specifically the janitors closet" She nodded "..And you want me to do this why?"</p><p>Dean gave her a look "No questions asked- and we'll owe you..just please it's important" Charlie caved "Fine,"</p><p>She pulled out her laptop opening it, it took her a few minutes to get into the schools system- it really wasn't that hard, "Okay, is there a specific date you need me to hack into to?"</p><p>Dean cleared his throat "March 10th, this year" She sighed, and in just a matter of minutes she was done, and sent the file to Sam just like he'd asked</p><p>Sam quirked a brow "Is there audio?"</p><p>She nodded "Yeah, I made sure- why?, you want me to take it off?"</p><p>Sam shook his head "No- that's perfect thanks" He said "Just one more thing"</p><p>She frowned "What?"</p><p>"Delete it- from your laptop"</p><p>"What- why?- what is it?"</p><p>"Charles just please okay- like really delete it- don't even watch it" She looked to Dean and he had an equally serious face "Okay I'm finding it harder to trust you when you won't even tell me what I just helped you do!- and you won't even let me look at it!"</p><p>Sam's glare hardened but it was more cute then angry "No questions asked remember?"</p><p>"...Fine" She turned around in her seat, "Deleted" She said "-And you can't even hack back into it to check-"</p><p>She put her hands up defensively "I know I get it- promise"</p><p>~</p><p>When Sam got home Gabriel was in the kitchen baking, he bent down to say hello to Dickie and the dog barked happily "I missed you too"</p><p>His boyfriend heard him and spun around on his heels "Hey," He accused "Where's my love?" He gave a loving smile pulling out his ear buds, Sam smiled back- desperately trying to ignore the guilt he felt for keeping this from Gabriel</p><p>He gave a quick kiss to Gabriel's cheek "What did you make?" Sam asked leaning on the counter, "One of your favourites- <em>lemon bars</em>, I thought we could have some quality relationship time or whatever disgustingly cute couples do"</p><p>"Shit Gabe, I have to go back to the library-" He stumbled over his words- god he hated lying to Gabe</p><p>Gabriel silenced him with a finger to the lips "Say no more Winchester, it's okay- I'll still be here when you get back" Gabe smiled, and Sam leaned over the counter top to kiss him, soft and passionate "Your lips taste like powered sugar"</p><p>Gabriel flushed "Temptation got to me" He muttered and Sam chuckled softly "How did I get so lucky?"</p><p>"Oh, stop you're making me blush" He sighed "Well, if you must go- I insist you take these" He pulled out a container filled of freshly made lemon bars</p><p>Sam looked down at the delicious baked goods biting his lip "I shouldn't.."</p><p>Gabriel bounced his brows "But you want to.."</p><p>Sam sighed "I do" He moaned excepting the lemon bars "I'm so sorry- I promise to make it up to you" He reached over to kiss Gabriel slow and deep making Gabe moan with surprise</p><p>Gabe pulled back eyes slightly wide "Well I'm not gonna let you go if you keep kissing me like that"</p><p>Sam smiled "Oh I'll kiss you plenty later tonight- if you're up for it?" Gabriel nodded "Definitely"</p><p>~</p><p>The next week Gabriel was dreading his last day of school but Sam convinced him to go- promising him a lifetime of cuddles when he got back which Gabe was gonna hold him to</p><p>He was leaving his last class when he'd bumped into Meg and Lisa having a gossip like conversation "Oh- hey Gabe, did you hear?"</p><p>He frowned at Meg "Hear what?"</p><p>"Some senior got arrested yesterday, he's doing fifteen years"</p><p>Gabriel raised a brow "For what?"</p><p>Lisa shrugged "No one knows but it has to be bad like drugs or something" Gabriel rolled his eyes "And should I care?- we probably didn't even know him"</p><p>"Actually I met the guy once at that party we dragged you and Dean to, James Whittmore, I think?- the guy was a real douche when I talked to him, asked us for a threeway"</p><p>All the color drained from Gabriel's face and his heart stopped "I gotta go-" He ran off ignoring Meg and Lisa's confused looks and calls of his name</p><p>Thanking god that the apartment was close enough to the school he speed walked home, slamming the door behind him as he entered and locking it shut</p><p>"Oh you're back" Sam said coming down the stairs "Something happened"</p><p>Sam immediately concerned pulled Gabriel in my his waist "What?"</p><p>Gabriel managed to stutter out an explanation and Sam barley flinched "Gabe..I actually have to tell you about that-"</p><p>Gabriel eyes fluttered in realisation "You didn't have anything to do with it did you?" He pulled away from Sam's grasp</p><p>"Look I-"</p><p>"Oh please don't tell me you tried to kill him!"</p><p>Sam recoiled "What?- you don't want him dead?"</p><p>"No I want him to feel every waking moment of what I felt- no pleasure just <em>pain</em> and <em>emptieness</em>"</p><p>"Well we obviously didn't kill him"</p><p>"I'm sorry <em>'we' ?!</em>"</p><p>Sam sighed "Sit down" Sam said and started to tell Gabriel everything and Gabriel listened intently and <em>very</em> quietly</p><p>"..People watched me get raped?" Gabe his voice barley above a whisper "..You watched me..." God he wanted to throw up</p><p>Sam shook his head "No- they didn't..I didn't" He sighed "Are you mad at me?"</p><p>"No Sam- I'm not mad"</p><p>"Are you okay?"</p><p>Gabriel parted his lips to answer the question it he honestly didn't know how, a part of him <em>did</em> feel happy that he didn't have to be scared to leave his house anymore thinking that James would be around ever corner he turned</p><p>"I..think..I think..I need to be alone" He managed, feeling his heart thump in his chest, Sam wanted to protest but he understood</p><p>Gabriel was in their room for hours doing god knows what since Sam swore to himself that he wouldn't check on him, trying so hard to respect his boundaries</p><p>Sam decided to occupy himself with the library, burying his nose in a book, it was dark when he got home about nine pm</p><p>Dickie was fast asleep in his little dog pillow by the couch and Gabriel was still nowhere to be seen so he headed upstairs to check their bedroom</p><p>"Gabe?"</p><p>The room was dark and all he could see was Gabriel under the covers, he slowly and quietly entered, shutting the door behind him</p><p>He switched on the dim light enough to see Gabriel's face, Sam smiled softly, his boyfriend looked so peaceful</p><p>With a yawn Sam realised he himself was tired, he undressed and took his clothes with him into the bathroom to change in there after his shower</p><p>When he got out Gabriel had sprawled himself out on the bed like a starfish, he chuckled but with no sound, crawling into bed he held the older boy"s head to his chest "I'm sorry Gabe..I guess I'm just a little too overprotective" He breathed a light laugh "I know you don't need it but, I can't help myself" He kissed the top of Gabriel head</p><p>Gabriel eyes blinked open at the sound, Sam was sure his boyfriend would pull away from him but Gabriel just wrapped his arms tighter around Sam's middle "I love you Sam"<br/>
He sighed into Sam's stomach "Thank you"</p><p>~</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Sam's Secret Insecurities</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sam laid still sleeping in their bed, his big frame curled up in a loose ball, Gabriel watched his boyfriend with a pained look, he'd been meaning to speak to Sam about everything but he wanted to at least give him some time to maybe come to him instead</p><p>Things had been interesting to put it one way, after Dean and Cas got engaged Sam and Gabriel's relationship ran smoothly with it's occasional bumps but then all of a sudden Sam changed, at first Gabriel thought it was his fault but Sam was still genuinely affectionate with him so he got rid of that thought </p><p>Sam was covered in a large hoodie and thick sweats over the blanket -thank god for the AC or he probably would have been boiling- Gabriel sighed and quietly entered shutting the door behind him</p><p>He sat by Sam tucking a strand of hair behind his ear, Sam winced slowly beginning to wake- "..Gabe?- I thought you were with Dean for the night?" They were cramming for their last major test before summer break</p><p>Gabe nodded "Yeah I know, we finished early..decided to come back" He looked Sam over "You okay?"</p><p>Sam frowned "Y-yeah, why?" Gabe sighed "You wanna tell me what's going on Sam?"</p><p>Sam shrugged "What do you mean?" He asked nonchalantly, even though he knew exactly what Gabe mean't, he was just hoping to avoid talking about it</p><p>But Gabriel didn't back down "I mean you've been acting different lately..distant" Gabe said and Sam flinched, he sounded so sad "..Not to mention all you've been wearing are hoodies and sweaters, even when we're in bed you wear t-shirts"</p><p>Sam sighed "-You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.."</p><p>Sam bit his lip "It..It's not you" He said shyly, dug his hands nervously into the pocket of his thick black hoodie "I..just..I feel weird about my body sometimes so I cover it up"</p><p>He had body insecurities and he never said anything about it though he'd been doing it for years, he's a little muscular and on the skinny side and he's super tall which doesn't help, even though when they have sex or just in general Gabriel is always praising his body and telling him how much he loves it</p><p>Which does make Sam happy for sometime, feeling loved and protected but evidently he goes back to feeling depressed and numb, so that's why hoodies, sweatpants and anything else long sleeved or that covered him up were his go to</p><p>When they made out or had sex Sam just felt so vulnerable, even when Gabriel was so caring and gentle with him, treating him like he was glass even though he was this 6'4 being who could hold his own and throw some very good punches- and at eighteen at that, he felt ridiculous</p><p>"I know it's stupid-"</p><p>Gabriel shook his head "It's not" Sam sighed "Yes it is, to other people I'm perfect but to me I'm far from it" He whispered harshly "..So I bury myself in sweaters and hoodies"</p><p>He chewed the inside of his cheek "..Do you feel comfortable with me?" He asked, building up to the real question</p><p>Sam nodded "..Yeah I do," Gabriel leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to Sam's lips, Sam was surprised but he didn't pull away, Gabriel did and looked up into Sam's eyes slowly he pulled down Sam's hood and rejoined their lips, they kissed soft and gentle for a few minutes, Gabriel mostly took the lead but Sam let him</p><p>"..Can I?" He asked quietly and Sam nodded shyly letting Gabriel lift his hoodie over his head, he immediately felt too exposed and his cheeks tinted red</p><p>Gabriel didn't stare but he noticed that Sam had gotten a little skinnier "Sam?"</p><p>"..Yeah?" He whispered a little awkwardly rubbing his arm, "Are you okay with this?" Sam nodded "Yeah I am..we can keep going" Sam didn't actually know what Gabriel's end game was but he trusted his boyfriend</p><p>Gabriel nodded back, they began to kiss again when Gabe whispered quietly "..I want you inside of me" Sam swallowed, a little surprised- he'd never topped Gabe before, never even thought about it "What?"</p><p>Gabriel flushed a little "I want you <em>to</em>..if you want" Sam nodded awkwardly "..But slow right?"</p><p>"Whatever pace you need Sammy" He kissed Sam again "Feel like losing the pants?" He asked gently, "..Yeah, okay" Sam whispered, and laid back onto the pillows letting Gabriel pull down his sweatpants</p><p>Sam felt so vulnerable, which should've been weird because Gabriel had seen him naked before and they've had sex tons of times- why was this so hard?</p><p>Gabriel played with the waist band of Sam's boxers, "Sam?" Sam nodded shakily "..Keep going"</p><p>But Gabe didn't- not yet anyways, he quirked a brow "Are you okay?- you're kinda breathing hard"</p><p>"No, yeah I'm-..fuck" He was shaking and Gabriel noticed this, he quickly tugged off Sam's boxers, "Sam give me your hand," He said and Sam did almost instantly intertwining their fingers, "Sorry..it's just so..much- I can't.."</p><p>"Sam, breathe"</p><p>Sam took a moment and he felt his breathing slow down as he got a warm feeling in his chest, finally somewhat relaxing himself</p><p>Gabriel raised his brows "Okay?" He experimentally rubbed Sam's growing erection, and Sam moaned lowly "Okay"</p><p>Gabriel squeezed his hand, and took Sam into his mouth, he bobbed his head slow and Sam thrusted his hips up into Gabriel's mouth</p><p>"Sorry" He apologized and Gabriel gently stroked his leg silently telling him it was okay, so Sam let himself pull gently at Gabe's hair watching Gabriel take his cock so perfectly</p><p>"Gabe..that feels g-good" He whimpered kneading his fingers into Gabriel's hair and suddenly the warmth around his cock was gone as Gabriel pushed off Sam, he gave an apologetic look "Sorry..I have other plans"</p><p>"Okay, yeah"</p><p>Gabe grabbed some lube and slicked up Sam's cock with a generous amount since he wasn't stretching himself</p><p>Gabriel groaned "Fuck, that's fucking tight"</p><p>"You okay?" Sam asked concerned, Gabriel nodded "Yeah, yeah I'm fine" The feeling was tight because Gabriel hadn't been stretched, Sam hooked his arms under Gabriel's knees and began to gently thrust up, making both of them moan</p><p>Gabriel closed his eyes and bit his entire lower lip as he spread his legs more for Sam moaning quietly</p><p>Sam was nervous, of course he was- but..it felt good like really good, Gabriel's tight walls around him, pulling in his cock with each thrust</p><p>'<em>God </em>this must've been how Gabriel felt inside <em>m</em><em>e</em>', Sam thought but a small ask of his name pulled him from his mind "Yeah Gabe?"</p><p>Gabriel blinked lazily "I wanna see you," He whimpered, damn Sam hadn't even thought about that, he wanted to see Gabriel too</p><p>He carefully pulled out dragging a small whimper of loss from Gabriel before got Gabriel off him so his head was back against the pillows and he kissed Gabriel he first chance he got and Gabe kissed back just as enthusiastically</p><p>Sam fumbled to take hold of his cock and guide it back to Gabriel's hole, it slid in easy and Sam once again continued to bring the both of them pleasure</p><p>Gabriel involuntary clenched down on Sam's cock, he was close but he didn't want to touch himself and he was trying so hard to hold back, suddenly position changed again and they rolled over in the bed still attached as ever though now Gabriel was on top and riding Sam's cock with meaning</p><p>Both of them were sweaty and nearing their orgasams but that didn't stop them from wanting to attack each others lips, each kiss was sloppy but passionate</p><p>Sam brought a hand up to rest on Gabriel's neck deepening their kissing, and they lazily fell onto their side, but instead of getting back up Sam wrapped Gabriel's leg around his waist and held onto his ass to fuck up into him</p><p>Gabriel was surprised, Sam really was pulling out all the stops, and he didn't even seem to realise it, "Sam..I'm gonna cum" He managed softly</p><p>Sam was too he felt it, but nothing was happening, he literally could not come, he shook his head- breathing hard for air "I can't..-" He tried to explain</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Yes, you can" Sam shook his head, why couldn't he do it?- not even to make Gabriel happy?</p><p>"Stop..<em>mm-fuck-stop </em>overthinking it Sam..just let go, it's not about me okay?- this is for you"</p><p>So Sam tried, he took a deep breath, and he kissed Gabriel one last time and he let go, burying himself inside of Gabriel as he spilled his cum into the smaller man, he even grasped Gabriel's cock and milked him through his orgasam</p><p>And god it was amazing</p><p>Sam pulled out slowly and Gabriel grabbed his favourite butt plug from the drawer  and eased it into himself humming contentedly</p><p>"How do you feel?- any difference?" Gabriel asked after a moment, "Yeah, actually..I kinda do" He'd been disgusted to even touch himself let alone have sex for a long time</p><p>Gabriel gave a genuine smile "Good, for a second there I thought I put too much pressure on you"</p><p>Sam shook his head "No..you were amazing" He furrowed his brows "How did you know how to do that?" Sam asked and Gabe frowned "Do what?- have sex?" He chuckled a little</p><p>"Yeah..well, like...<em>that</em>"</p><p>Gabriel sighed "I spent most of my early drugged up teens experimenting, with a lot of different people..I was looking for something, that deep down I knew I was never gonna find.."</p><p>Sam knew what that mean't, it was kinda like sex therapy "I love you so much" He announced but Gabriel didn't say it back, instead he said something else that ended up sticking with Sam for years</p><p>"Y'know I like your hugeness Sammy" Gabriel said softly "..I know it probably sucks to be the biggest person in the room sometimes- but I like your size" Gabriel smiled "You're easy to find at stores and super intimidating even though you're a total softie inside"</p><p>Sam chuckled with a smile, "Sam," Gabe whispered to make sure his boyfriend was listening and Sam hummed a small yes, "This," Gabriel kissed at Sam's neck with his finger tips circling around Sam's hard nipple "Is perfect," He squeezed Sam's nipple gently and Sam gasped</p><p>"Your body is so beautiful Sam..don't let your brain tell you otherwise" Gabriel let go of his nipple and with one soft kiss to his jaw (because he was too lazy to reach up)</p><p>He grabbed his boxers "I'm gonna run you a bath, and then we're gonna eat icecream..I <em>really</em> want icecream" He elaborated and Sam chuckled "Got it" He smiled watching his boyfriend go</p><p>~</p><p>The next morning Gabriel slowly blinked his eyes open, he looked up and found Sam staring up at the ceiling, "Hey.." Came his hoarse voice</p><p>Sam looked down at him with a smile "Hey,"</p><p>"What you thinking about?"</p><p>"..You"</p><p>Gabriel hummed "Ooh, tell me more" Sam blushed and looked away for a second "Just..I was thinking about what you said yesterday"</p><p>"..And?"</p><p>"..I'm gonna try"</p><p>"You promise?- as hypocritical as this sounds I don't like seeing you hurting Sam"</p><p>Sam nodded "Yeah, I'll try" They both leaned up for a short kiss, Sam gave a warm smile "Love you"</p><p>Gabriel smiled nuzzling deeper into Sam chest, they started talking about something else when Dean abruptly opened the door to find them laying peacefully in bed, as the sun shined over them</p><p>They were both shirtless and had the fluffy white sheets covering their clothed naughty bits, Gabriel layed on Sam's chest and his boyfriend had an arm slung around Gabe as his other hand played with the ring attached to his necklace that sat on his chest</p><p>Dean's abrupt intrusion shook them out of a quiet conversation they were having "Dean what the hell are you doing?" Sam asked, head whipping to look at the door</p><p>"Me?- what are you doing?"</p><p>"Talking- why?"</p><p>"You're late" Dean looked at Sam, "I'm supposed to be training everyday!- we were supposed to start and hour and a half ago"</p><p>Sam sighed "Yeah sorry..I'll be out in a few" Dean looked at Gabriel "Cas, wanted me to tell you that your parents flew in last night- they wanna meet up"</p><p>Gabriel sighed sinking into the pillows "Great, <em>just</em> what I needed"</p><p>~</p><p>Sam walked out of the bathroom towel hanging low on his hips as he shifted through some workout clothes in the dresser</p><p>Gabriel sat on the edge of the bed palms flat as he leaned on his hands, watching his boyfriend get dressed; he just pulled up his boxers he took a deep breath "I think I'm gonna tell them-my parents"</p><p>Sam blinked as he got his shirt over his head "Like tell them- <em>tell them?</em>" Gabriel nodded nervously "Yeah about..everything" He said "-What do you think it's a bad idea?- because I can totally not tell-"</p><p>"No!- I actually think it's a great idea" Sam smiled sitting with Gabe "Are you sure that you're ready?- it's fine if you're not"</p><p>He played with Sam's damp hair "No I'm ready- moose" He giggled lightly "Your hair is getting longer" He chuckled pushing Sam's bangs from his face</p><p>Sam shoved him playfully "Shuddup" He said and grabbed his hair brush but Gabriel took it from him "Lemme do it"</p><p>Sam shrugged "Okay, but make it quick or Dean will kill us both" Gabriel smirked "Only way I know how" Sam blushed "That's not what I mean't"</p><p>"Whatever" Gabriel muttered and started to brush Sam's hair</p><p>~</p><p>Sam grunted yet again ducking another one of Dean's punches, he'd been happy to help out his brother with extra training but he didn't realise it'd give him flashbacks to when their father taught Dean, Michael and him how to fight as well as hunt </p><p>"Hey did you tell Gabriel anything about me?" Sam asked as they took a break in the gyms break room "No why?" Dean questioned unscrewing the cap off a water bottle "Did he ask?" </p><p>Dean shook his head, "Why?- something happen?" Sam sighed "I told him about me" </p><p>Dean didn't need an elaboration with the look his brother gave him, "Oh, o-okay- we're you doing it again?" </p><p>Sam scoffed, frowning at his brother "I wasn't ever really going to stop" Dean raised a brow "Why didn't you come to me?" </p><p>"Because it's embarrassing- it's been what seven years?- this isn't like the anger it's my brain" Sam protested, "Sammy, there's nothing wrong with you" </p><p>"Dean-" </p><p>"No Sam I need to say this, I'm not going to be there anymore- you need to let Gabriel or Cas <em>in</em>, you need to trust them like you did me and Michael"</p><p>Sam scoffed "Yeah and get sent to therapy again?"</p><p>"Michael was just doing what he thought was best- and it helped didn't it?" </p><p>Sam went quiet when Dean said that, "Sam- it <em>did</em> help didn't it?- you weren't just faking it for mom and dad?"</p><p>"No, it helped it did, but then I met Jess and I lost my virginity- having sex it brought it back I guess, at first I didn't mind- hell I <em>liked</em> it but Jess wanted to do it all the time and I convinced myself I was okay with it but over time I just got bored" He grimaced "And then Toni happened which just made it worse" </p><p>"Sam.." </p><p>Sam shook his head stopping Dean from saying whatever he was going to "I trust Gabriel with my life- it's not letting him <em>in</em> that scares me it's the if he'll understand part..what I did- I never wanted him to know, especially with what he's going through now he doesn't need my problems"</p><p>"But he has to know- I thought you two are supposed to be honest?"</p><p>"Dean just- no- okay?- I'll tell him when I'm ready to" And just like that the conversation was over </p><p>~</p><p>Gabriel took a long look at the restaurant, staring at his parents before he finally entered sitting down across from them with a shy greeting</p><p>"Where's Castiel?" Chuck asked, "He'll probably be here soon" Gabriel took a long breath "Listen- I have to tell you guys something"</p><p>"Something, I never wanted to tell you in a million years" He willed himself not to show too much emotion as he told them- he wasn't gonna shed tears for something that he had gotten over "..When I was fourteen, a junior- at school raped me"</p><p>He watched the look on their faces change slightly "He made me do some stuff I didn't want to- even though I cried and.. <em>screamed</em>..but before he could go any further Luci found me" He swallowed sadly "I told him not to tell anyone, so he didn't"</p><p>"Gabriel..." Becky was shaking- the thought of someone doing that to her son, even his father couldn't believe it " ..I'm sorry mom"</p><p>He couldn't even look his dad in the eye, "Does Sam know?" His father asked firmly and Gabe nodded "Yeah, I told him a while ago"</p><p>"And he took it...?"</p><p>"Great, he's been really nice and understanding" He put his head down "Especially after-..it happened again"</p><p>Chuck blinked "What?" He sounded angry, something he never got "I had no idea he went to Stanford, I just let him-"</p><p>His dad cut him off "You didn't let him do anything Gabriel"</p><p>"Yeah- sorry, I know- I know I didn't do anything wrong but I just keep thinking 'what if?'"</p><p>"Do you know who he is?"</p><p>His mom looked sternly at his dad<br/>"Chuck-"</p><p>"I'm not gonna let him hurt our son again!" His voice was a hushed whisper "Dad- it's fine, I'm fine- I'm okay..Sam and Dean took care of it- he's not gonna hurt me anymore"</p><p>Becky frowned "What do you mean they took care of it?"</p><p>Gabriel swallowed shamefully "..Doesn't matter look he's in jail now okay?" He took his mom's hand and gave a genuine smile "I am fine okay, it took a few months but I'm me again, same old Richard- Gabriel Novak- I just finally wanted you to know everything"</p><p>His mom smiled "You hate that name" Gabriel nodded "Yeah only because you guys didn't give to me"</p><p>All in all- the lunch was great, it was a huge secret Gabe had come clean about at it felt amazing, his parents didn't pressure him or make the lunch uncomfortable especially when Cas joined them they had a nice normal day and that was awesome</p><p>Gabriel pranced around the apartment in nothing but a large 'Straight Outta Cookies' tshirt and boxers, his blonde hair uncombed and messy listening to 'You give love a bad name' by Bon Jovi</p><p>He danced into the kitchen pulling out some milk from the fridge and pulling out freshly made chocolate chip cookies from the oven just as the front door opened though he didn't hear it</p><p>He pulled off the oven mitts and cooled off the cookies with the mitts, "Hey" Sam entered the kitchen, pressing a kiss to Gabriel's forehead "Ooh cookies-" He reached for one but his hand was swatted away "They're still hot"</p><p>Gabe looked up at Sam and was taken back, he gave an amused whistle "Nice shiner" He chuckled and Sam scoffed "Yeah Dean got me by accident while were training" He explained the purpling bruse under his right eye "Although it might of been because I made a comment about his aim"</p><p>"Aww" Gabe stood on his toes to kiss Sam cheek "I'm sure he deserved it" He poured a glass of milk and grabbed a warm cookie, taking a bite and mouthing along to the song as he headed out the kitchen</p><p>Sam smiled watching him go, he grabbed a cookie for himself, "So how'd it go with your parents?"</p><p>Gabriel frowned and turned down the music "Great actually- really great" He smiled faintly "They even asked if you were treating me right"</p><p>"Yeah?- and what'd you say?"</p><p>Gabriel gave a light shrug, but his lips were widened into a smile, "I'm not gonna tell you"</p><p>"What?- why not?"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged "Because" Sam stared at his boyfriend- half in awe and half adoration at the way Gabe smiled, he finally sighed shaking his head "I'm gonna take a shower"</p><p>"Have fun!"</p><p>~</p><p>Sam stalked down the steps, stopping only a few steps before he met downstairs as a thought came back into his head</p><p>
  <em>He had to tell Gabriel</em>
</p><p>Luckily for him his boyfriend had just gotten a phone call, but he didn't move just stood there listening in</p><p>"Hey Luci" Gabriel said bringing the phone to his ear "I take it you talked to mom and dad" He said calmly as if he was expecting the call </p><p>
  <em>"You told them" </em>
</p><p>"Yeah I did.." </p><p>
  <em>"It happened again?" </em>
</p><p>"Yeah it did"</p><p>
  <em>"Stop that Gabriel- why didn't you tell me?" </em>
</p><p>Gabriel sighed putting his phone on speaker so he could set it down and lie on his back on the soft cushions "Because you would've flown down and killed the guy" </p><p>
  <em>"Of course I would've because apparently my first 'message' didn't get through" </em>
</p><p>"Luci I'm okay, Sam has been helping me- he's been really supportive" </p><p>
  <em>"Sam" </em>
</p><p>Sam grimaced at Lucifer's tone, Gabriel chuckled "Why you don't like him?" </p><p>
  <em>"He just seems so different for you-"</em>
</p><p>Gabriel nodded, sitting up "I know, he's a boring eye rolling tall ass moose- but I <em>like </em>boring- eye rolling tall ass mooses" He explained "And besides he's not always like that, he's an adorable drunk and when he wants to he can be really fun..he makes me laugh- <em>amongst other things</em>- and I trust him with my life"</p><p>"That whole 'opposites attract' thing really does apply to us, and I wouldn't trade my moose boyfriend for anything" He smiled briefly and Sam smiled too, he'd never heard Gabriel talk about him to other people "So don't think I'm going to break up with him just for your sake- he is your boyfriends brother after all" </p><p>He heard Lucifer sigh over the phone <em>"Fine but at least promise me that you'll call every week- you're still my little brother Gabriel" </em>Gabriel paused for a moment before nodding his head "Deal" </p><p>When Sam heard the call end he took a minute to gather himself before taking the deepest breath of his life and heading down the steps, "Hey" </p><p>Gabriel smiled "Have a nice shower?" Sam shrugged join Gabriel on the couch "Could've been better"</p><p>Gabriel raised a questioning brow "How so?" Sam kissed him on the cheek "You weren't there"</p><p>Gabriel rolled his eyes though his cheeks told a different story "Real smooth Winchester"</p><p>Sam grinned "Who were you talking to?" Gabriel waved a dismissive hand "Oh just Lucifer, I was expecting him to call anyways- it wasn't important" He huffed "Enough about me- anything you want to get in?"</p><p>Sam's lips parted to respond with the answer that had been running around his head ever since he'd gotten back from the gym with Dean but they just fell back into a thin line and he shook his head</p><p>He could tell Gabriel some other time, right now they were good, and that's all Sam cared about</p><p>Gabriel looked at him reaching for one of the cookies that sat in a small pile on a plate on the coffee table before them "So, how are you doing?" Sam could tell that the question was laced with concern from what had happened the day before</p><p>He smiled "I'm great" But Gabriel was still eyeing him "What?- you don't believe me?"</p><p>His boyfriend shook his head "No it's just..it's been a while since you've smiled like that is all..I missed it"</p><p>Sam wrapped and arm around him kissing him on the forehead "Well you're going to be seeing it a lot more"</p><p>-</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Saying Goodbye</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This chapter is a bit lengthy but I hope you guys enjoy it</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>"For the last time Sam calm down we're not going to miss our flight!" Dean yelled at his brother "You're already making us get to the airport three hours early!"</p><p>Sam rolled his eyes "Dean just make sure you've got everything"</p><p>Cas turned to Gabriel "Are you sure this trip is a good idea?- we can spend Dean's last days in here in California"</p><p>"Or, we can spend them galivanting in <em>France</em> and <em>Rome</em>" Gabriel smiled "Only the best for my bestfriend" He grinned at Cas "And I saw you packed some <em>special</em> toys- looking to get kinky huh?"</p><p>Cas blushed "Gabe shut up- what Dean and I do in bed is none of your business"</p><p>"Whatever you say Cassie!" Gabriel sung, dragging his bags away</p><p>~</p><p>Location Paris, France</p><p>Gabriel was dying to go there first and Sam admittedly was as well, he'd always hoped his french classes would prove helpful besides a little vacation before school was just what Cas and Sam needed</p><p>Gabriel promised to be good all the way to France (per Sam's request) and he did just that earning a sweet kiss on the lips when they landed</p><p>The Novak's had a nice summer house that they used when they travelled so that's where they were staying "Wow" Sam had to gasp, it was big- like mansion big and it was stunningly beautiful and breathtaking</p><p>Pink flowers ran across the pool and just beside the house the garage showed two cars, just below the balcony where you could get the best view of Paris but the inside of the place was even better, nine bedrooms and seven bathrooms, a luxury kitchen as well as theater room and two cars parked in the garage</p><p>"You guys lived here?" Dean asked incredulously as they stood in the large main room, Cas nodded "Twice a year"</p><p>Gabriel beamed "Ah the memories" He looked around the familiar house, "Our mom had six kids to take care of but she still made time for every single one of us, doing whatever stupid thing we wanted to do" He looked at Cas "But Cas always had his nose buried in a book"</p><p>Cas scoffed "I was reading Gabriel- I like to read" He sighed "It didn't matter anyways mom always included me" He smiled as well, memories of Becky playing hide and seak with them or painting in one of the empty rooms until they were all covered in paint of all colors</p><p>"Dad was well..<em>dad</em>" Gabriel sighed "But we had fun nonetheless" He grabbed Sam's hand "C'mon I gotta show you to our room!"</p><p>Sam didn't even try to protest as he was taken up the long stairs, "Well I guess we should" He gestured to their bags and Cas nodded "Right"</p><p>They made there way upstairs opting to take the glass elevator, when they got there Cas took them to the room he used to stay in when he was a kid and Dean quickly announced that he was taking a shower</p><p>Cas huffed sagging on the bed as he sat down, something felt off and he didn't know what, he heard the water start and he decided he should at least unpack some clothes</p><p>He knelt down and pulled his smaller suitcase with him, unzipping it he started to sort through some clothes when he felt something under the soft cotton shirt he was in the middle of picking up</p><p>Sex toys, he'd forgotten that he'd put them there and an idea popped into his head, he bit his lip and looked to the bathroom door before back down at the toys before him- <em>what the </em><em>hell</em>-he thought grabbing the blue vibrator wand</p><p>He stood taking off his clothes, he got comfortable laying down on the bed, he rubbed between his legs dipping a finger into the slit teasing himself until he was wet enough to easily slip in two fingers slowly fucking himself with them</p><p>"Fuck.." He chewed his pink lips, thrusting his fingers in and out a few more times pulling them out and reaching for his vibrator, eyes almost closed but it didn't matter since he knew what button to press, there were three settings and he went with high which was no where close to how extremely high felt but he wanted to savor his orgasm</p><p>He held the vibrating head of the wand to his clit rubbing it and moaning out when his hips jerked down at the vibrations</p><p>Masterbation was something Cas had mastered young, he was different from his siblings, he was a geek a nerd he dressed in dark clothes half of the time but in a family of eight you were bound to find a black sheep</p><p>Cas didn't really spend money like his siblings did, except for essentials Cas' credit card was rarely used, at fourteen he started to notice people started to <em>feel</em> things</p><p>He'd read about sex before when he was younger and it had fascinated him, luckily his parents were gone most of the time and he was smart enough to order sex toys when he knew they weren't going to be around</p><p>Vibrators, dildos, he wanted to experiment and he did, effectively losing his v-card to Meg Masters at fifteen and despite his lack of the <em>male anatomy</em> she knew how to handle his body quite well helping him further his sexuality</p><p>"Hey Ca..<em>Cas</em>" Dean's voice died in his throat, but Castiel didn't notice his presence "Holy shit" Dean felt his cock hit the towel wrapped around his waist</p><p>Cas eyes fluttered open and he had the decency to look shocked though he didn't stop, he only turned the vibrator higher and moaned out, his back arching as he let out a cry<br/>"~Dean!~" Fuck he was closing in on an orgasm</p><p>"Dean fuck me.." God the whimper Cas let out was so fucking hot and how could he deny his boyfriend when he looked like <em>that, </em>chest heaving and forehead sweaty, his small thighs pulled up as the wetness grew between his legs</p><p>
  <em>"Dean"</em>
</p><p>Dean dropped the towel and joined Cas on the bed, "Cas- I don't- I don't have a condom-" Cas just shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut "Don't care- I'm gonna cum soon"</p><p>Dean nodded- <em>yeah he </em><em>could</em><em> just </em><em>pull</em><em> out before he </em><em>finished</em><em>, </em>he stroked his cock a little before using his hand to guide the head past Cas' slit slightly changing the position of Cas' vibrator</p><p>The second Dean entered Cas, fully bottoming out in his boyfriend Cas' hips violently jerked upwards, with a sharp- "Fuck!"</p><p>Dean took the vibrator from Cas' hand, turning it off and setting it aside, "What do you need baby?" He asked wrapping Cas' legs around him</p><p>Cas looked up at him with teary eyes "Need you to fuck me.." Cas almost never begged but he was so close!- he needed an orgasm and if sucking up to Dean was how to do it then so be it</p><p>Dean gripped his hips and started to thrust and just like Cas predicted it didn't take long for him to be on the edge again so he shut his eyes and gripped the pillow and waited for what was starting to feel like the best O of his life</p><p>In just a few thrusts his eyes shot open and he was cumming <em>hard</em> on Dean's cock, "Shit" He smiled, fuck he needed that</p><p>The afterglow lasted about three minutes until he realised that Dean was fucking him bareback with no condom- something they never did, and being pounded into didn't feel as good anymore</p><p>"Dean stop" Cas said softly but Dean heard, "Shit Cas sorry I-""</p><p>"Shut up and let me blow you" Cas said suddenly and Dean immediately pulled out, letting Cas suck him to completion</p><p>~</p><p>"Gabe this place is amazing!" Sam said as he was dragged up the swivel stairs</p><p>"Yeah?- you think so?" Gabriel smiled, "This was my favourite summer house" Sam stopped them "Wait wait- can we slow down for a second"</p><p>Gabriel frowned at him "Why would you want to do that?" Sam shrugged "Oh I don't know, maybe because we <em>just</em> got off of a twelve hour flight"</p><p>"And?"</p><p>Sam almost facepalmed- he knew he shouldn't of let Gabriel have that much coffee on the the plane, "And nothing just..nothing" He'd given up, quickly learning the best way to deal with a hyperactive Gabriel was to tire him out</p><p>Gabriel continued go take him all they way up the stairs and down the long hall of rooms into theirs,<em> "Bienvenue dans mon humble demeure </em><b><em>(welcome to my </em></b><b><em>humble</em></b><b><em> abode)</em></b><em>" </em>Gabriel said, the accent rolling perfectly off his tongue</p><p>Sam's brows shot up "You know french?"</p><p>Gabriel nodded <em>"J</em><em>e parle plusieurs langues Samshine </em><em><b>(</b></em><em><b>I</b></em><em><b> speak many languages Samshine)</b></em><em>"</em> He replied, knowing Sam could understand him "I had to learn how to piss of my siblings in more than one"</p><p>Sam shook off the disappointment he felt when Gabriel stopped speaking french and scoffed, "Of course"</p><p>Gabriel stood from the fluffy white sheets of the bed, reaching up to wrap his arms around Sam's neck "Y'know they say french is the language of <em>love</em>" He wrapped his sweatpant clad legs around Sam's waist</p><p>"Oh is that so?" Sam teased back, Gabriel nodded "And you my Samshine <em>sont l'amour de ma vie </em><b><em>(are the </em></b><b><em>love</em></b><b><em> of my life)</em></b>"</p><p>Sam kissed the wicked grin from Gabriel lips and they fell onto the bed, kissing gentle slow and passionately, they both moaned happily into it</p><p>Sam's hands strayed on Gabriel waist never travelling to his ass and Gabriel hands stayed cupping Sam's face, "As much as I love kissing you kiddo, I am <em>starving</em>"</p><p>He rolled off of Sam to plant his feet firmly on the ground, extending a hand "Join me in making lunch?"</p><p>Sam nodded "Sure"</p><p>So they headed back downstairs, ignoring their bags for the meantime and heading to the kitchen, Sam frowned when he opened the fridge "Wait there's food in here?- I thought you said no one has been here for months"</p><p>Gabriel shrugged "No one has, Balthazar owed me a favor- and <em>then</em> some" He did speaking of his cousin, "He lives somewhere around here"</p><p>Sam tried not to think of the time he had met the aforementioned 'Balthazar' the guy literally hit on him <em>right</em> in front of Gabriel, boldly proposing a threesome, "-You should probably get Cas and Dean" Sam said standing before the stove</p><p>Gabriel snapped his fingers "On it"</p><p>~</p><p>"So.. you're not mad at me?" Dean asked as they layed side by side, after his epic blowjob, "I kind of interrupted your...<em>y'know</em>"</p><p>"No- I just, you weren't wearing a condom, didn't want to take the chance" Cas explained, Dean nodded "Yeah we should really unpack"</p><p>Cas laughed "Yeah we should" Dean sat up on his side, cupping Cas' face "Y'know you looked really hot" He kissed Cas' cheek, "Oh?- did I?" Cas whispered back</p><p>"Shut up, you know you did"</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>Dean kissed him, "Would you do that again?- for me?" His hand trailed down to Cas' bare crotch, rubbing just above his clit, Cas looked down watching his hips lean into Dean's touch, he nodded "Yes..yeah, I would" He moaned</p><p>Dean looked at him through lidded eyes "Would you fuck me?" Cas nodded "How?" Dean questioned, trailing down kisses to Cas' pussy, "Tell me how you would do it"</p><p>Cas whimpered when Dean put his head between his legs, taking a little lick at his juices, "Cas?- I need an answer"</p><p>"I would..take off our underwear and..fuck!" Dean was full on eating him out, "-Open you up with my fingers, until you were able to take me-" He had no idea what Dean was doing, he couldn't <em>possibly</em> cum again could he?</p><p>"I'd fuck you slow first, and then faster, until you were a mess u-u-nder me" Dean smirked as the image actually popped up in his head, he licked faster, egging Cas to continue</p><p>"And you'd cum for me" Cas whispered, "So beautiful Dean" Cas moaned "Fuck!" He took deep breaths as he came for the second time that day</p><p>Dean cleaned him up fast and he popped up to look at him "Do you want that?" He looked nervous "Because you <em>can</em>..fuck me"</p><p>Cas nodded "Yeah, I know"</p><p>"Hey guys we were gonna-" Gabriel stopped to stare at the <em>very</em> naked two "Um.." He raised a brow, not really sure what to do in the situation "You guys having fun?"</p><p>"Get out!"</p><p>~</p><p>Gabriel practically ran downstairs and found Sam in the kitchen still tying to figure out the stove "They were naked" He explained panting and trying to catch his breath</p><p>His boyfriend gaped "We <em>just</em> got here!</p><p>Gabriel shrugged "Young love" Sam sighed shaking his head, "Still can't figure out the stove?" Gabriel asked with a chuckle and Sam huffed "It shouldn't be this complicated"</p><p>"Maybe we'll eat out today" He offered "Just as soon as Cas and Dean get their clothes back on"</p><p>Sam nodded "That's probably a good idea"</p><p>Finally Dean and Cas stalked down the steps and Dean was shamelessly buttoning up his shirt as they entered the kitchen "Really Dean?" Sam fixed his brother with a look</p><p>"Oh shut up- I'm human"</p><p>Sam rolled his eyes "So am I and I managed to keep my dick in my pants" Cas sighed "Don't blame Dean Sam, I..<em>distracted</em> him"</p><p>"I don't even want to know" Sam shuddered at the thought, "Why are we here anyway?" Dean questioned</p><p>Gabriel nodded "Oh right, lunch anyone?"</p><p>~</p><p>"Dean you're on beer duty!"</p><p>Sam was beginning to regret the decision of drinking his ass off, after lunch they'd decided to stay in, planning to us the day after to go out</p><p>The Novaks had a nice indoor theater and Dean convinced everyone to watch all three Back To The future movies, resulting in Sam getting drunk</p><p>Now Gabriel had never seen drunk Sam so he had no idea that his boyfriend was the 'cuddly drunk' but it was adorable how clingy Sam was</p><p>After a few promises and some good old fashioned Novak persuasion Gabriel had convinced Sam to go upstairs to get some sleep</p><p>"You're so good to me Gabby" Sam said affectionately as he was led through the hallway</p><p>Gabriel was thanking himself that he didn't drunk as much as Sam, "It's my pleasure Sammy" He smiled and all of a sudden Sam was pushing him against the wall just next to the bedroom door and kissing him sloppily</p><p>Gabriel chuckled at first but then kissed back guiding Sam's hands to him his hips as he slowed the kiss down "I love you" Sam whispered, "And I love you back baby"</p><p>Gabriel broke apart from Sam much to his boyfriend's displeasure and he led them inside the room sitting his boyfriend down on the bed as Sam began to take an interest in the lines on is palms</p><p>Gabriel chuckled once more before busying himself with getting a change of clothes for them from their bags, he got himself changed into some pajama shorts and a thin sweater while Sam did his best not to look</p><p>"Okay Sammy now it's your turn" Gabe said making his boyfriend groan "Why can't I sleep like this?"</p><p>"You can't go to bed in jeans- no matter how much you want to sober you will kill me for letting you do that in the morning"</p><p>"What if I distracted you?" Sam said slowly grinning "And how would you do that?"</p><p>In a matter of seconds Sam was wrapping a hand around Gabriel neck and pulling him in for and kiss, now Gabriel should've pulled away but he really couldn't</p><p>Sam had somehow managed to get Gabriel onto the bed straddling his waist as they kissed deeper, "You're doing a pretty good job of distracting me kiddo"</p><p>Sam smiled kissing him again "Thank you" Gabriel hands slipped up from where they were on Sam's hips to tug and pull up his shirt</p><p>Suddenly Sam felt his crotch grind against Gabriel's obviously erect dick still confined in his shorts and he freaked the fuck out "No!-Stop!"</p><p>Immediately Gabriel got the hell off of him and frowned "Sam?- are you.." He looked Sam over and the boy looked..well not good "Sammy?"</p><p>Sam shook his head lightly "I can't- not like.."</p><p>Gabriel realised that Sam hadn't been hard at all the entire time they had been making out and it's not like he <em>expected</em> sex but he couldn't exactly control his dick, "Tell me Sam" He offered gently and Sam looked at him "Not when I'm drunk" He explained "Kissing is fine but I can't even get hard- I don't like having sex when I'm drunk..b-because-"</p><p>"Of her.." Well now Gabriel felt like a dick "Shit..Sam I am so sorry-"</p><p>"It's not your fault- I should've told you" He sighed "It makes me feel powerless..-I just..can't"</p><p>"I understand Sam, it's okay really- no sex when either of us are drunk"</p><p>Sam nodded "Yeah, please" Gabriel kissed his cheek "C'mon, let's get you into some more comfortable clothes" Sam nodded letting Gabriel lift his shirt over his head</p><p>Once he was settled into bed Gabriel settled with him, hugging Sam close to his chest, "Hey Gabe?"</p><p>"Yeah Sammy?"</p><p>"Thanks for understanding" Sam hugged him closer "I love you"</p><p>"Yeah..I love you too Sam"</p><p>~</p><p>"Dean, wake up" Cas kissed his boyfriends freckled shoulder as Dean layed presses into the bed, face smushed against the pillow</p><p>"No..too early"</p><p>"Dean it's <em>eleven</em> am"</p><p>"Oh..still no" </p><p>Cas chuckled kissing the back of Dean's neck "You want me to fuck you?" He asked softly "Just like this?"</p><p>"..Yes, please"</p><p>Cas smiled "Whatever you want baby" He quickly got the strap on together while Dean patiently waited</p><p>He set the vibrator in the crotch on the strap on on medium, moaning lowly when he felt the humming pleasure course through him but he subsided his own needs so that he could focus on Dean</p><p>His boyfriend barley moved but he did groan when his ass was being split open by Cas' obnoxiously long fingers "Angel..fuck me" Dean whined out, sounding more needy than he wanted to</p><p>"Oh, Dean you know I always take care of you" Cas said as he began to press in the dido, Dean smiled into the pillow "Yes you do"</p><p>Cas couldn't help being mesmerised by Dean's ass, using a hand to firmly squeeze the flesh "Mm.." Dean moaned sensually, grinding his ass back against the thick plastic inside of him</p><p>Cas bent down to hover over him, his hands tightening on Dean's hips, he left soft butterfly kisses on his boyfriends freckled shoulders and back, upping the power on his vibrator</p><p>Dean hummed in surprise feeling the vibrator through the dildo, "Fuck that felt good"</p><p>Cas moaned mid chuckle, running his hand in Dean's hair, his boyfriend smiled at the feeling before Cas was yanking his hair and pulling him up forcing him onto all fours, speeding up his thrusts</p><p>"Cas faster, 'm close" Dean sucked in his bottom lip and his knuckles turned white as he fisted them in the sheets, rocking his hips back</p><p>Simultaneously after a few minutes of just rocking together in sync they stopped with muffled groans, Cas legs shook as he came panting softly into Dean's shoulder and Dean painted the sheets under his with his cum</p><p>"Fuck.." Dean grunted "We are definitely doing that again"</p><p>~</p><p>"You guys.." Gabriel started slowly "Got tattoos?"</p><p>Sam nodded "Yeah, to be honest at the time we thought it was a good idea"</p><p>"It was a good idea!" Dean defended, Cas huffed "I knew we never should of split up-letting you two run around France was a terrible idea"</p><p>"Hey!"</p><p>Cas and Gabriel ignored them "..Just please tell us it wasn't something stupid?"</p><p>Sam and Dean gave each other a knowing side glance and pulled down the necks of their shirts showing of their new tattoos</p><p>Cas frowned "..at least it isn't bad" Gabriel leaned in next to his brother  whispering "Is it just me or are you weirdly turned on right now?"</p><p>Cas shook his head "..It's not just you" Their boyfriends chuckled, "What is it anyway?" Gabe asked</p><p>Sam shrugged "Anti possession symbol- Dean thought it looked cool or whatever"</p><p>"It does" Gabriel took Sam's hand "I think I'm going to tell you how cool it looks in our bedroom"</p><p>Sam chuckled sending Dean a quick glance as he let Gabe drag him off to their room</p><p>Soon weeks of fun and laughs had passed, they traveled all over really, wanting Dean to see as much as he could, they'd even went back home- it'd been tearful but at least they'd gotten to fly back to Souix Falls to see John and Mary</p><p>The week before Dean was leaving had arrived and Michael was flying in to see his brother while he could</p><p>Dean stumbled back a bit at the surprise as he opened he door "Hey Dean"</p><p>"I'm sorry who are you?" Dean said deciding that was what he wanted to go with, the man rolled his eyes  "Dean- I'm your brother"</p><p>Dean shook his head in protest "See I used to have a brother named Michael but he's dead to me now"</p><p>Michael chuckled and pulled out a box that Dean <em>knew </em>contained a delicious pie "Am I still dead to you?"</p><p>Dean smiled, his ammnisa suddenly disappearing "Michael!- it's been so long, come in!" He exclaimed taking the pink box from his hands, letting him inside "So what's the occasion?"</p><p>"Um my little brother proposed to someone- I wanna celebrate"</p><p>Dean frowned "How'd you find out?" Michael shrugged "Sammy told me, why didn't you?"</p><p>"I was going to but I didn't really want to do it over the phone"</p><p>"He also told me that you're joining the service"</p><p>Dean scratched awkwardly at his neck "I-"</p><p>"Don't worry I'm not here to yell at you about it" Michael smiled fondly "I'm proud of you, my little brother wants to make something of himself"</p><p>Dean smiled back, "So where is he?" Michael asked with a sigh "Cas isn't here right now, he's with Gabriel and Sam- probably on their way back now"</p><p>"Hey Mikey- I told you to wait for me"</p><p>Dean's eyes widened as he turned around "Aah!- Lucifer!" He chuckled "What- what are you doin' here?"</p><p>Lucifer stood at the doorway, "Dean" He said firmly stepping inside, Dean never did figure out how to approch the eldest Novak with the news</p><p>Dean turned to Michael "Did you-"</p><p>"Tell him?" Michael raised a brow "No" He patted Dean on the shoulder "Have fun"</p><p>Lucifer eyed him carefully, "Tell me what?- Winchester?"</p><p>Dean took a breath "We should probably talk about this in private" He said and Lucifer reluctantly followed him upstairs into the bedroom</p><p>"What's going on?"</p><p>"Me and Cas are engaged" Dean blurted, "We're getting married- not anytime soon but we are..in the future"</p><p>To Dean's surprised Lucifer didn't look pissed just majorly confused but getting to angry "You proposed to my little brother?- Dean he's just eighteen why the hell would you do that-"</p><p>"I'm enlisting, I'm gone for the next two years, that's why Michael is here to say goodbye"</p><p>Lucifer raised a brow "You're leaving my brother?"</p><p>Dean wasn't going to beat around he bush, yes he was <em>slightly</em> 'afraid' of Cas' older brother but Cas didn't need permission to make his own decisions, Dean only told The Novaks because he knew Cas would want them to know "Look, I asked Cas over a hundred times if he was sure about this and he said yes each time"</p><p>~</p><p>"Michael?" Sam frowned as he,Gabriel and Cas entered the apartment to find his older brother seemingly sat waiting for something or 'someone' as he drank a beer</p><p>"Oh, hey Sammy" </p><p>Sam hugged him, still partly confused "Where's Dean?- and Lucifer?" He'd assumed his brother would want to bring his boyfriend along</p><p>"Oh they're upstairs talking"</p><p>"About what?" Cas mused and Michael stopped to look at him, he'd only met Castiel briefly before but now he had a chance to look at him- and really look at him at that "Blue eyes and dark hair" He grinned slightly "Just Dean's type"</p><p>Sam kicked his brother in the ankle and Michael sputtered "Sorry- sorry, just, we've never really met before and now you and Dean are engaged"</p><p>Cas nodded politely "I know it's a lot to process" He frowned "Why are Dean and Lucifer speaking?"</p><p>"Dean's just telling him about your engagement-"</p><p>"And you left him alone?" Cas' eyes bugged and he made a b-line for the stairs leaving the others to watch him go</p><p>He overheard Lucifer sputter something out in confusion and as he neared the partly open door Dean began to speak</p><p>"Look, I asked Cas over a hundred times if he was sure about this and he said yes each time" He heard, "Cas is young yeah, but he's smart and he is fully capable of making his own decisions- the fact that we actually discussed it before he said yes tells me that he wants to marry me, and I want to marry him too"</p><p>Lucifer nodded "Okay," He extended his hand for Dean to shake it "Welcome to the family"</p><p>Cas looked shocked as Dean accepted the hand shake and he and Lucifer looked at each other civilly, he gently knocked on the door to make them aware of his presence "Cas" Dean said</p><p>"Michael told me you two were talking alone, I assumed the worst"</p><p>Dean shook his head looking at Lucifer who nodded "No, we're good babe"</p><p>-</p><p>"Cas for the last time I don't need a parting gift" Dean said pulling the sheets up over them as he got into bed; he'd already been regifted the amulet Sam had given him for Christmas ten years ago, and he'd happily wear it but he didn't need or <em>want</em> anything from Cas- just being with him, the last few hours they had, was more than enough</p><p>"Dean just shut up okay?- and you're accepting this gift" Cas said firmly not waiting for Dean to protest, he pulled out a small lockbox and handed it to Dean with the key</p><p>"What is this?" Dean asked inspecting the box, "Open it"</p><p>Dean shrugged his brows and put the key in the lock twisting it to unlock it, he found several papers in the box, they seemed to be letters, mostly from Cas but he saw some were signed by his brother, Gabriel, Lisa, Meg, Charlie, and Jo etc "I thought maybe whenever you got homesick you could read them to feel a little better- most of Gabriel's are just silly though"</p><p>Dean felt a wetness run down his cheek "Cas" He breathed, "This is.." It was the most thoughtful thing Dean had ever been given and it genuinely took him by surprise "Thank you" He dropped the box to embrace Cas in a hug</p><p>He'd been trying so hard to be strong and not let Cas as well as their friends and his brother know how scared and sad he was about leaving them, but he wanted to, he felt himself start to sob into Cas' shoulder</p><p>"I'm going to miss you so much Castiel" He said pulling away "Really, I am"</p><p>"I know" Cas smiled- despite everything he <em>smiled- </em>because if he didn't he'd probably be in tears, "C'mon we should probably get to sleep you have a long trip in the morning"</p><p>He kissed Dean softly and they shifted into a spooning position, Cas wrapped his arms around Dean in a protective manner and Dean embraced it</p><p>Surprisingly they slept soundly that whole night</p><p>~<br/><br/></p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Life Goes On</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Six months later</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>Gabriel was in the apartment alone <br/>
and due to extreme boredom had decided to rewatch IT for the hundredth time just because</p><p>He was about a good half hour into the movie when Sam came home, "Hey," He greeted and put his bags down, "How was the library?" Gabriel asked as Sam sat down next to him</p><p>"Perfect- we had the whole place to ourselves" He grinned, "You can't be an introvert forever Samshine"</p><p>But his boyfriend just shrugged "Watch me" He said teasingly "So what are you- oh my god!" His scream shocked Gabriel so much he almost got his popcorn everywhere</p><p>When Sam had looked at the TV he didn't expect there to be a dancing clown staring at him, it startled him so he quickly grabbed the blanket and pulled it over himself</p><p>Gabriel was beyond confused "..Sam?..are you okay?"</p><p>There was a nod from the covers "Yeah...it's just I have this <em>thing</em>..with uh..with <em>clowns</em>"</p><p>"..You're scared of clowns?"</p><p>"M-More like terrifed" Sam supplied from under the covers, Gabriel turned off the TV and Sam peeked out from the blanket "I'm sorry I know it's lame but they just really creep me out" His face was flushed red, he was more than embarrassed and Gabriel could see that "Hey, it's totally okay" He said "If you don't like clowns then I don't like clowns"</p><p>"Really?- you're not gonna make fun of me?"</p><p>"I would never Samwich," He kissed Sam on the forehead, "How is he by the way?- Cassie?"</p><p>Sam sighed "He's better, kinda hardcore focused on his work though- I think it's because it distracts him" He said "I miss him"</p><p>Gabriel nodded, sighing on Sam's shoulder "Yeah me too"</p><p>~</p><p>Cas entered his dark and empty apartment, throwing down his keys wherever he left his backpack in the living room</p><p>He heated up the leftovers in the fridge, just some pizza he'd had the other night and stalked over to the living room, hopping down onto the couch to watch old Law and Order reruns with his pizza and a beer he'd grabbed</p><p>After eating he cleaned up and headed up to the bedroom, he pulled off his clothes to jump in the shower, giving a long sigh when the warm water hit his back</p><p>Drying off his hair he nakedly walked out of the bathroom, discarding of the towel so that he could find a shirt to wear to bed when he stumbled upon Dean's clothes</p><p>He picked up a shirt he saw and breathed it in, it smelt of pie and beer, Cas smiled- it smelt like Dean, he threw the shirt on and found some briefs to go with</p><p>Stumbling into his bed, pulling the covers up, he sighed heavily- curling up and closing his eyes he imagined Dean was with him, holding him as he slept and whispering sweet nothings into his ears</p><p>He let one single tear roll down his cheeks and folded in on himself more, keeping the sobs at bay as he finally fell asleep</p><p>~</p><p>
  <em>Another six months later</em>
</p><p>Sam groaned flopping down on the couch "Cas, I can't do this!" He turned to his friend with pleading eyes and Cas chuckled "Yes you <em>can</em>"</p><p>"No I can't" He huffed, "This is too hard, I've been pre law for a year and I'm already seriously considering giving up and letting Gabriel be my sugar daddy"</p><p>"Sam you did not come this far just to quit- what would Dean say?"</p><p>Sam shrugged lazily "I don't know something about a pie?" Cas laughed "Probably, but he'd also tell you to finish what you started"</p><p>Sam sighed "You're right- I hate it when you're right"</p><p>"No you don't"</p><p>Sam rolled his eyes "Why didn't Gabriel just take me with him to New York?- I can adapt quickly to cold places!"</p><p>"Because it was strictly business, I know you're horny but I haven't had sex in a year, you can wait a <em>week</em>"</p><p>Sam put his hands up in surrender "Okay- okay, but don't you miss it?- I mean you're <em>allowed</em> to miss it"</p><p>"Sex?"</p><p>Sam nodded "Yeah, sex"</p><p>"I <em>do</em> own sex toys Sam- and no- it's nowhere near having Dean and I make love- and or fuck" He nodded "I do miss his hands on me though, whether it's cuddling or just.." He sighed</p><p>Sam nodded "Yeah I get it" He said sympathetically "Y'know speaking of <em>sex, </em>have you reconsidered it?"</p><p>Cas scoffed when he finally got what Sam was saying and waved a dismissive hand "Sam for the last time I've never wanted to get bottom surgery- I don't get why you and Gabe keep wanting me to do this?" He questioned "I told Dean that I didn't want bottom surgery and if he shows up next year and I have a dick?-"</p><p>"Do you keep saying no because <em>Dean</em> would be more comfortable if you didn't get it?- or because <em>you</em> really don't want it?"</p><p>Cas parted his lips to speak but when he realised he had nothing to say on the matter he shook his head and stood from the couch to get a snack from the kitchen "I don't know Sam- what if I get the surgery and I'm not attractive to him anymore?- what then?"</p><p>"Not possible- Dean loves you" Sam cracked a smile as he pushed himself up from the couch to join Cas in making a snack "And you do know he's bisexual right?- Dean really just loves hearts not <em>parts</em>, it's your decision- no matter what Cas"</p><p>Cas sighed, reaching for the chips but Sam grabbed them out of his hands, "I'll think about it okay?" He huffed out, though mostly just to get his chips back</p><p>Sam gave him the chips "Okay" He sighed "You're my brother Cas, I just worry about you"</p><p>Cas paused, frowning as he tilted his head to the left "You consider me your brother?"</p><p>Sam scoffed "Yeah of course, I considered it even before you and Dean got engaged- we're family"</p><p>"Thank you Sam"</p><p>"Don't mention it Cas- seriously the second you and Dean got together I knew it was going to be for forever" </p><p>~</p><p>
  <em>Three months </em>
  <em>later</em>
</p><p>Gabe set his keys down and made his way to Sam who was laying curled up and asleep on the couch with books and papers layed out on the table in front of him "Hey Sammy?" Gabriel said sofly and Sam groaned, slowly opening his eyes "Gabe?" </p><p>"You wanna sleep on something more comfortable and moose sized?- like a bed?" Gabriel proposed and Sam nodded "M'kay" He said and Gabe helped him up to their bedroom </p><p>Sam plopped down on the bed, struggling to keep his eyes open as he lifted his arms for Gabe to take his shirt off "You're never up this late Sam, what's wrong?" Gabe asked; Sam had a better sleep schedule than him and was never up past nine thirty unless he had good reason to be</p><p>Sam yawned "Studying" He pouted "So much studying" Gabe smiled "Aww, I know studying sucks" </p><p>"If I knew law was gonna be this hard- I never would've done it" Sam claimed and Gabe shook his head "That's not true but okay" He chuckled </p><p>"Where are you going?" Sam asked when Gabriel was done with his clothes, and putting him to bed- he was making his way to the door after giving him a kiss on the head "I want cuddles"</p><p>"I know- I'm just gonna clean up downstairs, I'll be right back"</p><p>He hurried to clean Sam's books up making sure they were put together in correct order so that Sam wouldn't be confused</p><p>Gabriel really felt for his boyfriend, what Sam was attempting was great at this rate he'd probably be a lawyer at twenty four, but he didn't like what all the late nights and studying was doing to Sam's head</p><p>He sighed and made sure everything was cleaned before heading back upstairs to find Sam curled up and on his side of the bed sleeping soundly, it made him smile as he quietly closed he door behind him, changing into more comfortable clothes and joining Sam on the bed</p><p>He pulled his boyfriend into his arms and stroked Sam's hair, "Hey Sammy?" He said hoping the boy was at least a little bit awake, Sam hummed in response, forcing open his eyes "Yeah?"</p><p>"Can you promise me something?"</p><p>Sam nodded, "Promise me you'll take care of yourself, all these lates nights and long hours at school are messing with your head" </p><p>"You care about me" Sam whispered, smiling proudly as he blinked up at Gabriel, Gabriel rolled his eyes "Yeah I do and I want to know that you're alright"</p><p>"How about we spend <em>allll</em>, of tomorrow together, just us" Sam sighed shifting in Gabriel's arms "I guess I do need a break"</p><p>Gabriel smiled kissing his forehead "Deal"</p><p>-</p><p>
  <em>Three</em>
  <em> days later</em>
</p><p>Gabriel pouted "I'm not allowed to leave- see I'm so short that Sam thinks I'll venture off and he won't be able to find me" Sam chuckled "That's not true, I just want us to do these things together like a normal couple"</p><p>Gabriel blushed at that but rolled his eyes to act annoyed "Uh, huh" But Sam saw and smiled at him</p><p>Cas nodded "I think Sam is right, it would be nice"</p><p>Gabe shook his head, "Tsk, tsk, tsk- you were like a brother to me Castiel" Cas deadpaned "I am your brother"</p><p>Gabriel walked off, with the two following behind him "Sorry can't hear you over the sting of betrayal"</p><p>Cas sighed and turned to Sam "How do you put up with him?" Sam raised a brow "How did you put up with Dean?" And then Cas got it, "Exactly"</p><p>"Oh candy!" Gabriel reached up excitedly but even on his toes he couldn't get it "C'mom- c'mon- c'mom"</p><p>Sam sighed and with a short stretch of his arm he had gotten the bag Gabriel wanted and dumped it into the cart</p><p>He shrugged "Perks of having a six foot four boyfriend" Gabriel smiled at him "My hero" Sam giggled and kissed Gabe on the forehead, "Love you too"</p><p>-</p><p>
  <em>Two weeks and four days later</em>
</p><p>"Sam?- Sam?" Cas repeated flashing his hands in Sam's face until his friend shook himself out of the trance he was in</p><p>"Sorry what we're you saying?"</p><p>Cas gestured to the tons of books on the table before them "The test-tomorrow- we're supposed to be studying?" </p><p>"Oh, yeah right- sorry"</p><p>Cas eyed him "You don't seem right, you're usually more focused" He quirked his brow "What's wrong?- are there problems with Gabriel?"</p><p>Sam shook his head fast "No, no Gabe and I are fine..really, fine- I just I went to the hospital this morning before I came over here" He gave a shaky sigh "I messed up"</p><p>"Messed up how?"</p><p>"I'm pregnant, with Gabriel's kid"</p><p>Cas' shoulders hunched  "Oh," He said "What are you going to do?"</p><p>Sam sighed "I don't know..Cas, I'm so scared- I know college is supposed to be hard and I <em>prepared</em> for that but not for this"</p><p>"Well how far along are you?- when was the last time you and Gabriel.."</p><p>Sam laughed lightly, "Cas we don't have to talk about that part, Gabe is your brother, we're family- you don't want to hear that"</p><p>"Sam I an MD in training, maybe I can help"</p><p>Sam sighed "I think that I'm about three weeks, around that time I guess I wasn't doing so good and Gabe roped me into relaxing all day and I guess that included sex without a condom" He scoffed at himself "I wasn't even on the pill" He buried his head in his hands shaking his head "God I am so stupid"</p><p>"Sam no you're not, you've been tired I get it" Cas said supportively "Now is not the time for the regret and 'what if's' you need to figure out what you're going to do"</p><p>Sam fell back into the pillows "Well I know I'm not telling Gabriel"</p><p>"Why not?"</p><p>Sam chewed his lip "I just..I don't want him to be mad"</p><p>"Sam..I know my brother can be a lot but he is <em>not</em> like that"</p><p>"Gabriel doesn't need my problems, okay?- this was my fault"</p><p>Cas rolled his eyes "Well <em>he</em> stuck his dick in you- and <em>got</em> you pregnant- so this does not need to be soley on you,  you are in a relationship therefore you're problems are his problems" He said firmly "It's not about what <em>he</em> wants it's about what <em>you</em> do"</p><p>Sam looked down at his hands "I want an abortion" He said quietly "I don't want a baby- not now at least"</p><p>"Then tell Gabriel that"</p><p>Sam nodded "I will just..not right now, things are good between us, I want it to stay that way for a little while longer"</p><p>"How are you gonna do that?""</p><p>Sam shrugged "I won't start showing for a while, I can hide the morning sickness and the cramps" </p><p>"But you're going to tell him right?- before you get the abortion?" Cas asked again "Gabriel deserves to know"</p><p>"Yes, I will, I promise"</p><p>"Good" Cas said "Now are you okay to get back to work or are you gonna throw up on my couch?"</p><p>Sam shoved him playfully "Shut up" He gasped lightly and swallowed making Cas eye him warily "Sam?"</p><p>"I think I might actually throw up" Sam gaged slightly with a hand over his mouth, "Sam you better be joking!"</p><p>Sam broke out in laughs "Sorry I had to" He panted between laughs and Cas glared "Not funny, so not funny"</p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Author Note- Help!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The author needs help</p>
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    <p>Hi!- chapters are in the works right now but my writers block is killing me!!</p><p>But I have a couple ideas for four smutty/fluffy chapters one for each character about Sam, Dean, Cas, and Gabriel's life before they met revealing few things that have not yet been revealed to post as little filler chapters, cmt if you'd like that, if not..um..I don't know? Lmao</p><p> </p>
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